Woke.
Last night, after a full day of homeschooling, light yard work and a slimy red tide surf, I rolled into bed and began scrolling Instagram. A vague sadness permeated, as it was my first night blocked by Kelly Slater, but the ionized glow from a salt lamp soothed my nerves.
Instagram held no surprises, posts of “wacky animals in quarantine” and “ain’t my hair funny in quarantine” followed one after the other until I stumbled upon a particularly odd offering from Stab magazine.
I thought the post had been deleted, per Stab tradition, but just found it. The content praises the World Surf League’s bold recent moves while mocking the Stab commenter as an extremely angry, racially and sexually diverse mob.
The caption read:
“Those who said the @wsl is foolish for proposing a World Title surf-off: do you feel differently after learning that a majority of recent World Champs love the idea?”
But back to the mob.
Have you ever seen one that looks like this?
Is this the group that forced mayors and governors to criminalize surfing around the world?
The group that calls the police when they see a neighbor BBQing with non-relatives?
How many people have they blocked, collectively, on social media?
Is there a manager on stand-by to harangue?
Does Stab make more sense knowing this is the readership?
Many questions.
Spoiled Marxists.
https://www.youtube.com/wat… kayaker ripping it up after the first stylish guy
Just put little bitch into the search engine, talk about a fuss about nothing. CB’s a big Boy.
You are good. I hope you do get a job at Beach Grit. Be good to have some Brazilian input and opinion.
Thats half the people on here lately.
Alright haters, the guy that suggests HB for a “dream tour” stop starts the best BG thread I read in my short time here. So there it is…LMAO!
May I suggest New Smyrna Beach? After all, its all about scoring chicks than anything.
Yeah I’m interested to know the details. I’d imagine like all politicians, Bolso just wanted some cheap political point score cash in with a celebrity.
Who called him a little bitch?
So good.
hey man apologize to kelly
not cool bro
Awesome! I feel like I know more about Gabriel from your translations of this than the wsl has given us in how ever many years. Nice to hear about how he feels on the “controversial” moments which tbh, made me like the lad more. Anything on his friendship with Bolsonaro?
Crazy he thinks he won’t win a bell too.. his surfing last year was flawless, thinking of those smooth BIG bottom to top turns in big ass bells is making want to revisit his heats. Actually, I’m off to the wozz site now!
Calling him a little Bitch?
Next time instead of rolling into bed and browsing Instagram, roll into be and browse porn. Way more satisfying and your wife will probably dig it more too.
Home brew
Bush weed
Gambling
Ne’er do well
Fucked up
Laid
Sounds bloody brilliant, I’m off to sharpen some blades now…
I don’t have roosters but my turkeys are always keen on a fight https://uploads.disquscdn.c…
Benjamin Franklin pushed hard for the turkey to be the Official Bird of the United States. Of course, the Bald Eagle took that Honor. No one wanted to ruin Thanksgiving. Plus bald eagle doesn’t go well with cranberry sauce.
The eagle defintely looks impressive and has a certain air of majesty about it, but I think the down to earth strength of the humble turkey lends a sort of homespun nobility that is quite in line with beachgrit commenters…
Of angry mobs – what the fuck is going on with no alcohol in Sth Af – just read couple managed to kill themselves making home brew?? They only drank 1 bottle each. that is some fuckup there all round!!!!
Stab is the equivalent of one of those delusional fuck tards that only says positive things about things that are obviously shit in the hope they subconsciously convince themselves they are happy. Most importantly stab is not funny, nor are the people equivalent.
Eu concordo.
Cheers for the translate! Found that Kelly comment suprising but thinking about it more not as much. That’s just his psychological warfare shtick, keep everyone guessing and second-guessing about the enigma. Wouldn’t be surprised if the days he ‘opens up’ are in close proximity to key heats.
Good dude. Picking between him, JJF, and Italo is silly. All are equally great.
Amazing thanks mate. Nice segue; when I first read it thought he said was in a relationship with Kelly. The tour desperately needs a gay couple competing against each other.