"The WSL is excited about the venue's potential in 2020 and beyond!"
More news has trickled in regards to this morning’s reported shuttering of Kelly Slater’s Surf Ranch in Lemoore, California or rather gushed. Sources very close to Santa Monica’s levers of power let it be known that Kelly Slater Wave Co.’s Solana Beach office is not closing, Surf Ranch is staying open and, moreover, the whole operation is staffing right up.
A Surf Ranch bull market!
A Surf Ranch revival!
A World Surf League spokesman went on the record, a rare treat, to state unequivocally that:
The Surf Ranch Lemoore facility continues to invest in new staff and experiences and the WSL is excited about the venue’s potential in 2020 and beyond.
That right there is as solid as it gets but… something feels fishy. Something feels…off as the sources for the original story were also very close to Santa Monica’s levers of power.
So what is going on here?
I’ll wander down to those Kelly Slater Wave Co.’s Solana Beach offices soon and peek in the windows but until then lets speculate some more.
Is the Surf Ranch property in Lemoore, California truly viable? Once the novelty wears off can it be a money-making corporate retreat? Site of a summer music/surf festival? Other? It certainly doesn’t produce enough waves to be open to the general public but will Google, Facebook and Purdue Pharma pay top dollar, year over year, to host “employee days” under the cow stinky sun?
Maybe.
We are currently living through a VAL bull market, a VAL explosion, but it still makes more sense that co-Waterperson of the Year Dirk Ziff slowly transfers resources from the one-time test facility to a larger, more functional model almost exactly like the piece of property just acquired outside of Austin, Texas that once housed a Wavegarden.
But what do I know? Maybe not that much. Maybe more than I should.
More as the story develops.
Fiji and Trestles are missed along with the Maldives etc.
the wording of “The Lemoore Surf Ranch Facility” is very carefully worded. Your first story might not be 100% incorrect.
You must’ve missed the 30ft long “Shark dick” that someone spray painted on the Margaret River Pro sign after the event was cancelled last year. Truly a work of art.
Definitely due for a comeback
Smoke inhaled and Kool Aid drunk?
I think it becomes a place for corporate retreats. Instead of taking the employees to Vegas, much healthier to go freshwater surfing.
fuck and here I am or was getting so excited for a new WSL tour ..The Chlorinated Pool Tour…CPT…
have the WSL thought about buying Webbers wave platforms…the Salty Platform tour..SPT….
or maybe ol Ziffy and his K-tubs…are now obsolescent ….but his money is not , so will the gravy train continue for one and all…..Herr Ziffy will eventually let us alll know, when he is ready!
I think you inspired someone…
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So the former article is fake news; at least you followed quickly with a retraction unlike most big media outlets who just move on to the next lie.
I personally don’t think the first one is fake. I think lots of smoke is being thrown here.
So the cowfartlandia, earth wrecking, money grubbed, wake boardish, douche machine is surviving?
You’ll get stuck at Culture and never make it to KSWC’s Solana office.
Head to the hills when the two sevens clash.
mens longboard contest is the same as men’s beach volleyball
I already stopped by for you, Chas. It’s boomin’! https://uploads.disquscdn.c…
Hahaha!
is that chester in the red jacket?
Peeking in the window!
And Chas’s dislocated shoulder winces in pain.
“Lemoore has our full confidence.”
Brutal.
Lemoore = John Bolton!
Kolohe, victorious in the pool, giving his victory speech to Rosie, rips off his Hurley hat and replaces it with a red MAGA: ” And I just wanna say, Lemoore, you’re FIRED”
And Matt Biolis chants in the background “U S A! U S A! U S A!”
MR in chains and bag over head, in the background.
I’ll take a job there and as official grumpy local saboteur. Caddyshack floaters will look like child’s play.
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It’s a Baby Ruth.
FAKE TITS!