"It was heartbreaking to watch it go by and think that should have been my wave."
An emotional Kelly Slater has formally announced he has surfed his “last-ever heat at Cloudbreak” following his elimination round loss to Brazilian Yago Dora at the Fiji Pro a short time ago.
Speaking to WSL anchor AJ McCord, Kelly Slater, who is fifty-two and the daddy of a newborn and as yet unnamed son with Chinese-American girlfriend Kalani Miller, said:
“I knew there’s two good waves in most sets. Most of the good sets didn’t hit the right spot. And I took a bad wave with priority. So I gave priority over to Yago… And at that point, you know, I probably was out of the heat already. There wasn’t really much else I could have done… It was heartbreaking to watch it go by and think that should have been my wave.
I’m happy for Yago and and just… this was probably the last heat I’ll ever surf out here at Cloudbreak.
Cue choked back tears etc.
Real or prank? Who knows?
The first time Kelly Slater retired was in 1998, the then six-time world champ having just-turned twenty-six. He competed sporadically over the next few years, winning Pipe in 1999 and the Eddie in 2002, before re-joining the tour to take on Andy Irons head-on, hinting at retirement every year thereafter.
Other retirement announcements can be found here, here, here and here.
Likely, we’ll see Kelly Slater at Pipeline and at next year’s Tahiti event, if the tour still exists.
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Kelly Slater is the true definition of the term “Jumping the shark” Go (really) retire and surf with RFKjr & Ivanka Trump
Now he can surf for fun like the rest of us! I retired four years ago and having my best life yet! All the best to Kelly, Kalani and the new baby! Your toughest job yet!
As well as being a shit dad, Kelly always offers overly complex breakdowns of why he didn’t progress & never admits that he got dusted by a younger, hungrier competitor
Kelly you were amazing, but you are irrelevant in the current crop
This one’s real. Time comes for us all, even the GOAT’s.
“Likely, we’ll see Kelly Slater at Pipeline and at next year’s Tahiti event, if the tour still exists.”
If the tour still exists?
Shirley you jest?
Pretty sure Dirk Ziff (thanks to Natasha), has put everyone and everything involved with the Wsl tour on ‘AUTO-PAY’— for at least the next 10 years.
The money just ‘automatically’ comes out of one of Dirk’s (tax-write-off), accounts every month and goes directly into the waiting hands of everyone involved with the Wsl.
With ‘Auto-Pay’ set up, Dirk doesn’t even have to bother thinking about the Wsl and can go with his life and business.
And Natasha’s happy.
Happy wife—happy life.
hypothetically speaking, if this were true, why does he keep hiring non-surfers to run this little tax shelter? Why not just hire someone with some street cred if you don’t care about whether the thing turns a profit? And yet … that NFL guy, Beth, ELO and now Crosby.
Isn’t there some saying about how doing the same thing over and over while expecting a different result is the definition of insanity??
I’m with BeachCrab, ‘if the tour still exists.’
PS
If you have a more plausible explanation why Dirk keeps supporting the WSL, please share it with us.
Inquiring minds would like to know.
Why not just hire someone with some street cred if you don’t care about whether the thing turns a profit?”
Apparently, he does not care, if he keeps hiring a bunch of losers .
And for approximately 10 years now, the checks keep coming like clockwork, keeping the WSL alive.
It was Natasha’s idea to get involved with pro surfing (as she surfs and Dirk does not).
Happy wife—happy life.
You really think a billionaire, after 10 years and counting, is going to lose sleep over what is ‘petty change’ to him?
What did Joe Walsh say?
“I have accountants pay for it all. —Life’s been good to me so far.”
This far down the road, I think Dirk’s over even giving it more than an occasional thought, Let the Missus have her little play thing.
I really think all of the above is the most plausible explanation..
I made more waves today in the tub than Kelly did in his two heats. Gil takes the moral victory.
They moved on from that guy dying in there pretty quickly. Gotta pay the bills I guess. What setting do you like the best?
I thought it was a bit suss when he realised the camera cut to him and Yago talking post heat and he rejected the can of soft drink (red bull?) that he was being handed and complained that he ordered water. Is that a health brag or a dodge of unintentional brand advertising?
Bonsoy coconut water. Mrs Gunderson is a fan. Noticed that push away too. I thought branding
He did that on Purps-pose
like a junkie friend relapsing over and over. You want to help but knowing they’ll just do it again. Pathetic
perfect analogy
I would have been shocked if he had won his heat. It’s no shock that he lost. He has not looked like winning a heat in years.
He still smokes people in big fucken barrels to be fair but often gets kicked out in shit waves before the “good” day of anywhere on tour with good waves
The fear in his eyes realizing he now has to return home and help raise his child. Unless WSL let’s him stay and work the booth….
Unless the Wsl ‘lets’ him??
Slater’s got Dirk Ziff and the Wsl in his back pocket.
I think Slater’s the one calling the shots…..
I’ll be baaaaccckkk !
https://uploads.disquscdn.c…
can I get an autographed version??
Needs more muffin top.
he just can NOT live without attention can he?
His best woulda been going out after winning the Pipeline Pro 4 years ago rivaling greatest exits and then into the Outerknown. But no…
Love the subtle troll by not calling it pipe masters 😀
He wanted olympic gold. That’s what kept him going.
his pool will succeed where he fell short.
Ill be the 1st cunt to say I jealously dont care. Selly Klater flying there uses more C02 in one flight then all of the carbon offsets his brand Underknown could pay for.
Hes a millionaire & we had to deal with his bragging about creampieng his gf who could be his daughter and letting the world know it.
The guys is insufferable with his rubbing it in.
So Im sitting here somewhere between jealous and contrite for realizing it all.
https://media0.giphy.com/me…
Still don’t understand how you retire from something after being cut/sacked
read here-
Against Griffin Colapinto in the Round of 32, Kelly Slater never found any rhythm, ending the heat with two measly 3 point rides to get cut from the CT. After being chaired up the stairs for the last time as a full time competitor, Slater reflected on his emotions in a raw interview with Stace Galbraith.
i think by now he has more retirements than world titles.
The GOAT of retiring
He’s like that guy from falling down. Got sacked but kept on going to work. Then loses the plot and goes on an unintentional rampage.
Always liked that movie and loved the Romancing Stone seen where Micheal Douglas slides down mud cliff to land chin deep into that wet bush.. That was some exciting stuff for a 14 year old dreaming about adventure.
You can’t fire me, I quit!
Poor old Ke11y
He was always gonna go out on a flat note at whatever venue.
But now it’s fingers crossed he doesn’t take this comment (that we know he’s definitely reading) literally, and torture us all by putting his old band back together.
That truly was a mighty shit band…
The Surfers?
NO
Amazing is the fact that there was nobody around Kelly when this was happening that spoke up and said: “lol, nah buddy, get the fuck away from that microphone and get ahold of yourself mate. You can thank me later for not allowing you to make a cunt of yourself.”
Everyone just tongues his bunghole to the point he thinks he’s a musician lol
While everyone else is over on the live comment thread…..let us note the word “probably”. And now back to the comment thread
Here here here here and here Iol Derek
I don’t often do subtlety, but it’s a powerful tool!
I still can’t believe you still haven’t put on that video of Owen O’Dawg Wrights tiny wiener freezing off.
what happened to his weiner?
It froze off!
Xox