Surfers unexpectedly benefit from effects of climate change once again as new study reveals warmer ocean waters making baby sharks “smaller, undernourished and exhausted!”

Doo, doo, doo, doo, doo, doo...

BeachGrit, as you well know, is an anti-depressive place where lemons are magically turned into lemonade daily. Soul quenching. Take, for example, the specter of zero surf contests from now until next year at this time. We already know how to craft entire narratives around the world’s greatest surfer Kelly Slater that need neither heats nor heat strategy.

Or the horrible nightmare of climate change displacing vast populations, destroying sensitive environments, really being lame. Except here, for us surfers, climate change is making our surf bigger and better and now, as just revealed, making our number one enemy weaker.

New researcher out of Australia examining the effects of warming temperatures on the growth, development and physiology of the Great Barrier Reef’s epaulette sharks found that in warmer waters, shark embryos grew faster and used their yolk sac — their only source of food in this developmental stage — quicker. The man-eaters hatched earlier, were born smaller, and needed to feed straight away, but lacked energy to bite toes, legs, etc.

Jodie Rummer, co-author and associate professor at the ARC Centre of Excellence for Coral Reef Studies, released the following statement regarding the study: “The epaulette shark is known for its resilience to change, even to ocean acidification,” So, if this species can’t cope with warming waters then how will other, less tolerant species fare?”

“The study presents a worrying future given that sharks are already threatened,” lead author Carolyn Wheeler said in another statement, continuing, “Sharks are important predators that keep ocean ecosystems healthy. Without predators, whole ecosystems can collapse, which is why we need to keep studying and protecting these creatures.”

Here’s to the world’s most environmentally damaging person for not only keeping us entertained in these difficult times, but keeping us safe.

Über anti-depressive.