“You take some head blows along the way!”
The fight world was cock-a-hoop yesterday following Mark Zuckerberg’s domination of a jiujitsu contest where the Facebook founder and part-owner of Instagram won gold and silver medals competing in the Gi and non-Gi divisions.
A who’s who of the fight world were quick to dive onto Zuck’s snorkel, including UFC champs Brandon Moreno, Alex Volkanovski and Izzy Adesanya.
It was a long way from his hard-core big-wave sessions on Maui with one-time BFF Kai Lenny that had become so full-on they tested, he said, his very mortality.
“I do a fair amount of, like, extreme sport type stuff so I’m definitely aware of (my mortality),” Zuck told podcaster Lex Friedman. “I train hard. So if I’m gonna go out in a 15-foot wave then I’ll make sure we have the right safety gear, make sure I’m used to that spot and all that stuff…(But) you take some head blows along the way.”
After an almost uniformly positive response to his success on the mat yesterday, the billionaire following fellow celebrity Tom Hardy into the competitive jiujitsu game, footage has emerged of Zuckerberg appearing to argue a decision in his gi match and, later, pulling on his opponent’s elastic yoga pants in the no-gi roll.
Real hard to tell from the footy taken from the back row but looks like his opponent tries to cross-collar choke the billionaire from Zuck’s closed guard, a classic white belt move that works often enough at the lower levels, either that or he stacks him on his neck, Zuck taps, fight stops, Zuck says he didn’t tap, fight gets recast as a draw, something y’don’t often see in the jiujitsu game.
And, in his no-gi brawl, Zuck starts tearing hell out of his opponent’s plastic tee and pants before the ref pulls him into line.
No comment yet from Kai Lenny who has previously described Zuckerberg as “really cool” and “Super fit. Like … strong, strong strong. Physically strong.”
Commented on Disqus? Log out, tap the Disqus button, and your old name and comments come back. The box is ours.
Your comments are still here. Every one of them.
Twelve years of BeachGrit comments came across from Disqus. Connect and we will show you how many are yours. We get your username, nothing else.
Connect Disqus to reveal.
Kai will tow in Conan Hayes to investigate
Zuk should just grabbed his opponent by the pussy. He’s famous after all. Fortunately or unfortunately. He can spare 5 mil.
Zuck does Jewjitsu
But not as good as Jonah
Though better than Dez
https://uploads.disquscdn.c…
I lost all respect for jitsoui when Tudor outed slater for just wearing any belt he wanted
Probably has them all hanging up in his closet. Chooses color based on how he feels that day. When he is feeling down he chooses purple.
And yet another irreverent ‘surf adjacent’ BG piece to fill space and keep up clicks. Fuck jiu jitsoui, which may well be the preferred homoerotic pastime of a few surfers but is really just as irrelevant as golf when it comes to the core surf culture we are supposedly seeking out here.
When push comes to shove, knowing how to putt a ball into a hole vs choking out someone is very different on the irrelevance scale.
DR, on Zuck golfing: Zuck took his 4 wood shaft and slowly extracted it from the dark depths of his bag. The tee was spiked into the fertile soil. His swing was all hips and thrust. Contact was quick, decisive, no foreplay needed. The hole was plumbed, and the shaft returned to its stupor and slumber. Oh yeah, Zuck has surfer friends and lives in opulence on Maui, which has waves.
Absolutely but I mentioned the irreverence/irrelevance specifically in relation to surfing, where putting or choking have no place.
Golf is a great way to ruin a nice walk
ad-adjacent…Mom threatened to throw me out on a curb if i ever hung up the phone on her again. she’s about 4’8′ and 80 pounds. about the same size as Zuck!
It’s hard to jack off to but still possible xox
bought the rainbow bridge dvd only to find out it can’t rewind backwards…
Tengo VHS…
how’d it rate?
Drags on a bit but the Hendrix cameos, surfing and drug scenes , plus the concert at the end make it a must see! Probably not on Netflix…
I’ll trade up the worthless DVD for ur VHS. I’ll order another based on ur recommendation.
no increase in menu sales…
am just feedin myself…
canadian salmon…and bagels/
oh well…
rattle snake shake \
Definitely not California salmon. Criminally incompetent resource managers.
canadian fresh farm-raised…open ocean floating nets with artificial feed pellets?
Oh wow, a know egotistical sociopath cheated at something? Next you’ll tell me he may have done some shady things when he started Facebook.
So forgive me because I’m learning, but jiu jitsoui is like soft gay pornography right?
Like frottage with straight face!
Oh gosh, I have no poker face. I’d be awful. *bits lip
incredible vocab
Is that Emerald City in the background or am I in a proper surf contest stupor?
Surfer’s Parasite
The girls I went to high school in 80’s would have instigated a fight to shut him up. I miss then, they lost themselves along the way
Gi wiz, he probably cheated playing Dungeons and Dragons too.
Special 94 sided dice made..
Lol. I believe it.