"She put her taut physique and long slender legs on display as she masterfully conquered the waves at the scenic hotspot."
You would not believe the amount of “surfing celebrity” content I am served daily. Pages upon pages of Ivanka Trump, Lady Gaga, Ashley Green and a host of British and Australian WAGs of whom I’ve never heard. And while most could maybe ignore this onslaught, it is my job to click.
And click I do, bracing for the inevitable image/video of aforementioned celebrity or WAG wake surfing, FlowRiding, being pushed into a Kelly Slater Surf Ranch by the one-and-only Raimana van Bastolaer, arms akimbo, smiles wide.
Decidedly not surfing, or at least the sort you and I are interested upon.
You can imagine my utter shock this morning, then, when I was fed the headline “Michael Clarke’s ex Jade Yarbrough strips down to a brown bikini and flaunts her flawless figure while showcasing her surfing skills” screaming from Daily Mail UK. I had absolutely zero idea who Michael Clarke or Jade Yarbrough were, though the source being Daily Mail UK assumed it was either footballer and WAG or reality television stars.
Boy, was I wrong-ish.
Michael Clarke happens to be a retired Australian cricket legend. Jade Yarbrough an Australian designer.
I winced as I clicked, ready to get smacked by wake surfing.
You can certainly understand my shock, then, when I witnessed Yarbrough sliding as naturally as any surfer I’ve ever seen down a right-running gem.
“Michael Clarke’s ex-girlfriend Jade Yarbrough has left fans in awe after showcasing her incredible bikini body and impressive surfing skills in a fun video posted to Instagram,” the Daily Mail piece began, continuing, “The clip captured the interior designer, 32, rocking her best angles in a racy two-piece bikini while riding the waves at a beach in Queensland. She put her taut physique and long slender legs on display as she masterfully conquered the waves at the scenic hotspot.”
Masterfully conquered is right. Yarborough looks like a goofy-footed Andy Irons. Like a silky smooth Rob Machado and I am stunned that Michael Clarke let this talent go.
For shame.
Dimity Stoyle, it must be noted, agrees with me, commenting “ripping” on the fun video.
Dimity Stoyle right more than she’s wrong.
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Dream hook up for Jamie O. Hopefully paddling off on their soft tops together towards the horizon.
KARLOS YA CUNT!
From the looks of her skin, I think this is the first time she ever ventured outdoors…..
Can you imagine a hot, young model wanting to get with an older, rich athlete/celebrity? Yuck.
All of that money would turn me off, when there are so many sexy people on the dole (lots of free time) on the beach.
Speaking of sexy people on the dole, when will we see Meghan Markle surfing?
Michael Clarke was the captain of the Australian cricket team. He married this bird back in the day. Paparazzi loved it… https://uploads.disquscdn.c…
Didn’t even recognise her from that photo. Only discovered her, on the other side of the world, when she ended her slumming phase and locked down ol’ Sam.
Fuck she had bad taste in men.
She was the face of an Australian tourism campaign. Famously asking “where the bloody hell are you?”
I’ve since heard ….and YouTubed the ad.
Nevertheless, she’s one of those women that got hotter as she aged. She was fairly young when she became a sensation in Aus. By the time I found out who she was , over 10 years later, she was much hotter.
And she looks a little bit retarded which sets me Off !
Mate! Lol.
Who dat
YouTube “Lara Bingle Where the Hell are ya” to see where she got her start.
….and then Google her.
That I’m gonna do, Sir! Only for research purpose, of course. I’m a man of culture. Cheers mate!
Backdoor shootout on. Not sure I’m gonna watch.
And miss Mormons lecture you on Hawaiian history?
Every year have to learn the Hawaiian name for a rainbow.
Internet winner for the day*
As a recovering ex-Mormon turned militant atheist, I approve this message!
Speaking of Backdoor:
https://youtu.be/E9n3v4Wr-JI?si=ljN5MvvryVun10yU
Fark, I tried to read that but my mind kept dishing out the sound of a Charlie Brown teacher while I was trying to read.
actually just skipped and came straight to the comments
Rob Machado…much like Mason Ho does an incredible job of playing the biggest stoner on Earth while never ever cameo–ing their participation or love for Cannabis.
I see her surf stance is goofy but the BG commentariat would like to know her stance on Isreal/Palestine
If you want to get a hostage to talk just put em in a room with Dimity DJing and lock the door.
She meant “ripping” as in I just found your purse and credit cards.
Dimity Stoylen belongings
Come on DR do a story on Dimitys light fingers and her purchases online in Hawaii.
What exactly did she buy