Olympic surfers tout their “love boat” after athletes arriving to Paris claim beds in village “anti-sex”

Steamy nights ahead.

The 2024 Olympic Games is now, officially, but hours away and, yet, the war between those competing in Paris and those competing 10,000 a miles away in Teahupo’o is already heating up. The early victories went to Paris with one intrepid surf journalist on the ground describing the culinary delights awaiting those bound for the City of Lights. Foie gras, steak frites with pepper sauce, croissants and duck as many ways as can be imagined. One, and only one, dish is served at the End of the Road and it is poisson cru and it is served three meals a day and for snack.

And yet, might our surfers have just one an important battle of their own?

Athletes are just beginning to arrive at Paris’ Olympic Village situated in an outer suburb. Now, I traveled to a nearby outer suburb, Nanterre, for two straight weeks and must admit that the pheromones from the City of Love don’t really waft beyond the arrondissement. And, according to British diver Tom Daley, they may not need too as he described the thin bed as “anti-sex” in a TikTok demonstration.

Irish gymnast Rhys McClenaghan recorded himself flipping etc. on the bed to test the theory and found it just fine, declaring his English counterpart was spreading “fake news” but those two countries’ centuries long “troubles” make any information suspect.

On and on, anyhow, the debate went whilst surfers, halfway across the world, smugly spooned down yet another helping of poisson cru whilst lounging on their “love boat.” As you know, the surfers and Colin Jost will be staying on a reconstituted cargo ship as a “floating hotel.” And as anyone who has ever watched a television series about “life aboard” knows, “a little night music” is the most common tune of all.

The Aranui 5 will surely be a’ rockin’ but which of our surfers will be involved?

Steamy nights ahead.