“The video ends with the Facebook founder still gliding along triumphantly, his speed barely waning as he maintains his balance on the board."
The American Mark Zuckerberg, not yet forty, founder of Facebook, genius behind a three-D version of the internet called the Metaverse, coming soon if it don’t implode etc, has put the abominable stench of Meta’s crashing share price behind him with a feverish lake-surfing session.
Zuck, whose whose riches have tumbled by almost one hundred billon dollars in the past year sending his ranking among the world’s richest from fifth to eighteen, is filmed hitting boat wake with a very front foot style.
(Oh, how I can relate.)
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Pro surfing BFFs Kanoa Igarashi and Lucas “Chumbo” Chianca were quick to praise, a contrast to the six thousand other mostly unhinged comments begging for money.
“Nice rail work!!” write KI to which 382 fans hit the like button and Zuck replied, “Thanks… big compliment coming from you!”
Pipe stand-out Chumbo writes, “Yeaaahhhhhh” with flame emoji.
“We’ve got to get you out here sometime!” Zuck tells his Brazilian pal.
Other comments were along the lines of,
“Hello everyone, I am poor. My name is Abbas from Iraq. I am 29. I am very tired because I am poor and I want help because I am tired of thinking, depression and deprivation. I have a brother and my father died. My family and I live in poverty because of the conditions of deprivation in my country. It does not help me because the state is militias and gangs that steal human rights. Please help me because I live with my brothers and my mother@zuck”
No response from Zuck at the time of going to press.
Disappointing.
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I’d be a complete cunt just like zuck if I was that rich, actually I am that much of a cunt just not rich. Thanks beachgrit as I come here to realise I’m not the only one
Looks about as exciting as a standing golf wank. Elements of fun but why?
Abbas cadabras!
God, that is one ugly as fuck style.
What a little sook Kanoa is.
Definitely need to surf off your front foot a bit on that wake bollocks though. It gets boring v quickly.
Hey Abbas, what you need to do mate, is get your mum to move your fams (you) to the US. You can then learn to surf slop, dominate the NSSA, WQS, make the CT. By the time you’ve nailed that, you can then surf for Iraq in the lympics.
That, or get a fucking job mate. Stop whinging.
Here is some praise. You are obviously a late learner who hasn’t skated a day in your life.
Concrete is too hard
Rich twat wouldn’t like that much
Safer behind boat
Kanoa really isnt on our side is he
It’s REALLY gonna be on when Kanoa teaches our hero here how to claim.
Makes me think about the friends I could have if I was rich
Here I thought we were only one Saudi oil tycoon with a wave pool in their backyard away from a radical world tour. Mark Zuckerberg’s ripping.
Musk and Bezos want to get to space, Zuckerberg wants to get to barrels.
You got to take a long look in the mirror if you decide to like or comment on anything this d bag posts.
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Smelly wants in fer sure!
He better have thick skin, a perverted sense of reality and a willingness to explore his transgender feelings due to the nature of BG’s current thematic efforts…BTW is there a wave pool near where he lives?
If anyones in Melbourne this Thursday, I have a couple of spare tix to a show that will let you question your sexuality for a night at least.
WHOA Pete! Let us know if you have any takers and maybe BG will let you write an article about the event BUT be ready to weave in something about surfing, KS and Zuck
I have an angle
Still waiting!
Well muscled man in eye makeup wearing combo pouch gstring in gold practically surfs giant fishbowl spinning his bare arse for audience in early scene of the Melbourne spectacular show of epic proportions enjoyed by Party Pete last night. Show is moving onto surfings original home in Australia, Sydney, next month playing in a building reminiscent of marching waves enjoyed by surfers the world over, the Sydney Opera House.
The lyrics from Gaucho could tie in very well with this twisted, sordid efforts:
Who is the gaucho, amigo?
Why is he standing in your spangled leather poncho
And your elevator shoes?
Bodacious cowboys
A colleague told me I stink of booze when she walked into the office this morning.
Did you offer to take her out for a morning cocktail?
Ben Gravy better watch out – Zuck is coming into his lane!
Catch Book
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I’m guessing Sasha would hit that all day long after giving Zuck the surf lesson of a lifetime!
Bloke blowing it, loses 200 billion $$$ just so he can pretend to be a surfer.
The classic curse is once his broke, no surfer would piss on him let alone acknowledge him in the lineup 😂
All that money and such a small wake. If I was that rich my boat wake would be flooding residents houses.
Fuckkkk that, I’d be doing helicopter towins and blowing neighbour roofs off!
That’s because you feel inferior, once you got rich you might not be so bitter any more
“If you had all the money in the world, would you still do the job you have? If yes, you truly love it.”
So tell us, Negs–besides having big boat wake, would you also be moderating BG delinquents down here?
Good chance I wouldn’t even have the internet.
No porn?!?
You have no idea how the elite roll. Think Epsteins Island but with waves and no minors.
Epsteins Bluff
This is how we roll
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Would you have midget’s packing you cones and waxing your sled?
Apparently Zuck is doing a edit with Ben gravy soon, it’s going to be tanker soft top hydro foiling. Look out Kai Lenny the zuck and gravy train are coming for you
All because some dork couldn’t get any trim in college.
Still can’t
That should be carved in marble and read in centuries to come.
Nice rail work Dezza!
Put a wig on him and it could be Tatty at G-Land…
Abbas should have just complimented the man’s rail work and waited for his plane tickets to Maui to arrive in the mail.
That’s def the trending protocol amongst these elite have-it-all’s except Abbas know that falsehood is a forbidden act causing extreme displeasure of Allah.
Abbas might have too much integrity