A love story.
It’s a good thing this didn’t happen in Brazil, if you know what I mean, House Toledo shaken to its very core, but Hurricane Debby washed a reported $1.6 million United States dollars of cocaine on Florida’s shores after passing by the Sunshine State earlier this month. Surfers wiping noses and solving the world’s most intractable problems. The fourth named storm of the season was described as “erratic” by meteorologists and know we know why.
A “good Samaritan” alerted authorities after stumbling cocaine packages weighing about 70 pounds with an estimated street value of more than $1 million.
“We appreciate the help of Good Samaritans in our community who saw something unusual and contacted law enforcement,” Collier County Sheriff Kevin Rambosk declared.
Boaters found a further $625,000 USD of cocaine floating it the crystalline waters. They, too, turned their find over.
“Some smugglers intentionally drop bales of drugs wrapped in plastic or watertight containers into the sea at predetermined locations for later retrieval by other smugglers,” Brian Townsend, a retired supervisory special agent with the Drug Enforcement Administration, told the most trusted name in news. Weird currents from hurricanes can snatch the loot right up and spit it out in lineups.
Heady days.
But have you ever discovered a bale of cocaine, however small, while surfing?
What did you do with it?
Share, please.
While gathering your thoughts, the award-adjacent book Cocaine + Surfing is available once more after it, too, was nearly cancelled. Get while hot.
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Noice!
Sounds cool. They should try squirting some of it into Joe Turpel’s mouth to see if it stops noises too
We had the North Koreans try to offload drugs in the middle of winter in big SW swell. The famous pong su incident. One of the fools drowned trying to get it ashore at night in 8-10 foot surf and herion washed up all down the coast.
Sick, time to surf that wave out at the Farallon Islands.
Kooks. The lot of them. Fools!!
Sell in bulk to escape the Barrio, fix the school roof, feed the hungry, re-pew the church pews, pay for a month’s food for few families, or even do the unthinkable and chop it, rack it, and snort it up off a stripper’s tits, All valid and worthwhile ways to use the and or lose the devils dandruff. Anything and I do mean anything, but giving this to the authorities would have been preferable.
Congrats. these actions equal more zealous and unjustifiably confident police who are so amped up and coke fizz’n that they start nicking people for any old anything and pushing people around high on the power and high on the the powdaah- and it’s all due to fucken cock-foreheads hitting the jackpot and giving it ALL to the least deserving of such a windfall. The filth!!
2024 is a dud of a year.
I discovered the Scripps Research Pier boat shook free from it’s davit one morning, after a night of cocaine and Sublime.
(that count?)
Counts double.
Noses?
Only an idiot wastes good drugs by snorting them.
That to the side, more about your book almost getting canceled, Chas.
Bumhole time!
Xox
Up the bum don’t become a mum
Can still leak out and crawl its way up!
Tokyo drift
No.
IV
That’s heavy.
Xox
https://uploads.disquscdn.c…
Don’t rack it, just stack it eh? Boof’n coke though? not sure how good that would go tbh..
I saw him live in Columbia MO in 1996 (I think).
god forsaken town but for the uni
There was a whole bunch round NSW central coast a few months back. Lots and lots.
Oh the “I’m swimming in cold water” for my mental health ruse is busted wide open.
LOL.
Before my current fixation with immersing my nipples.
Seen a lot of odd shit floating around the Newport river jetties after a good rain. Couches, crusty drawers and the like. Maybe even a Peruvian or two. But never THEE Peruvian. Kinda glad I haven’t.
All over the place among the trust fund clowns living further south on the peninsula though
Newport’s Golden Triangle. You could scrape an 8ball off the floor of Harborside or the Rusty Pelican bathrooms back when Dennis Rodman lived up off 48th street.
When i was a kid i found a small taped up brick washed ashore. It was was slashed open and the stuff was completely soaked. It was yellowish and smelled horribly. Totally off-putting. I’m not an epidemiologist (or an anesthesiologist for that matter) but I think it was heroin.
Did you dry it out and make a younger sibling try it?
Sounds reasonable, especially as i am the younger one.
I was pretty much straight-edge back then. I looked at it, poked around with a broken shell, smelled it and thought ‘fucking junkies, you are a sick bunch’.
Had a few bricks wash up here. Pretty good pile one time- several kilos. Neighbor found a brick and turned it over. More than a few around here made a pile of money finding these several decades back. More sophisticated now – you try and sell it, the cartel will know and you’ll be dead.
Should be enough for one person to last at least three or four decades. Party on!
Good luck doing that drug while simultaneously keeping it secret
Cocaine haikus
are better left
to people who count
Hey man, you count too Non, you count too…
syllables
Paging Eddie. He’ll make haiku sense of this story.