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Billionaire Facebook founder Mark Zuckerberg successfully overturns ref's decision in jiujitsu contest and, inset, former BFF Kai Lenny.

Surfer and combat sports enthusiast Mark Zuckerberg accused of cheating and throwing tantrum in wild showdown at debut jiujitsu contest!

“You take some head blows along the way!”

The fight world was cock-a-hoop yesterday following Mark Zuckerberg’s domination of a jiujitsu contest where the Facebook founder and part-owner of Instagram won gold and silver medals competing in the Gi and non-Gi divisions.

A who’s who of the fight world were quick to dive onto Zuck’s snorkel, including UFC champs Brandon Moreno, Alex Volkanovski and Izzy Adesanya.

It was a long way from his hard-core big-wave sessions on Maui with one-time BFF Kai Lenny that had become so full-on they tested, he said, his very mortality.

“I do a fair amount of, like, extreme sport type stuff so I’m definitely aware of (my mortality),” Zuck told podcaster Lex Friedman. “I train hard. So if I’m gonna go out in a 15-foot wave then I’ll make sure we have the right safety gear, make sure I’m used to that spot and all that stuff…(But) you take some head blows along the way.”

After an almost uniformly positive response to his success on the mat yesterday, the billionaire following fellow celebrity Tom Hardy into the competitive jiujitsu game, footage has emerged of Zuckerberg appearing to argue a decision in his gi match and, later, pulling on his opponent’s elastic yoga pants in the no-gi roll.

Real hard to tell from the footy taken from the back row but looks like his opponent tries to cross-collar choke the billionaire from Zuck’s closed guard, a classic white belt move that works often enough at the lower levels, either that or he stacks him on his neck, Zuck taps, fight stops, Zuck says he didn’t tap, fight gets recast as a draw, something y’don’t often see in the jiujitsu game.

And, in his no-gi brawl, Zuck starts tearing hell out of his opponent’s plastic tee and pants before the ref pulls him into line.

No comment yet from Kai Lenny who has previously described Zuckerberg as “really cool” and “Super fit. Like … strong, strong strong. Physically strong.”

Mark Zuckerberg SHOCKS Competition at Jiu-Jitsu Tournament
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John Non John

Kai will tow in Conan Hayes to investigate

Urchin Sepsis

Zuk should just grabbed his opponent by the pussy. He’s famous after all. Fortunately or unfortunately. He can spare 5 mil.

Beef & Beer

Zuck does Jewjitsu
But not as good as Jonah
Though better than Dez
https://uploads.disquscdn.c…

AI (for ever) .

I lost all respect for jitsoui when Tudor outed slater for just wearing any belt he wanted

Sean Connery

Probably has them all hanging up in his closet. Chooses color based on how he feels that day. When he is feeling down he chooses purple.

Durban Poison

And yet another irreverent ‘surf adjacent’ BG piece to fill space and keep up clicks. Fuck jiu jitsoui, which may well be the preferred homoerotic pastime of a few surfers but is really just as irrelevant as golf when it comes to the core surf culture we are supposedly seeking out here.

NEGATRON

When push comes to shove, knowing how to putt a ball into a hole vs choking out someone is very different on the irrelevance scale.

Derek Hynd's Missing Fins

DR, on Zuck golfing: Zuck took his 4 wood shaft and slowly extracted it from the dark depths of his bag. The tee was spiked into the fertile soil. His swing was all hips and thrust. Contact was quick, decisive, no foreplay needed. The hole was plumbed, and the shaft returned to its stupor and slumber. Oh yeah, Zuck has surfer friends and lives in opulence on Maui, which has waves.

Durban Poison

Absolutely but I mentioned the irreverence/irrelevance specifically in relation to surfing, where putting or choking have no place.

Sean Connery

Golf is a great way to ruin a nice walk

tim_nelsen

ad-adjacent…Mom threatened to throw me out on a curb if i ever hung up the phone on her again. she’s about 4’8′ and 80 pounds. about the same size as Zuck!

Dogsnuts

It’s hard to jack off to but still possible xox

tim_nelsen

bought the rainbow bridge dvd only to find out it can’t rewind backwards…

Stick man

Tengo VHS…

tim_nelsen

how’d it rate?

Stick man

Drags on a bit but the Hendrix cameos, surfing and drug scenes , plus the concert at the end make it a must see! Probably not on Netflix…

tim_nelsen

I’ll trade up the worthless DVD for ur VHS. I’ll order another based on ur recommendation.

tim_nelsen

no increase in menu sales…

am just feedin myself…

canadian salmon…and bagels/

oh well…

rattle snake shake \

Urchin Sepsis

Definitely not California salmon. Criminally incompetent resource managers.

tim_nelsen

canadian fresh farm-raised…open ocean floating nets with artificial feed pellets?

JOB's second chin

Oh wow, a know egotistical sociopath cheated at something? Next you’ll tell me he may have done some shady things when he started Facebook.

Dogsnuts

So forgive me because I’m learning, but jiu jitsoui is like soft gay pornography right?

The Bitchy Crab

Like frottage with straight face!

Dogsnuts

Oh gosh, I have no poker face. I’d be awful. *bits lip

K0o_o0K

incredible vocab

tim_nelsen

Is that Emerald City in the background or am I in a proper surf contest stupor?

Stick man

Surfer’s Parasite

ValiantScorn

The girls I went to high school in 80’s would have instigated a fight to shut him up. I miss then, they lost themselves along the way

Otto

Gi wiz, he probably cheated playing Dungeons and Dragons too.

Abscessed Llama

Special 94 sided dice made..

Huckleberry

Lol. I believe it.


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