Big, big trouble.

The island nation of England is waking up this morning to a scandal so sticky, so damning, that its sort has not been seen since Rupert Murdoch tapped royal phones and had a little listen in. A bit of eavesdrop and biscuits. Nasty business. The epicenter of these troubles happen to be Cornwall, there on the pendulum’s western bit, where “Operation Surfwell” has been uncovered by a rightly furious wife.

Per Cornwall Live:

With Cornish householders paying extra council tax to fund policing and officer numbers still not back to their pre-austerity level, a policeman’s wife has voiced her horror at discovering ten full-time officers are being funded to run surfing lessons rather than fight crime – at a potential cost to the public of more than £450,000 a year.

A response to her Freedom of Information (FOI) request revealed that ‘Operation Surfwell’, which offers surfing as therapy for emergency services personnel and has been running for three years, cost £68,348 in 2021-22, exclusive of staffing costs – likely to be a further £400,000-plus. Roughly half the bill was met from the force budget and the rest from grants (£32,382) and income from running courses (£5,530).

Ten full-time ‘sworn or warranted’ staff are assigned to the project, with a further five performing a “resilience function” on a limited number of days. Devon and Cornwall Police describes this as “a reallocation of resources” rather than an additional cost. Surfwell, which was first set up in Devon and Cornwall in 2020, was extended to the rest of England and Wales last year because it has proved its worth in helping officers and other emergency services workers overcoming trauma and become better officers for it.

The wife went on to say, “My husband is a police officer who’s constantly under pressure due to lack of staff and being run between job and job. He told me about Op Surfwell, which is a mental heath surf programme set up by the force, but I was disgusted to know that regular police officers have been taken off frontline duties to surf when I believe something like this could be outsourced.”

Or not outsourced. Just scrapped altogether.

It is too early to know if the calumny will be enough to sink the new Rishi Sunak government.

Dark days.

World Surf League remains a bastion of freedom.

Days ago, the International Surfing Association, recognized governing body for Olympic surfing, released its official policy regarding transgender athletes participation in contests that read thusly:

A surfer assigned male at birth – and/or – who identifies as a man and has man/male on his national identity card or passport is eligible to compete in a men’s event or as a man in a mixed event;

A surfer assigned female at birth – and/or – who identifies as a woman and has woman/female on her national identity card or passport is eligible to compete in a woman’s event or as a woman in a mixed event;

A surfer assigned male at birth who identifies as a woman and has woman/female on her national identity card or passport is eligible to compete in a men’s event or as a man in a mixed event if she has not met the requirements to compete in a woman’s event (such as maintaining testosterone level less than 5 nmol/l continuously for the previous 12 months);

A surfer assigned male at birth who identifies as a woman and has man/male or “other” or “X” on their national identity card or passport is eligible to compete in a men’s event or as a man in a mixed event;

In order to compete in a woman’s event or as a woman in a mixed event, where either:

A surfer who was assigned male at birth and whose gender has changed and identifies as a woman – and/or has woman/female, “other” or “X” – on her national identity card or passport;

or

The athlete has otherwise been required by the executive committee and/or medical commission to establish eligibility to compete in a women’s event;The athlete must satisfy the ISA medical commission that her serum testosterone concentration has been less than 5 nmol/L continuously for the previous 12 months and meets any other requirements reasonably set by the executive committee and/or medical commission.

Of most note, I suppose, is the bit about testosterone levels.

According to The Inertia, these guidelines are “liberal” compared to other sport governing bodies. Or, rather, other sport governing bodies not named World Surf League which continues to have no policy at all.

Oh, you certainly remember the thrill brought to so many when Australia’s Sasha Jane Lowerson went on an incredible winning streak, taking prestigious longboarding contest after prestigious longboarding contest.

She became the first transgender surfer to ever win an event, much less multiple, and all seemed bright aside from the snark.

The World Surf League, I suppose, now a bastion of gender freedom as compared to the ISA.

Who would have thought?