Fanning (left) and Slater. Stars on the rise. Photo: WSL
Fanning (left) and Slater. Stars on the rise. Photo: WSL

Kelly Slater, Mick Fanning to star as alter-egos of futuristic selves in off-beat adult comedy titled “The Greatest Surf Movie in the Universe!”

Thor's brother too!

I bet that was not news you were expecting to lead your surf-centric morning. Bet, heavily, that the names Kelly Slater and Mick Fanning were not bouncing around in your noggin attached to phrases like “alter-egos of futuristic selves,” “off-beat adult comedy,” or “The Greatest Surf Movie in the Universe” but that’s what’s great about waking up or, in the parlance of football, “why we play the game.”

Per film industry source Deadline:

Australia-based Bronte Pictures has signed a sales deal with Archstone Entertainment for three new projects, which will be launched at this week’s EFM in Berlin.

The Greatest Surf Movie In The Universe is set to star Luke Hemsworth (Westworld), eleven-time world surfing champion Kelly Slater (Baywatch) and three-time world champion surfer and shark attack survivor Mick Fanning as their futuristic alter-egos. The off-beat adult comedy will include stop motion animation characters.

I told you.

“Stop motion animation characters” too.

And this may answer percolating questions about Slater’s future. The 11x world champion is currently sitting equal 17th, heading to a wave he actively dislikes before a finicky Portugal, fat Bells then Margaret River and the mid-season cut. Will he make it? After his lousy Pipe performance, things are not looking good and I was wondering what was next.

A return to acting (Baywatch) makes all the sense in the world.

But do you think Mick Fanning like’s “shark attack survivor” as his handle?

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toaster redux
toaster redux
3 years ago

Is Mick really a shark attack survivor?

Lairds biome
Lairds biome
3 years ago

Gary Busey just puked

tim_nelsen
tim_nelsen
3 years ago

we’re a

small testing

clinic

tim_nelsen
tim_nelsen
3 years ago

negs…911

Hippy
Hippy
3 years ago

The real question Chas is how will Film fuck up surfing again?

When Point Break is your high water mark….. ?

channelbottom
channelbottom
3 years ago
tim_nelsen
tim_nelsen
3 years ago
Reply to  channelbottom

father, son, and fanning

Manuka
Manuka
3 years ago

And socks

Sean Connery
Sean Connery
3 years ago

It’s amazing he gets any acting jobs after that Kona beer commercial.

Abscessed Llama
Abscessed Llama
3 years ago

I Can assure you think about Ke11y way more than I do. Totally bored by him unless it’s 8′ plus and heaving!

tim_nelsen
tim_nelsen
3 years ago

“descent showing today” Siskel

Ebert?

Abscessed Llama
Abscessed Llama
3 years ago
Reply to  tim_nelsen

“He looked loose for sure. Five fins! Dude’s channelling Davey Miller.” Ebert

tim_nelsen
tim_nelsen
3 years ago

I know D. Miller. sold him spirulina, back when I was a health guru. he’s thanked me ever since. artist, musician, surfer, former addict. VTA boy rode Sunset as I peeked over his shoulder playing Super 8 mm film at Dexters Camera

Jimmy the Saint
Jimmy the Saint
3 years ago

Does Alter-ego of futuristic self imply an alternative history? Where maybe instead of focusing on surfing and ignoring quarantine guidelines during a pandemic lockdown, Slater went to medical school and educated himself before deciding he was informed enough to give his opinions publicly on the efficacy of specific vaccines?

tim_nelsen
tim_nelsen
3 years ago

norwegian wood?

astro
astro
3 years ago

Something new I won’t ever watch.

Mapski
Mapski
3 years ago

Who gets the stalker cameo?

Eesha Williams
Eesha Williams
3 years ago
Reply to  Mapski

ELO

c4
c4
3 years ago
Reply to  Mapski

I can picture Keala Kennelly ringing a doorbell with a steak knife in her hand.

Manuka
Manuka
3 years ago
Reply to  c4

Or JMD, with a steak.

channelbottom
channelbottom
3 years ago
Reply to  Manuka

Do you mean a stake, in a donut franchise?

Com Turren
Com Turren
3 years ago

And a little more investigative research would have revealed the IMDB plot summary:

It’s been 10 years since a deadly virus has wiped out a lot of the global population. In the rush to save humanity, Dr John Fig fast tracks an experimental vaccine which becomes mandatory in every country around the world. The vaccine works, however there is one terrible side effect, the injection instantly erases the ability to surf and any memory of surfing altogether. It’s a strange and abstract time as the World’s Best Surfers stumble blindly into new lives and careers oblivious to the incredible talents they once possessed. Sensing the total extinction of wave riding, the surf God, Hughey, makes a last-ditch effort to save surfing. He scours the globe until, high on a mountain top in Tibet, he finds the one man capable of bringing surfing back from the dead. With his memory reinstated by Hughie, it’s now up to the three Time World Champion Surfer Mick Fanning to recruit a team of the world’s best surfers (including Craig Anderson, Mason Ho, Griffin Colapinto, Jack Freestone,Matt Wilkinson & feat. Kelly Slater) and restore the glory of surfing back into public consciousness. There’s only one way to do it and that’s to make… THE BEST SURF MOVIE IN THE UNIVERSE

c4
c4
3 years ago
Reply to  Com Turren

Thought you made that up at first. It’s for real.

Com Turren
Com Turren
3 years ago
Reply to  c4

If I had written it, Dr. John Fig would have been portrayed by Griff, because the notion of someone possessing his IQ ever being a physician is about the most far-fetched thing I can think of

M.
M.
3 years ago
Reply to  c4

Wait, what?

c4
c4
3 years ago
Reply to  M.

That’s the actual plot summary.

M.
M.
3 years ago
Reply to  c4

But… I mean… Why?

tim_nelsen
tim_nelsen
3 years ago
Reply to  Com Turren

Harbor is closed Tomas…

don’t test us!

frank
frank
3 years ago

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