The Vulnerable Adult Learner Swimmer!
Hardened Dublin Bay sea-swimmers are taking a leaf out of the surfers’ book of beefs with as they attack the bona fides of swimmers using Dry Robes.
Dry Robe is brand name of “the world’s most versatile change robe” and costs 150 Euro or 180 American dollars.
The veteran Dublin swimmers’ issue is that the Dry Robe prevents the wearer from experiencing the invigorating post-swim, life-affirming “scrotum tightening” chill of the Irish sea.
“Year-round sea swimming used to be the preserve of a few people, known as “hardies”, deemed brave or mad. That changed several years ago when sea swimming became trendy,” reports The Guardian. “Some hardies associate the robes with arrivistes who snaffle parking spaces, hog benches with their fancy fleeces, call sea swimming ‘wild swimming’ and try to undo the Irish Sea’s effects on the human body.”
Arrivistes? Snaffling parking spaces?
So far, so familiar. Clueless weekender newbies coming into a “our” sacred space and clogging up the line-up – sorry, benches. Those Hardies sure are mysterious; immune to the frigid chill of the Irish sea but very much attached to public seating facilities.
And, they’ve got even more in common with us surf types, complaining about the “Dry Robe Wankers” penchant towards “using GoPros, selfie sticks and other devices to document fleeting swims.”
Anti-Dry Robe posters have already appeared, surely we’re only a couple of hogged-benches away from a slashed tire or two.
Naturally, BeachGrit will follow the story as it progresses.
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Great Towel , wonderful partner .
A 20€ beach towel was the only asset I brought to my marriage ….
Fuck him. I bought two of those. One for inside the house. Weather is miserable here. Easy for all of you pussies to raise your voice in balmy weather.
Somebody needs a job. Or at least go back to high school.
get a really big towel, cut a hole in it, spend left over money on goon
yup like we been doin for the last fifty years or so …
you will have to prise my dryrobe from my dead frozen digits.
bloody game changer for any1 without a van. so cosy. so smelly. and the camo one is so good for stealth missions to secret spots.
the camo sounds like a rock spiders best friend.
The Trocadero ….. plenty of Ballroom
I got on to my friend who swims sans wetsuit pretty much every day of the year over there. The Irish Sea is warmer in summer, but colder in winter than the Atlantic Ocean. His reply regarding the above article from the Guardian was “ I have been doing the slighting. These dickheads are all obnoxious D4 types that don’t even swim. Stand around drinking lattes not social distancing being pricks. It’s like being back in secondary school. Total status thing.” D4 is a post code in Dublin which has become shorthand for obnoxious posh yuppie posher tosser snobs! The D4 crowd love a bit of rugby!
Fuck em
Just use a banana leaf, bradah
I didnt think the Irish went outside!?
Only the masochists
You’d be surprised , but people who live in shitty , cold climates , go out everyday ( and night in Ireland ) because it is always shit , so they don’t have to check if the weather is good …… Because it never is ! Great don’t give a fuck about the weather cultures in Ireland , Brittany in France and Denmark and Northern Germany too .
The year I lived in Australia I was shocked at how the Aussies took the great weather for granted. I remember one incredible day down in Warnambool, my flatmates were sitting inside watching some shite Australian TV. I was disgusted and went outside to work my sunburn! I have a Brazilian flatmate now, she always looks at me scornfully when I say “it’s a nice day today” – obviously by her standards it’s not!
In Easter 98 I was in Bundoran with my mate who was coaching the Irish Surfing Team and I was talking one night during a lock in with an Irish woman who was so bored shitless in Australia because the dumb fuckers never went out … so she came back and went out every night …
Delivered a parcel to a group of 3 Brazilian girls living in a flat down the beach yesterday. The parcel was one they were expecting and very much looking forward to. It was nice for a moment to have women excited by my presence.
A little film noir
With no one to hate
We humans are most clever
At finding reasons
This story won’t progress but you know what will? WSL fan cam. BG need to upload a video sharing our stoke for WSL. When?
180US$ for a towel coat
Wow
Maybe BG should release a model before Hurluley etc get into the coat towel market…
This brings back fond memories of preVal days.
When one could witness, “Fuck Off SUP cunts” carved into any wooden surface at any parking lot.
As TV Tony [owner diamond head television repair shop] the King of Rice Bowls once told me, “Scuze brah I gots to give birth to a windsurfer …”
Could be worse, the crusty old nude guy, shrivelled up, struggling out of his wetty in the carpark. I do not have a problem with a man in his birth suit, that is until his head is between his knees and his pube infested 3rd eye is staring me down.
LoL mothafucka…
You need more accessories, VONR.
Gotta support the “sport” and the industry!!!!
How primitive we were to use towels to change.
actually it is hilarious how ez it is to get them Hardie wahines buck, just make it about Buddha and they’re down !!!
How fucked up does Ireland sound?
All to surf fickle cold waves and drink warm beer?
Warm beer?
Sounds like Mardi Gras
That was someone’s piss mate
First Donald then Covid, now this.
When will it end!
When common sense prevails?
You mean when it returns
The Don is gone … it was a wild experiment that failed … let it go and move on
Failures what’s coming
Vegas hasn’t paid. That’s all real humans need to know. The rest of u operate off feelings, Vegas operates on cold cash. I’ll wait on their move!
Vegas has been screwing you over for ever … they only gonna pay what you take
I’m a winner, so I’ll explain it in loser terms for you. If Biden “won”, how come NO bookies are paying out?? Because they dont pay until theres a winner. Get prepared to scream at the sky, reeeeeeeeeeeee
Yeah ok, so the bookies call the election now?
Ain’t none of my business bro … it’s your country
Exactly. You guys have some absolutely disgusting politicians. You’ve got your own mess to clean up,….mate.
14 December electoral college votes, bookies pay then.
I know, I’m waiting patiently. Going to get a new Ski/Sled.
Bonne chance.
Plenty of bookies have paid out.
name 1
Smarkets, Bet365, sportsbet, betfred, betvictor…..
Finally, someone is taking on the issues that really matter
Fuck, wait til those Hardies see rinse kits
And Flog Rags ™
Nick Carroll endorsed?
What’s white and crusty?
A flog in a sock.
Wait until some asshat magazine promotes the equivalent of blue crush, and wrecks their whole culture….
These dudes just wanna see some hard nips and small dicks. Is that too much to ask?
I have both of those.
Ohhhh… I like your name. Great but strange artist
I learned at a young and impressionable age to not engage in dry rubbing. Thankfully no hair grew on my palm.