Can I count on your vote?
Last night brought us the official nomination of “Bad Grandpa” Joe Biden as Democratic Party nominee and official close of the Democratic National Convention in Zoom, Wisconsin.
Were you on the edge of your Barcalounger?
Excited?
Monday will kick of the Republican National Convention, in Zoom, North Carolina, and will be much of the same except slightly weirder. Donald J. Trump will accept his party’s official nomination then off to November where Biden vs. Trump will dominate the national narrative.
Are you pumping with energy?
Thrilled?
And it is a good thing absolutely nothing is happening in the larger surf world for it allows me and David Lee Scales to problem solve real issues during our weekly chat. I came up with a new political party, for example. One that is certain to get the lion’s share of the vote in the coming decade.
The Anti-Birthday Party.
It has no position on immigration, human rights, guns, taxes etc. but promises, with enough elected officials, to ban the public singing of “Happy Birthday.”
Such an egregiously horrible song and the whole of the United States of America will be 4% happier overnight with its disappearance.
Have you ever heard anyone hit the high note in an appealing way?
Have you ever been moved either singing or being sung to?
Of course not. The Anti-Birthday Party will bring tangible change and can I count on your vote?
David Lee and I also discussed Kelly Slater and hickeys.
Listen here.
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Hey Chas, when can we get the book on Kindle?
Is Scales really going for the “dad-bod-who-spends-time-with-his-mom-path”? Good luck! He should work out. Only saying the truth here.
Little known fact: Kelly Slater can sing Happy Birthday in Chinese.
Fact. Google it.
The Happy Birthday Song reminds me of Sizzler.
I must have missed the part where the commentariat asked Chas to share his political opinions.
How Americans sound explaining thier politics to the rest of the world..
https://youtu.be/fyvyhkF8Xr4
brilliant
That makes no sense at all! Inbreed sounding light in the pants Queen kneelers. But your comment is about the Greatest Country in the World. Only took 250 years to dominate the World. Go on, gnash your teeth, and cry in jealousy. We’ll watch.
Nick Cave would shudder
For he always voted in
The affirmative
Nick ….taking it to the polls …..pole dancing
https://youtu.be/l5I2vEcVC_I
By the way…does anyone have a photo to put up of that Kamala Harris from about 30 years ago? Was she a good sort or what?
POA
Dam I hate acronyms…i never know what they mean, and don’t want to look any more stupid than I already do by asking
I was on this site 3 fucking months before I worked out what a VAL was
I did watch a recent cardi b video, maybe 200 times so I could fully grasp WAP…I’m all over that one
I also have a secret thing for AOC
LOL… #metoo on the acronyms.
piece of ass
AOC is an ice cream cone, lick lick lick. Oh man, then health care like the rest of the world, then lick lick lick.
from her feet to her neckline. clean it all up.
and make it dirty.
In Australia we had an officially registered political organisation called the Sex Party! Maybe they still exist
They have a strong policy on immigration, human rights, taxes, guns etc…”to all this, we say…fuck it”!
Kind of a one policy fits all scenario
Handing out how to votes at the 2010 election I ended up getting the number of the girl doing the sex party’s. unfortunately though, the story actually ends there. Never pursued.
She really caught a break there.
Man.. Should have followed that one up Ads!
“Only the true messiah denies his divinity “
You definitely fucked her…sneaky bastard
In other news
Here’s a shot of Kelly when he lost his razor… https://uploads.disquscdn.c…
F this. I like singing “happy birthday to you, you live in a zoo”, and I’m NGS (never going to stop).
Peace!
Who is David Scales ( I won’t fucking type a “mans” 3 names)? Is he the gay Ricky Gervais? Wait, is Ricky G gay? I don’t care, he’s funny and DS is not funny in a comedic way.
Is he the guy that you failed to sail to mexico with? Sorry, not fail, quit and returned home? Ok, so it wasn’t easy as auto pilot and vodka lunches. I don’t even know why I”m pissing on your tree, had a good week and surfed every day in good conditions. Maybe it’s all this smoke and the feeling that the mountains in my back yard are doomed to burn again.
I’m so fucking sick of 2020. There, the anti Birthday’s best Anti Birthday.
Fuck everyone.
Welcome to the team.
Well fuck you too?
Fuck you mama, fuck you daddy, fuck you children, fuck you John John, fuck you Jamie O. Fuck you to us all!
The mountains in my backyard are currently burning.
I’ve been struggling with the reality recently that the fires had never hit me personally before.
All I ever gave it was a half interested, man that sucks.
Fucking painful stuff man.
Here’s hoping you guys get spared this year.
I’m a shoe in for the Anti-Birthday Party since I was born on Leap Day. It’s either the best or shittiest birthday, depending on which way you look at it.
You’re a quarter of your actual age. It’s a massive win. You had a birthday this year yeah?
Yeah, I’m 12 now. My youngest child is 13.
Happy birth year!! The kids always take over..
Trevor is with you.
https://www.facebook.com/wa…
“C’mon Man” Biden vs Trump we gonna cop that here till Nov??
Get back to sharks or at least a story on Fannings new kid already being trained to punch sharks
While you’ve taken a hiatus from sharks, beloved Beach Grit fan President Donald Trump picked up the slack.
While speaking to supporters in Pennsylvania, Trump encountered a pesky mosquito, which invariably led to a very Chas-esk tangent on to the surf adjacent topic of sharks.
“I want to get that mosquito out of here, I don’t like them.”
He joked that his critics would accuse him of “cruelty to animals” and then began talking about sharks.
“They were saying the other night, the sharks, we have to protect them,” Trump said, referring to a news program. “They actually want to move all the seals in order to save the shark. And I said wait a minute don’t you have it the other way around?”
A 63-year-old New York City woman was killed in July by a great white shark in Maine, prompting an increase of shark stories and sightings this summer.
“It’s true, I’m not a big fan of sharks either,” Trump said.
He joked that his statement on sharks might hurt him in the 2020 election.
“I don’t know how many votes we are going to lose,” he said.
oh don’t worry…call up ya mate Don, and explain the sharks don’t vote!
Are you sure? Dems have dead people voting for them all the time. Why not sharks.
Q doctrine right there.
were they the extra 3m people who voted for , what was her name again?
I think the republican mud sharks will probably be there , but does it matter, as Kamala Harris will become President!
I forwarded this to Sal Masekela. Should make for akward moments around the competitors area.
and why not dolphins?
Them too.
do you think the dolphins would vote for Kamala , as they are intelligent……and the omeba’s in life would vote for Don?
I think Kamala would prosecute them and imprison them before any of them got a chance.
They do in NYC
yeah I guess if we count the 2 legged mud sharks …..in OZ some people call them business men !
Haha!!!!!!!!
Only the most ignorant bogan-tier ones.
Political Grit
WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY more advertising money.
https://uploads.disquscdn.c…