Bali cops use “public humiliation” to reign in COVID-19 rule-breakers!

Bali introduces a "Public Health” enforcement where offending parties may be asked to dismount their scooters and go through a number of roadside calisthenics…

Finding it difficult to enforce the mandatory mask wearing rules here in Bali, the police force has decided to punish offenders with something more effective than just a warning and small fine.

A new “Public Health” enforcement where offending parties may be asked to dismount their scooters and go through a number of roadside calisthenics.

“It’s not so bad,” says Jim Rescka, a recent expat bustee, “But it is kind of embarrassing when your friends and neighbours see you doing jumping jacks on the side of the road in the noon day sun.”

Talking anonymously, one of the enforcers commented that, “We make sure it is only the men that can handle it. It’s not like we are gonna make a little old lady do it” (Translated).

“On any normal day,” Says a Kuta Beach lifeguard, “You would see fifty surf schools doing pop-ups all day long, so it could be good training to drive around without a mask.”

No news on how long this new consequence will be held in place, but it sure beats trying to keep up with Johanne Defay’s online workout in your living room.

https://www.instagram.com/p/B_MXEV-qcub/

In other news, the some boardriders clubs here are successfully working with local authorities to keep local surfers in the water.

Show up with a boardriders membership card or a local ID with an address in the neighbourhood and you can paddle out.

But hanging on the beach is still strictly taboo.

Can you imagine trying this local ID bit in California?

Wait!

It already exists.

You ever try to surf where Strider Wasilewski lives?


Bobby Kennedy (right) and JFK discussing surfers and surfing (likely).

Bobby Kennedy’s son comes swinging in on side of surfers as “Coronavirus Gestapo” carries out raid on Point Dume!

A champion for The People™!

The war on surfers and those who enjoy eating Asian fusion outdoors has reached a critical phase. Our kind has been driven underground, chased by the jackboot, flogged from sea to shining sea.

Hated by The State.

But as in all times of crisis, unexpected heroes rise and who could have ever guessed that we would have Robert F. Kennedy’s son, Robert F. Kennedy Jr. on our side. Holding our mantle high.

Robert F. Kennedy, or Bobby, you certainly know, was brother of JFK, civil rights icon, United States Attorney General and presidential hopeful gunned down in hail of bullets. The Kennedy family is as close to royalty as once-free America has and now we have one as our very own champion and let us go to Instagram where RFK, Jr. lays our scene.

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Yesterday, Malibu police gave a dozen $1000.00 tickets to surfers on Point Dume. Meanwhile, LA hospitals are empty. None have issued a “Divert” notice since this crisis began. So what is the end game? I’m happy to comply with the quarantine but is there a rational plan? Political leaders told us we would quarantine initially to flatten the curve so as to prevent a surge that would overwhelm our health care system. We would give hospitals time to gear up; beds, ventilators, masks, tests and therapeutic treatment protocols. Then we would end the general quarantine while continuing to isolate and protect the elderly and immunocompromised. We would allow the virus to spread through healthy populations until we establish natural herd immunity that protects everyone. “Mission creep” has moved us into the Gates/ Fauci scheme: Quarantine until we have a vaccine.It’s not a prudent bet. Despite decades of effort and hundreds of millions of dollars spent, no one has ever developed a functional coronavirus vaccine. Due to peculiarities unique to coronavirus, earlier efforts have produced vaccines that seemed ideal until they caused cataclysmic side effects including death. The top virologists from the US, China, and Europe have all succeeded in creating COVID vaccines that promote robust and durable antibody response-the metric by which vaccines are licensed-but when vaccinated individuals or animals encountered the wild disease, those antibodies actually worsened the infection-often with lethal consequences. Furthermore, COVID-19 is mutating with extraordinary rapidity-Chinese scientists recently found over 30 strains in a single hospital. A vaccine that offers protection against a single strain may do little to control spread of the contagion. Finally, WHO has warned that frequent observations of reinfection suggests that coronavirus antibodies may offer meager protection against the disease. This revelation casts doubt on the entire vaccine enterprise. Our political leaders need to stop putting faith in Tony Fauci and begin applying common sense A prolonged quarantine might kill more Americans than COVID-19

A post shared by Robert F. Kennedy Jr. (@robertfkennedyjr) on

Yesterday, Malibu police gave a dozen $1000.00 tickets to surfers on Point Dume. Meanwhile, LA hospitals are empty. None have issued a “Divert” notice since this crisis began. So what is the end game? I’m happy to comply with the quarantine but is there a rational plan?

Political leaders told us we would quarantine initially to flatten the curve so as to prevent a surge that would overwhelm our health care system. We would give hospitals time to gear up; beds, ventilators, masks, tests and therapeutic treatment protocols. Then we would end the general quarantine while continuing to isolate and protect the elderly and immunocompromised.

We would allow the virus to spread through healthy populations until we establish natural herd immunity that protects everyone. “Mission creep” has moved us into the Gates/ Fauci scheme: Quarantine until we have a vaccine.

It’s not a prudent bet.

Despite decades of effort and hundreds of millions of dollars spent, no one has ever developed a functional coronavirus vaccine. Due to peculiarities unique to coronavirus, earlier efforts have produced vaccines that seemed ideal until they caused cataclysmic side effects including death. The top virologists from the US, China, and Europe have all succeeded in creating COVID vaccines that promote robust and durable antibody response-the metric by which vaccines are licensed-but when vaccinated individuals or animals encountered the wild disease, those antibodies actually worsened the infection-often with lethal consequences.

Furthermore, COVID-19 is mutating with extraordinary rapidity-Chinese scientists recently found over 30 strains in a single hospital. A vaccine that offers protection against a single strain may do little to control spread of the contagion. Finally, WHO has warned that frequent observations of reinfection suggests that coronavirus antibodies may offer meager protection against the disease. This revelation casts doubt on the entire vaccine enterprise.

Our political leaders need to stop putting faith in Tony Fauci and begin applying common sense A prolonged quarantine might kill more Americans than COVID-19.

And amen.

Or do you disagree?


"What you gonna do about it Kelly?"

Breaking: “Savage” 10-foot Great White Shark swims into Cocoa Beach lagoon, mocks precious memory of native son Kelly Slater!

Extremely Homeric.

The Coronavirus Gestapo’s iron grip on the world’s surfing community has loosened, slightly, this past week with beaches opening or whispers of them opening soon. The Reign of Terror being, at least momentarily, paused.

Oh, many will flock to the sand, to the waves, and try to re-create the simple pleasures of days before a Chinese bat destroyed freedom but those in Cocoa Beach, Florida should exercise extreme caution and probably not surf at all for it is there that a savage 10-foot Great White shark is swimming in a lagoon very close to people.

Very close to their toes, ankles and calf muscles.

But you certainly know Cocoa Beach as hometown of the world’s greatest surfer Kelly Slater. He is not there. He is in Australia not being allowed to look at the ocean and the shark is certainly mocking him. Mocking him exactly like Odysseus’s suitors mocked him whilst he was on his great Odyssey, trying to get with his wife and whatnot.

Per the shark tracking organization OCEARCH:

Surprise Brevard County! A near 10-foot male Great White Shark named ‘Cabot’ has registered inside the Indian River Lagoon near SR 528 in Cocoa on Saturday, according to Ocearch.

The ‘ping’ came in at 11:14 a.m. on Saturday which registers a satellite tracker attached to the shark’s dorsal fin when it breaks the surface of the water.

‘Cabot’ was recorded as a 9-foot-eight inch, sub-adult white shark, and weighing in around 533-pounds when it was tagged October 5, 2018 in Nova Scotia.

Ocearch’s partner, SeaWorld, named him using suggestions from Nova Scotians after the explorer John Cabot.

Since being tagged in 2018, ‘Cabot’ has logged more than 6,700 miles of distance covered.

This is the first known recording of an Ocearch tagged Great White Shark pinging inside the Indian River Lagoon, since Ocearch began tagging sharks in 2007.

Great mockery seeing that Kelly Slater had a very lousy 2007 only winning the Boost Mobile Pro across the country at Lower Trestles.

But how will Kelly respond? Like Odysseus and eventually coming back to claim his rightful place as husband and lover or like Steve Harvey and just leave the old gal behind forever?

Much to ponder.


Explosive: Surfing royal “murdered” in his North Shore bath-tub claims author!

New books reveals “The epic life and mysterious death” of a wanna-be pro surfing British viscount…

Twenty-three years ago, the 11th Earl of Coventry, and wanna-be pro surfer, Ted Deerhurst was found dead in the tub of his condo at the Kuilima, the residential development that surrounds the Turtle Bay Hotel on the North Shore.

Deerhurst’s celebrity, if you can call it that, had peaked fifteen years earlier in 1982 when filmmakers Dick Hoole and Jackie McCoy devoted a hunk of their classic surf movie Storm Riders to Lord Ted.

If we peer into the corners of surf history via Warshaw’s impeccable archive, we find,

Despite the fact that he had only middling success as an amateur, Deerhurst turned pro in 1977. He was handsome and likable, and while some pros resented the fact that he had essentially bought his way into the profession, he was for the most part a popular addition to the world tour. For years, Deerhurst was the only touring British pro. He came to the attention of the surfing world in 1982, when he was featured on the cover of Surfer magazine, posed with five custom surfboards and two hunting hounds on the rolling lawn in front of the family manor. He was nicknamed “The British Lion,” although his world tour friends called him “Lord Ted.”

Deerhust world tour trials and tribulations, year after year, became both a source of amusement and inspiration. “Try as he might,” surf journalist Nick Carroll later remembered, “Ted could not get through a heat. Even when he was in form, something would go wrong; he’d miss his third wave, snap his leash, lose the shorebreak reform. But somhow, next event, Ted would be back, the British Lion, trying as hard as ever.

Deerhurst died of heart failure in 1997, brought on by an epileptic seizure, in a North Shore hotel room.”

So far so ordinary, no?

Now, a new book by British author Andy Martin, whose 1991 surf memoir Walking on Water won the William Hill Sports Book of the Year, claims Deerhurst was murdered in his tub at the behest of a shadowy North Shore gangster.

In Surf, Sweat and Tears, the epic life and mysterious death of Edward George William Omar Deerhurst, which has just been released on OR Books, buy here etc, we find Deerhurst, besotted by a Honolulu stripper to the point where he loses his mind over her, and even when he’s warned away by a nicknamed “Pit Bull”, he keeps coming back.

Now falling in love with strippers ain’t uncommon.

Who can blame a man when he falls under the spell of those women with the big velvety eyes and the heavy animal perfume and sinuous snaky bodies and with sparks no ordinary woman can match.

But, in Deerhurst’s case, he wants to marry his stripper, and he winds up breathing his last breath, in an empty bath tub.

In SST, Martin talks to a man who found the royal’s body.

“Dan got back to 100 East Kuilima around 7:30 pm. The house was quiet…Ted was in the bath. He was naked. And he was dead. But he hadn’t been having a peaceful bath and sailed away into the great beyond. Something violent had happened to him. There was no water in the bath for one thing… Ted is face down in the bath with his legs sticking out at the side. He is not breathing. His lips have turned blue and rigorous mortis has set in. There is blood in the bath. There is a “contusion” (as it says in the report) at the back of his head. And there are injuries to his face too: cuts on his nose, a black eye. He looks, prima facie, as if he has been beaten up. But, say the price, Ted beat himself up.”

It’s a wild ride.

“In death,” writes Martin, “Ted had finally become the hero he always wanted to be.”


Revealed: You can go on a surfing and yoga retreat from the safe space safe space of your very own home!

#HomeBreakChallenge

Do you recall, just a few short months ago, when the phrase “safe space” entered the English lexicon and meant, “Places created for individuals who feel marginalized to come together to communicate regarding their experiences with marginalization” where no violence, harassment, hate speech were tolerated?

A golden era but too soon eclipsed by the current definition of “safe space” which means, “Places where no other dirty human beings are allowed with their various novel coughs, sneezes, yuck, yuck.”

Well, the two safe spaces have recently merged and shall we read about a very wonderful new surfing and yoga retreat that you can attend from the clean comfort of your very own home?

It’d be violent, harassing, hateful to keep it from you.

It’s Sunday afternoon and I’m polishing my surfing “pop up” technique under the instructor’s watchful gaze. I lie prone, elbows in, chest raised and push off the balls of my feet, jumping into a wobbly high crouch. It’s not the most graceful move, but coach Rachel shouts encouragement at my efforts.

I’m on a “retreat” with Soul & Surf, which runs yoga and surfing holidays in Portugal, India and Sri Lanka, but this weekend we’re not in an exotic location by the sea. I’m trying out its new Soul & Surf Pause – a two-day “virtual holiday” with the action taking place in my living room via Zoom.

“We wanted to recreate the elements of a retreat with us – and stay connected while we can’t travel,” said co-founder Ed Templeton. “There’s the yoga and surfing, but that sense of community too.”

Boom.

A new golden era and one that VALs, WSLers, The Inertia should embrace with pasty but toned arms.

The ocean is deadly. It has Coronavirus and will continue to have it. Plus sharks.

No more surfing.

Ever.

Perpetual #HomeBreakChallenge.