"You have a disease known as Angry Old Gringo Syndrome that afflicts surfers who've been forced to watch Griffin and Kelly lose too many times."
The World Surf League, still staggering over the recent Surf Ranch Pro PR disaster where three Brazilian world champs publicly lambasted the organisation for poor judging, has become embroiled in a new contretemps after a surf fan posted his racist theory on Brazil’s recent dominance of the tour.
user112345567, who has zero followers and who self-identifies as Joe Schmo Average White Guy, writes:
“Quick history lesson. When you take an oppressed racial minority and let them compete against rich, privileged, racist White people what happens? Hint: The White people lose every time. You can see this in the NBA, NFL, MLB, Boxing, Track and Field and now surfing. Except in surfing it’s Brazilians not Blacks. White people don’t have the hunger, the drive, the motivation and the anger that an oppressed minority has bottled up inside them. When you are given everything, you have nothing to gain. That is why whites can’t win and will never be great athletes.”
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When surf fans lunged at the bait, Joe Schmo doubled down.
“Kelly slater has double the world titles of brazil,” wrote Caleb Miller.
Schmo replied, “The NBA was all white before they finally let Blacks in. Now it’s 72.3% Black. Same concept. Different Sport.”
“The wsl never kept brazil out of competition there just was never a good enough surfer from brazil to compete at the time,” replied Miller.
Schmo, “You’re missing the point. It took Blacks time to catch up and finally surpass Whites at Basketball and it will take time for Brazil to surpass Whites at surfing but make no mistake it is happening.”
thats_what_you_git hit back, “Yet another L #troll
Schnmo, “@thats_what_you_git Hi, I’m Dr. Schmo, based on your symptoms I believe you have the very common disease known as “Angry Old Gringo Syndrome” that tends to afflict Southern California surfers who have been forced to watch Griffin and Kelly lose too many times. Sadly there is no cure for the disease which gets progressively worse over time as Brazil wins more and more world titles but I suggest driving more on the gridlocked freeway and surfing crowded summertime Lowers as much as you can to alliviate your anger and frustration.”
Apart from Italo’s well-catalogued humble beginnings learning to surf on a cooler lid and daddy selling fish to beachfront restaurants etc, Filipe and Gabriel appear to’ve come from relatively middle-class and, likely, European Portuguese stock which negates the “oppressed racial minority” line.
Or no?
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brazilians vs whites hahaha that’s funny
Sunny Garcia
BUT is Elo going to tattoo that Brazil event poster on his chest?
with a fully boozed-up Yeti cooler attached to a trailing skateboard and selling beer to the beach crowd? (beats tossing fishwraps on a route) rich? no?
having no bills and kids are on their own…priceless!
“my dad beat my mom and I’m the alcoholic…” “my Mom’s lesbian galpal raped me…” “the beach was my only escape from the insanity of the city…” “my first vinyl record was Black Sabbath…” “Nixon, Kennedy, Obama, Trump…”
This event poster really captures the spirit of the fans.
All the smiling Brazilian faces on the beach, cheering their favorites and sporting official WSL rashies.
Peering deeper into this surfing utopia, however, paints a a very different picture.
The fans hold “World Shame League” signs. A lone gunman crouches high on the balcony of a Rio apartment complex, peering intently through the scope of a long-range sniper rifle at Australian Ethan Ewing, ready to calmly squeeze the trigger as one of the shameful gringo judges rewards him with a 9.07 instead of 8.70.
In the background, behind a drawn curtain, a middle-aged man hunches over a laptop, furiously jabbing the keys into the comment box of “instagram.com/ericklogan/“
Shame Elo wasn’t in the Titanic submarine 🫣
His family was still spitting dirt out of their mouths somewhere on an Indian reservation near Tulsa.
Cmon, an article about a comment in Instagram as if it had created any fuzz at all. Keep the great journalism 🤣
Rio Waida surfs really good
People are not “created” equal. Intellect, body habitus, strength vary by individual and race. Motivation, however, knows no socioeconomic boundaries.
ADS was from the favela.
Gabe was poor though not as poor as Italo. His mom cleaned houses for a living.
Fil was middle-class, Dickie Toledo made some money as a surfer.
Toledo father was actually a great surfer, o remember him as one of the most radical of his time. He did great air and was Brazilian national champion a few years if I can remember correctly.
He rips. 3x brazilian champ
Thanks for the clarification! 👍
Granted, but raised in objective geographical privilege.
and the support of an entire surf community who knew her kids her “special”.
objective is subject to outside bias…subjective is the way to go! or is it vice-versa?
Can’t wait for this to happen to pro surfing
Wait until the UAE take over the WSL
When did Brazil become a race?
Brasil passports are considered some of the most valuable on the international black market as anyone of any ethnicity can be a Brazilian – white, black, asian, middle east, etc.
No so with other widely-accepted passports, like Japan – a Japan passport holder would be expected to be ethnic Japanese, a Brasil passport holder can literally be any ethnicity – “Brazilian” is not a race, it’s a nationality.
*HI. (which WE all know is separate from da mainland when it comes to surfing cuz) Shooootz.
That makes a lot more imbroglio’s than is usual by this time of the year.
So many imbroglio’s, soooooo so many.
Let alone all the broiling of ’em…
Watch LA LA Land. The ‘white guy saves jazz’ rhetoric is constant in most aspects of the entertainment industry. Whitey’s want it all. White Boomers got it all. If they can’t have it all, they’ll take up their toys and play elsewhere. Or invent an endevour where only they can afford to play (golf but for the Tiger anomily and triathlon to name a couple)
Deep sea submarining being a better example than golf
Hold on, there are two Pakistanis on that death godforsaken death trap!
How do you define wealthy?
First board was a brand-new custom shape vs. an old brown handed-down beat-up cooler-lid looking thing…
never crossed a wooden plank that I couldn’t ride…
Elo’ll quit when he gets his blue belt in surfing.