Smoking and gun play not included in rankings but would have pushed Florida to 100 of top 100 most dangerous beaches in US. Photo: Spring Breakers.
Smoking and gun play not included in rankings but would have pushed Florida to 100 of top 100 most dangerous beaches in US. Photo: Spring Breakers.

Shock in Sunshine State after Florida accounts for the entire top 25 most dangerous beaches in the USA

Shark attacks, hurricanes, dangerous rip currents oh my!

There are records and then there are RECORDS. Like, Sebastian Steudtner riding the biggest wave in the world is a record. Florida accounting for 100% of the top 25 most dangerous beaches in the United States of American is a RECORD and one that should be properly honored here.

The list was compiled by California criminal defense and personal injury law firm Simmrin Law Group maybe rising some questions of fairness but not rising them enough to dwell upon. According to their “experts,” hurricane strikes, shark attacks and “surf zone fatalities” were taken into consideration.

“While shark attacks often grab headlines, Florida’s beaches rank so high due to the ever-present hurricane risk,” Michael Simmrin, of Simmrin Law, told Fox News. “Hurricanes create dangerous rip currents and storm surge, raising the overall risk for beachgoers. With summer approaching and vacations on the minds of many Americans, this study shows the importance of putting safety first when considering a trip to the beach.”

Thus, without further ado:

1 New Smyrna Beach, Florida – 76.04

2 Panama City Beach, Florida – 67.75

3 Daytona Beach, Florida – 60.01

4 Miami Beach, Florida – 47.78

5 Cocoa Beach, Florida – 46.35

6 Ormond Beach, Florida – 41.57

7 Ponce Inlet, Florida – 41.54

8 Indialantic Beach, Florida – 41.02

9 Melbourne Beach, Florida – 40.92

10 Miramar Beach, Florida – 40.63

Numbers 11 – 25 more of the same.

But do you think Kelly Slater is sad that his Cocoa Beach is so deadly or do you imagine that is part of what gave him the strength to paddle over the ledge at dangerous waves like Head Place? While Brazil’s beaches were not included in this important study, I wonder where Ubatuba ranks?

Hmmmmmm.

In any case, raise a Hunahpu’s Imperial Stout to our Floridian friends.

Huzzah.

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