Brazil beware.
The men’s portion of the Michelob ULTRA Pure Gold Haleiwa Challenger has just wrapped and John John Florence, returning from knee injury to the World Surf League stage, smashed the field.
Kanoa Igarashi was in the final, along with a just-qualified Sammy Pupo. Neither Jack Robinson nor The Ultimate Surfer Zeke Lau were.
Florence looked like a proper Championship Tour threat in wonky scary-adjacent Haleiwa, scoring a ten during his domination.
Joe Turpel called the action alongside Makua Rothman, who very much threatened to overshadow the Silk Soy Milk.
Turpel, possibly, worried.
More as the story develops.
I wonder how Cabianca feels about this…
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Hahaha there truly were some awkward moments of silence…but Joe just hops back on the ski every time.
Do we all really believe that John has a full season in him?
I can see a scenario where he wins Pipe and Sunset then permanently fucks off to his honey farm (pot).
Only reappearing as a competitor should Eddie Aikau’s spirit conjure a proper Hawaiian swell at Waimea.
Please, he’s dying to get #3.
Are you sure?
Let’s be honest…John ain’t the competitor that Gabby or Italo are so why do you assume he desperately wants to compete against them, anymore?
Because y’all created this romantic narrative that he doesn’t care about competing , that all he wants is to sail away and grow vegetables and it’s not true whatsoever.
Just recently he has said it in different podcasts that he is, in fact, super competitive and wants to win. He watches the contests even when he’s not in them. Dude even said “I’d be pissed if Gabe won his third title before me.” Just because he’s not cut-throat like Gabe it doesn’t mean he doesn’t want it.
John is the one who created the narrative through his social media posts, etc. so I am not sure why we wouldn’t take him at his word.
Anyway…I personally hope John continues to compete and win world titles.
I’d love to see him win for the next 10 years but I wouldn’t be surprised if he walks away at some point.
I think Gabe is more likely to walk away before John does. John had one injury after the other in the most frustrating possible way. He had every reason to quit then if he wasn’t into it. I guess time will tell.
Hopefully both of them keep competing and alternating world titles.
I liked Longtom’s writeups but his incessant name dropping of Dostoevsky was pretentious AF.
When you spend a lot of time reading dead authors or spend too much money on an impractical education things like Dostoevsky happen.
So impressive that Jack Robbo came 2nd without even being in the final.
Who does that?!?
“Break a leg” Brazo community to JJF
Um, I’m kinda worried bout you Chuck. Maybe you should see a doctor.
Jack Robinson was in the final and runner up to JJF.
Meh. It was a Sunday…a Vodka Soda Sunday™️.
Johnny was off the rocker and gave my wife much pleasure with his BIG SHOW , in the final and I believe she understood perhaps better than the WSL’s international judging roster the comparison between ,him and jack’Robbo’s deep rail power to Kanoa’s skating on the thin ice skating ….but not leaving a trace ….
Ps How the hell did the wonderful Sammy Pupo ( who surfed like a god in the semi ) convince the judges in the 1/4 final 4 to give him a 6.33 and a 4.5 for some of the worst surfing in the entire event …..No Justice IPS ooops ASP ….ooops WSL ……ooops ISA or whoever is the next to take over the role of surfing’s dodgy governing body .
I mowed the rough terrain that we cannot even call a ‘lawn’. The wife described it as “knee-high” and gave me grief for not mowing it weeks ago, yet when I went to look it was barely scratching my ankle. I’m sure there’s a surf metaphor in there somewhere. Our local Grey Butcher Bird (Cracticus torquatus) hopped around me and the third-hand lawnmower, gathering various invertebrates exposed by the whirling blunt excuses for blades. He and his fambly usually come singing for shredded cheese, but I was delighted that I could witness him partaking is a more sustainable, balanced diet.
Eventually I tore the front steel guard off the under-front of the beast by forcing it too hard into the hillside of assorted undergrowth and stones. The blade caught and mangled it until the motor stopped, requiring a surgical removal via delicate application of metal fatigue and swearing. I don’t what that piece was for, but it sure sounds a lot louder without it. A few minutes later a bolt fell out the lower handle, leaving the control of the newly throaty mincer rather dicey on the wet slope. With some stylish body-language, I managed to finesse the final few square meters of ‘grass’ and called it good for a wobbly finish. I have yet to find the bolt, which is certainly the same colour as the majority of the brown detritus under the patch of loquats and Native Frangipani (Hymenosporum flavum – not related to the true Frangipani; Plumeria sp.)
No surfing was witnessed or undertaken at any point in the weekend.
Names may have been changed to protect the innocent.
CB you wonderful kindred spirit you ……If you didn’t exist we , the sisterhood of BG would have to create you …….
Ps Newcastle has more male surfers on tour since JACKO just qualified than …..HAWAII ! all thanks to you CB .
Gettin’ after that grass like Forrest Grump.
Keep ON the Grass!
Haha, mate get a fucking whipper snipper.
This is the best written word published on BeachGrit since LongTom passed. Thoroughly enjoyed.
At least you didn’t cut to an ad break during the final and miss the only 10 point ride of the contest in real time. That would be heinous.
Is the butcher bird into 18 month aged cheddar or is it fine with some tasty cheese? Would also like to hear about it’s thoughts on coon becomming cheer.
8.7
in the excellent range
2ft Hawaiian, 8ft everywhere else in the world. Hard charging CB. Sounds like you need a new Big Lawn gun for those meaty days.
Step-up Mower!
Sounds of summer…better get the cunt fixed real quick or then ya have to tame a real knee high
Nice claim, did the judgesse give you the score?
A good and very relatable read! Get yo self a “Nail buddy” magnet and drag it around where ya mowed to recover the bolt.