"Dangerous marine life."
There was once a time when Portugal’s navy ruled all the oceans of the earth. The tiny European nation wielded this power by exploring far away worlds, conquering some and destroying others, walloping competing navies while also enjoying lightly toasted Francesinhas.
All things come to an end, though, and Portuguese naval might faded with the invent of Great Britain. Soon there were only aggrieved memories of what once was. The faint tang of vanished power mingling with the smell of bacalhau a bras.
Well, breaking news from St. Augustine, Florida, the oldest continually inhabited settlement of European origin in the United States of America, suggest that a revival may be in the works as an armada of “furious” man o’ wars have surrounded the city, washing up on the beach, stinging people and forcing them to urinate all over each other but let’s go directly to the source, to ABC’s First Coast News for the terrifying latest.
If you are planning to celebrate the holiday break at the beach, be careful. There have been multiple reports of Portuguese Man O’Wars washing up along local beaches.
Photos posted on various Facebook groups showed the Man O’Wars on St. Augustine Beach as well as Neptune Beach.
However, if you are at an isolated beach with no lifeguard tower, there are a few ways you can treat yourself. According to Web.com, you can stop the stinging by rinsing the area with vinegar for at least 30 seconds.
Next, remove tentacles with a pair of tweezers and soak the affected area in hot water for at least 20 minutes
Clean open sores three times a day and apply antibiotic ointment. Bandage if needed.
Keep an eye on the flags that are flying at the beaches. If it’s purple, it means “dangerous marine life” and you’re advised to use caution when in the water.
Remove tentacles with a pair of tweezers? Clean open sores three times a day?
Very disgusting and, I imagine, against the Geneva Conventions. I imagine this will all be reviewed by The Hague soon.
But, quickly, have you ever paddled through a jelly whilst surfing? Was it a Portuguese man o’ war exhibiting his nationalistic zeal? How did it end? Did you bring up Portugal’s failing economy in a dismissive way?
Rude.
More as the story develops.
Few things exist that can make a man scream like a little girl, the sting of Manowar
https://youtu.be/Dll329ggLIY
Sharks and jellyfish
Cannot successfully mate
Thank fuck for that, eh?
– For EH
But they’re not jellyfish!!
Who knows if sharks and siphonophores can cross-pollinate. Imagine a Great Blue and White, the aquatic version of Priscilla Queen of The Desert
No it was in Australia ….. that’s definitely a European Thing .
Last time I was in Boca Raton , I had a hot chick from New Jersey pee on me.
Funny thing was, I actually never got stung…
Classic!
featured comment right there…
Pppffffwweeerrre-kikikiki
Pthththpthp-eeeeee-ikikik
{spout}
Couple of years ago I surfed in a soup of clear jellies. Hand-sized to microscopic. They made the water gloopy, they were so thick but almost invisible.
Minor prickly stings but not even on ‘sea-lice’ scale.
Totally trippy experience.
In the month of August in France during the night you can jump in the shorebreak and activate fluorescent green plankton …. and they don’t even sting ….. unlike the fish with a little spine on their back who loved to be stepped on a sting like buggery and provide absolutely no disco light show
Hey Chas, choke on a man o war.
Didn’t realize this was Florida grit.
I told you a week ago that Victoria in Australia has been overrun by man o wars. They’ve migrated thousands of km from NSW/QLD to get here and it’s extremely rare. The beach towns are flooded with tourists in 100°+ heat, all flocking to the beach, and kids getting slaughtered by them.
But whatever
We, you mostly, shall be their voice!
What did Florida do to get you, and Victoria represented by a worm?!
And what’s going on with disqus.
And Happy New Year!
Yeah..and how about a story about how dangerous it is walking around Torquay atm with Chinese drivers on the wrong side of the road.
And never mind beware the white shark… how about beware the 2018 white Toyota Corolla!!!
Oh damn it. I’m sorry. I’m sorry!
Can you do something about the diqsuqs negatron.
Soft. Blue Bottles will give you a bit of a zap and then leave a mark. Big deal. Just heard on the radio that Irukandji have been found at Fraser Island. Less than 80km from this neck of the beach. Gonna have to start wearing stinger suits and doing video reviews on new boards for Beach Grit to surf Noosa soon.
That s gonna sting the real estate market.
For real
estate
I have had 2 different small hits from man-o-fragments which were thrilling and incredible. While paddling, when my wrist hit the surface of the water I felt a pain so severe and intense that I pulled my hand back before it penetrated the water. I turtled up on the board then paddled back one handed. My wrist felt on fire so I scrubbed it with a slurry of wet sand for a few minutes which helped a bunch. I missed a very small piece which was still very painful for about 6 weeks. I’m greatful that I have never been fully wrapped.
Man-o-wars make regular jellyfish seem kind of like a comical curiosity.
Can something be done about that ad for the Metallica AI boardshorts?
Kill em all
Blue bottles …..I was working a split shift in a Cocktail Bar overlooking a Point Break in Sydney and after watching the waves from behind the bar for 3 hours , I was itching to get out there in the break I had before the next shift ….. ran the 15 minutes to get board , ran back in 10 minutes flat , jumped off the rocks , straight into a set …… but while stroking to takeoff my bare belly came in contact with a blue bottle and was forced at the end of the wave to come in prone …. walk slowly back to the house and lay down as the venom started to attack the glands under my armpits and groin …. finally wore off 15 minutes before I had to get back to work ……worked 8 hours watching it break , caught one wave …. fuck blue bottles !
Hadn’t been stung in years but last summer had beauty as they seem to come in attack formation when the wind light ( too strong and blows over the top of them). Light easterly was surfing t shirt just watching them around me good 2-3ft clean fun but heaps massed together, but you could avoid them.. Caught wave paddling out little rogue 4ft set broke wide duckdived, came up wrapped around neck in corner mouth all up arm and legs – pulled them all off just, while almost cardiac arrest – warm water bottles in car – my go to is 3 x 3L milk bottles warmed on roof – so luckily they dissipated the pain till got home. Hung in warm shower 40 mins – basically laid on floor foetal position and took antihistamine
Welts on me for months
FUN
That’s why they call it Red Head.
You could write a good penthouse forum.
I almost got a halfa
About 10yrs back a mate and I got curly, mid week, absolutely pumping, and no one out. The blueys were piled up at the shoreline but after a solemn promise to “see each other out the back” I put my head down and went for it. Made it out unscathed and turned around to see old mate still on shore laughing his arse off. I knew I was fucked by then and turned to go on the first bump that appeared, but caught about 20 of them around the legs, torso, arms, and neck as I paddled at it.
Had to get my mate to drive home cause the swelling in my pits and groin was so bad I was basically a vegetable. 30 minutes in a boiling hot shower sorted me out but it fucking itched for weeks.
I hid a flathead in his car a few weeks later as punishment.