Hard work pays off.
Your BeachGrit is a labor of love and love-adjacent. Every morning, I wake up before the sun, strap on my helmet and head into the surf mines. Deep deep deep down. I set my lunch pail on a pile of dirt and begin picking away at this or that heavily tapped vein, sometimes stumbling upon a new one all shimmery and bright, most often not.
Well after the sun sets, I make my way out of those surf mines, dirty faced, exhausted, giving Derek Rielly a firm handshake as we pass. He set to begin his own shift.
Honest work though rarely glamorous or praiseworthy.
Except for today, for today I was forwarded the latest episode of the Bertcast featuring special guest Nathan Florence.
Vehicle of very funny comedian and inspiration behind National Lampoon’s Van Wilder Bert Kreischer, the Bertcast explores many topics, interesting people, etc. and, again, Nathan Florence.
The two discussed all manner of surfing, life, Hawaii etc. until reaching the end wherein Kreischer begins…
So the last question, I just gotta ask because growing up in Florida I was obsessed, everyone in Florida was obsessed, with Kelly Slater. Gimme a good Kelly Slater story where you just go “Ohhhhh… that’s fuckin’…” or, if you hate him please trash him like that magazine BeachGrit, that fuckin’ magazine BeachGrit hates him. They fuckin’ what the fuck did he do to them?
Honest work sometimes truly and beautifully lauded.
How does Nathan answer?
Watch here.
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Come on it’s not that hard to figure out:
Highly accomplished, graceful surfer. Kelly = yes. BeachGrit = no.
The poor taste to have tattoos = Kelly = no. Beachgrit = yes.
Millionaire. Kelly = many times over. Beachgrit. = not even.
Great at Pipe and better at Backdoor. Kelly = way. Beachgrit = not.
Sideline-sitting, smartass f@##wads who will never live up to their own dreams or expectations.
Kelly = nope. Beachgrit = yep.
Do the math.
Chas, I checked with one of my 10-year-olds… “suck-it” is absolutely a barrel at our local skate park over here at the Jersey Shore…
I think Bert should jump in here from time to time!
Really figure out it’s purely love/hate for the GOAT. Mostly of the giving your friends shit flavour, and love of his online antics and earth destroying wave tech.
Bert’s story about his high school trip to Russia is un-fucking -real. One of the funniest stories I’ve ever heard
The truly Australian way of loving someone is to hate them. That’s why we call our mates cunts
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Microbes found in the goat gut microbiome could help humans convert plant material into valuable, eco-friendly commodities…. thanks Kelly you’ve done it again !
No point watching – it’s not like he is gonna badmouth his father?
I didn’t dare even imply … thanks Foam Lord
Come on we dig Slater , but not as much as we dig taking the piss out of him.
Hating Kelly is way funner than loving him ever was.
Yep and with BG even Heretics ( of the goatly chosen one ) have found a Home .
As we have seen over the years
A good goat is not always good and a bad goat is not always bad ….
There is a devout KS following on the maya gabeira comment section, with many acolites worshipping the bald one. Found it very much counter-culture, or counter-counter-culture.
Just wondering if they are worshipping old Smelly or are they dyed in the wool misogynists …or perhaps both ? Always seems strange how these overtly heterosexual males are afraid of …. women ?
Take a swig everytime Nathan says “like” or “literally”.
Semi-literate god forsaken country.
Semi-literally?
Ain’t the brightest bulb, huh?
I don’t like to assume that, I put it down to a shitload of different cultural things.
Still pretty crap though, makes for tough listening.
Whats the like,story like,with like? My grandaughter,like,says it,like, all the time!
I know I’m old ,but it’s very fucking annoying.
I’ve now watched this whole episode of the Bertcast with Nathan.
Waaay better than the awful snoozefest that Rogan did with Kelly.
And waaaaaaaaay more entertaining than watching that boring as fuck drivel driven Rottnest crap featuring Turdpile and old Lizard lips…
Chas, you can take credit for the commenters’ vilification of pretty much anything & anyone. You feed that fire, fine sir.
What’s Berts relationship to surfing?!?
Similar to the board behind him, a cruiser.
Almost every drunken ex-college boy from Florida has one.
Longtime surfer though and keen as, in other words, a ripping pro compared to Jonah Hill etc…
See “white sal massakre”
Nah
He’s legit
And a decent bloke
Unlike Sal…
A friend ?
Seen him on heaps of stuff for years and he’s always going on about his youthful surfing and skating life growing up in Florida
Thanks BnB
What’s happened to Party Pete ?
I’ll do as he does…
(not really, I’m gonna watch in 2 mins after the J vs J heat)
Still in VIC govt re education camp
To be honest I , think that our Socialist Party Pete would be at home in A HARD LABOR CAMP …. Solidarity Pete !
There’s a magazine too?
Yeah but we only read it for the nude centerfolds and not the articles … or god forbid the comments ?
I’m not going to watch it. What did he say?
I didn’t watch either but teed the vid up for you so you don’t have to search.
My work firewall wouldn’t let it through.
It’s a rough several minutes to watch.
since no-one watched i watched – said nothing – so i turned it off
Thanks. You’re doing Jebus’ work for the team.
The Toms shall inherit the earth …..
Not even the Reader’s Digest condensed milk version ? Nipple fed ?
That’s what I thought but just went back to double check!
Hey chas, completely off topic but why was the Israeli surf league Op-Ed taken down so quickly?
I was enjoying your take
It was taken down? Which one?
“take” sounds like a weekly payment in a brown envelope….