Blood Feud: Hardcore New Zealand bodyboarder versus angry local on jetski!

"This fella would literally run you over with the ski..."

Most surfers of a certain age were raised on diet of surf mags that celebrated going hard, rooting “chicks,” rude surf wear that was 85.8% covered in logos from 4 different companies and of course, hating bodyboarders.

Now I personally never really thought about why I hated Boogers. It just was so sub-consciously ingrained. It certainly didn’t help the cause that the only one I ever knew growing up was a weird dork. Sure there was certain mostly true stereotypes of pre-pubescent skinny 12 year olds doing 5x lame 360’s on soft shoulders, but there just weren’t many in my world.

As a weak minded feeble teenager surfer not looking to stand out from the crowd due to the fear of some naked hazing ritual in the carpark, it was just easier to roll with the pack. Hating Boogers, pretending to like ciggies and laughing at the older local heroes lame jokes was the safest way to navigate those testosterone fueled years of the early 90’s

My first real exposure to our flippered friends was seeing one free falling 15 meters inside the pack wave after wave into some throaty death barrels on an Indonesian reef break. Instant respect in my mind as the rest of us quivered on the shoulder on our 7 foot plus guns.

But you know who didn’t roll with the pack? Boogers. Way too busy quietly pioneering death barrels over nutty rock ledges while we chased long point breaks.

Boring perfection they just had zero interest in.

Just like surfers being late to the party at said slabs, we’re late to finding this absolutely hilarious yarn from New Zealand bodyboarder Sam Wells about a run in with a local stand up enforcer on a jet ski.

It’s from the equally hilarious Podcast from a couple of my southern brothers The Fumanswoo Podcast. Well worth a listen and maybe even a like and subscribe if you want to hear more about bodyboarders dissing Nate Florence for being a sissy boy scared of dirty water, mid-lenghth surfboard advice, circle jerks, more WSL moaning than here, group didgeridoo sexual intercourse sessions and general peeping-tom behaviour from our lay down friends.

Oh and dirty Wendy chit chat.

Good old Wendy.