Rage boils over in Australian surf town Byron Bay as pro surfer reveals long road to recovery following collision with adult learner’s leashless longboard, “Byron Bay is a glittering dream metastasized into a malignant nightmare!”

"The girl says her legrope broke but CLEARLY there is a massive issue in our town with people not wearing them."

The ongoing battle between VALS living the retro-nostalgia dream of riding leashless logs in crowded lineups and regular joes wanting to swish around on a few waves without being decapitated continues following the near-death of pro surfer Matt Cassidy at Wategos a few days back.

Cassidy, who is forty-nine, in his own words, “nearly bled out on the beach and nearly lost my arm when someone dropped in one me out two-foot Wategos without a legrope. After an hour on the beach being held together by some absolutely legendary humans I was rushed via ambulance then helicopter to GC where I’m currently awaiting specialist advice.”

In a post yesterday, Cassidy gave an update on his condition, thrilled, obviously, surgeons weren’t forced to amputate his arm thanks to quick-thinking spectators using a legrope for a tourniquet.

“I am at home now and they’ve managed to save the arm. We aren’t sure of the extent of the injury long term but I’ll attack rehab the same way I do everything else. • With everything I’ve got. It’s an emotional time and I just want to take a second to address the girl involved in this horrible accident.
I hold you no bad will, I saw your face on the beach and I have no doubt you have learned a lesson. You have my total forgiveness and compassion as long as you practice safe surf etiquette for the rest of your surfing life.

I’d ask the community to do the same in regards to her but let’s continue the surf safety conversation this accident has started. We clearly need better education and management in the surf.

If three things can come out of this I’d wish they be these:

1. I get full use of my arm back so I can surf again.

2. That people look on the inside twice before even paddling for a wave. Kids look both ways before they even step onto a road to cross it, the surf should be no different.

3. As I’ve stated, I’ll accept that the girl says her legrope broke but CLEARLY there is a massive issue in our town with people not wearing them. Read the comments around my injury posts, there’s been a litany of injuries to children, wives, mothers, husbands, partners from people losing their boards because they are too egotistical to wear a safety device. Please let’s get this mandated and back it up with strong education.”

 

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Question: is it ever acceptable in these busy days to surf leashless and, further, what do you think goes through the mind of anyone taking a log to a crowded lineup sans leash?

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Disappointment as lavish surf retreat of Red Hot Chilli Peppers’ surfer-bass-player “Flea”, built amid secluded sand dunes on remote Australian coastline, sells for half-a-million dollars less than price guide!

"You will love spending your time just relaxing in a spot that is virtually unknown except to the very very lucky few."

The bass-player-cum-clown of funk-rock act The Red Hot Chilli Peppers, a first-class band with a savage vitality that was formed in Los Angeles in 1982 and has shifted 120 million records over thirty years, has sold his beachfront compound on NSW’s far south coast, a joint designed for the express purpose of Keeping the Master Happy At His Work; or, more bluntly, indulging the small child that lurks within every creative man.

The Australian-born Flea, lesser known as sixty-year-old Michael Balzary from Melbourne, bought the half-acre beachfront spread at 775 Congo Road, Congo, five hours drive south of Sydney and halfway to the Victorian border, almost thirty years ago in 1994.

Flea and New Zealand architect Malcolm Cheadle designed the five-bedder with the roof designed to look like a cuttlefish and with wooden floors sourced from the old Parliament House in near-ish by Canberra.

“It has a rock-star vibe to it but also a relaxed holiday feeling that is really suited to the village of Congo,” selling agent James Hamilton said.“Flea has written a lot of music at the property and has had band members, jamming in what was the music room downstairs. It has a contemporary Californian design that sprawls out towards the ocean with amazing views and really compliments the natural environment.”

(Ed’s note: A subsequent email from the architect’s daughter Paloma said “an incredible team of craftsmen came together to build that house. That stunning copper staircase was made by a Calabrian blacksmith from Sydney Francesco Petrolo.” Also RHCP-adjacent is Malcolm Cheadle’s relationship with the band’s frontman Anthony Keidis.  “Anthony seemed to have a very natural, energetic fit with New Zealand. They spent quite a bit of time searching for the perfect coastal site on the Coromandel peninsula, but Anthony ended up buying the property on the Kaipara that he wrote about in his autobiography.”)

Shoot hoops tween surfs.

If you’d peeled open the marketing brochure you’d learn the place was,

“Situated in Congo on 2946sqm (approx. half an acre) of land and bordering National Park on one side and beach on the other, you will love spending your time, just relaxing in a spot that is virtually unknown except to the very very lucky few. The custom-designed home opens to a magnificent entry with a bespoke spiral copper and steel staircase connecting two double-storey wings. Beautifully maintained, the property has undergone extensive updates over the past years. Its features include an open fireplace with stone detailing and a master retreat featuring a luxe ensuite with a mosaic-tiled plunge bath. Bi-fold doors open to an alfresco terrace with views across the property. There is also a multipurpose sports court.”

With a price guide of three-million Australian dollars, a sale figure somewhat north of that was expected despite Australia’s plunging property market.

However, you get what you get, and when you remove the rabid desperation of a housing bubble, which ended six months ago, buyers become remarkably subdued.

After a little to-ing and fro-ing, 775 Congo Road, sold for $2.475 million, Australian dollars, one point seven US.

A screaming bargain.

 

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Violent debate rages after World Surf League unveils extremely controversial Hurley Pro Sunset Beach artwork!

"Woaahhh when do we know the line up for the festival? Only djs or we also have bands?"

The Hurley Pro Sunset Beach opens its window in exactly one day and seventeen minutes, at time of writing, and the outlook is not out-looking great. Surfline, the World Surf League’s official forecast partner, is predicting double overhead surf tomorrow which fades through midweek and gets chewed up by various winds and whatnots. Kai Lenny, as you certainly know, is one of the wildcards and birthday boy Kelly Slater will be up against his nemesis Miguel Pupo in heat seven.

And while the attention of surf fans should be clearly and cleanly locked into the other heat draws, it is being spent either defending or slandering the extremely controversial artwork rolled out in celebration of the event.

@tom_rix declared, “I like the design. MR get a wildcard?”

@egas_eymael stated, “are we going psychedelic? ok then” adding three discos dancers even though the design is neither psychedelic nor disco.

@_hvoide thought, “Should have had the design show howling winds blowing the lineup to bits.”

@odigitalsurf wondered, “Woaahhh when do we know the line up for the festival? Only djs or we also have bands?”

But where do you stand re. it?

Loving the retro or… not?

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Church bells peal as world’s greatest surfer Kelly Slater turns 51!

Where would we be without him?

Today, February 11, is Kelly Slater’s 51st birthday. Last year, on his 50th, he was fresh off a Pro Pipeline win, wearing the yellow jersey and feted by World Surf League executives across multiple blue checked Instagram accounts. This year, he is equal 17th heading into Sunset and there appears to be no official love or recognition, leaving the door wide open for this community, here, to show that we are with the Florida born legend through thick and thin.

Do you have plans on how you will celebrate the milestone?

A nice cold Michelob Ultra and contraband burrito?

Some special time online getting cooked?

Gathering the family around the high definition television to watch Kelly Slater in Kolor?

Let me make that easy for you.

However you decide to honor the day, please share in the comments below so that we can do a better job on his 52nd.

Here’s to you, Kelly.

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Chief of Sport Jessi Miley-Dyer (rear) and Chief of Executives Erik Logan (fore) being silly. (Bethany Hamilton insert). Photo: What's Up Doc?
Chief of Sport Jessi Miley-Dyer (rear) and Chief of Executives Erik Logan (fore) being silly. (Bethany Hamilton insert). Photo: What's Up Doc?

World Surf League appears to troll Bethany Hamilton, posts official “men’s championship tour rankings” after Pro Pipeline as 1) Carissa Moore, 2) Tyler Wright, 3) Lakey Peterson and so on!

You can't script this!

The World Surf League is known for many things included, but not limited to, hosting professional surfing competitions, employing Joe Turpel, being owned by Harvey Weinstein pal Dirk Ziff, having a “Chief of Sport” etc. Generally not included in that list is “having a sense of humor” though it appears one might be blossoming in the aftermath of Bethany Hamilton-gate.

As you know, the world’s best known surfer took to Instagram, less than a week ago, to decry a change in World Surf League policy allowing for transgender women to compete at the very highest level. Hamilton’s impassioned questioning about why the move was done in secrecy, if any of the tour’s current surfers have been consulted etc. has since gone viral with mainstream headlines picking it up and progressive TikTokers fighting back by enlisting sharks as allies.

Culture World War III.

The League, though, has been deathly silent and I took that as rabid petrification amongst proudly awake executives who didn’t know if they should sacrifice women or other women. But could I have been wrong?

Might Santa Monica have been stealthily crafting the most subtle joke ever?

For hours ago, 22 at time of writing, the official WSL Twitter account tweeted the “Men’s Championship Tour Rankings after the #BillabongProPipeline” as 1) Carissa Moore, 2) Tyler Wright, 3) Lakey Peterson etc. etc. etc.

Ha!

No?

David Lee Scales and I discussed the Hamilton v. WSL business, anyhow, on our weekly chat that went on for a surprisingly long time. I think you just might find as humorous as Jessi Miley-Dyer, Erik Logan and gang.

I don’t know who that gang is and also take it back.

Nothing is as funny.

Listen here.

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