Gird your loins.
2020 etc. etc. blah blah blah. And have we, the people, ever been so fractured (since 1977)? Republicans hating Democrats, policemen hating activists, Armenians hating Azeris, surfers hating SUPpers and, by extension, the Chief Executive Officer of our own World Surf League.
We, more than ever, need a common enemy and Covid-19 ain’t it. It’s too… esoteric and, let’s be honest, silly. But what about Killer Whales?
Could we unite to fight the great black and white?
They have united to fight us and do you recall reading here, just one month ago from today, that a pod of Killer Whales have teamed up and begun attacking boats in unison off the coasts of Spain and Portugal?
It was never-before-witnessed behavior and stumped scientists.
Until now.
For now, scientists believe that the Killer Whales were carrying out their orchestrated attacks (someone in the comments lambasted me for not using ORCA-strated under the original story and I almost retired then and there) as revenge over their Killer Whale brothers and sisters of getting whacked by rudders.
These un-stumped scientists told Great England’s The Guardian that, “The trigger for this strange and aggressive behaviour could have been an aversive incident that the orcas had with a boat, and in which the speed of the boat could have been a critical factor. For the moment, we have no clear evidence of when it happened, nor can we say for sure what kind of boat may have been involved, nor whether the incident was accidental or deliberate.”
But…
The researchers added that as a result of possible injury by boat, the orcas “may have felt compelled to act when they saw a sailboat in order to slow it down by going after its rudder” — and adding “the killer whales could simply be toying with sailboats ‘out of curiosity’ now that they had discovered the ability to slow or stop a large moving object.”
Sounds like war.
Humans, gird your loins.
We’re back.
As long as they keep munching down on Great Whites, I’m cool with them bumping my boat.
I love those 70s Sci Fi films always shown late on Sunday nights in the 80s
I was fishing in a 10′ dinghy about 50 metres off the rocks and saw what looked like a boat about a mile away coming parallel to the coast towards me, so I cursed them and carried on fishing.
A minute later I glanced up again to see a pod of Orca 100 metres astern and closing quickly.
Very soon a pair of 30 footers was right on my arse with one going about 10′ each side of me.
Their bow wakes lifted my boat a couple of feet as they raised their heads and eyeballed me with dinner plate sized eyes and carried on steaming past.
Gentle giants.
They probably don’t like the Spaniards and Portugeezers due to bullfighting…
Orca says “ NO WAY JOSE ! “
Lazy Chuckie. Old news.
I’ll clear it up for you
He believes climate change is man made but can’t be bothered doing anything about it.
I suggested getting his wife to drive him around.
Cause, well, it’s man made, not women made
Sounds like Medieval Christians , paying there way out of Hell , with a rattle of coins on the collection plate ?
Cape buffalos will lay in wait to kill hunters once they’ve been shot
*Orpocalypse
This story reminds me of Half Baked
https://youtu.be/EhHRt2PpHsQ
“You gotta understand who Killer was, maaaannn”
Ever seen the back of a twenty dollar bill???
On weed??
Must be difficult holding a grudge without opposable thumbs. Orca’n you?
It’s the main reason
Orcas aren’t hating on whales
Via Instagram
Do you think orcas wish they were Kelly Slater? And Kelly wish he was an orca?
Kelly probably
Wishes he was the shark that
Love tapped Mick Fanning
As for the Orcas
Being an ocean thug is
More fun than wave pools
I’m a Pisces but I’d rather be a Killa Whale.
Have you thought about driving a Gemini , then you could be both ?
Awesome! I see a new future for your writing Chas!
We need more un-stumped scientists.
Were the boats carrying any great white livers per chance?
I wish 2020’s plot would thin out a bit.
A hypothesis
Now considered conclusive
No wonder we’re fucked
I think therefore I Know.
I know sweet fuck all
But if I pretend I do
I’m a genius
I know, right?
I said to my client this morning.
Do you think climate change is man made?
I know it is. I’m a bit of a greeny.
So shouldn’t you ride a bike to work?
Fuk that.
The future can be read in Descartes ?
There is definitely then word guess in educated guess ?
Wasn’t Michael Jackson in that killer whale movie that featured young boys, “Free Willy?”
“Orca”. Starring Richard Harris circa 1970’s was a pretty cool movie.