"Is Chris Binns locked in a mega-prison?"

A whereabout investigation is currently underway for the Australian surf journalist Chris Binns after he published a disturbing story claiming the Surf City El Salvador Pro to be “must-watch” and the World Surf League Championship Tour’s “hottest new surf stop.”

Surf fans tuned in, today, to the Surf City El Salvador Pro and were left with haunting depression as the “world’s best surfers” were forced to struggle in brown wind-blown slop over greasy rocks.

And yet, Binns had just boldly claimed:

El Salvador is a Central American country that’s been changed by the sport of surfing, with tourists from around the world flocking to experience its waves. While La Libertad is one of many global locales that argue over the ‘Surf City’ moniker, the fact the WSL Championship Tour heads there every year is a strong endorsement of its claim.

He went on to write:

Did you know that El Salvador is the only Central American country without a Caribbean coastline? You do now! The Salvadorans have never let that fact bother them in the least and why would they, their 300km Pacific coast is teeming with world class waves. Nayib Bukele, El Salvador’s president, is a big believer in using tourism to turn around the fortunes of his once-troubled nation and that means he’ll do whatever it takes to attract surfers, who he sees as a crucial component of the country’s tourism makeup.

Nayib Bukele, El Salvador’s president, is also a big believer in jail. What proceeded, from Binns, was a Stockholm Syndrome bit of nonsense including:

El Salvador has long been on the adventurous surfer’s bucket list and while the challenges to overcome were many, the Salvadoran Holy Grail lay in the mythical, rifling tubes of Punta Roca.

And…

The Surf City El Salvador Pro has only run three times, yet in that short time its easy to see what a bellwether event it has been for the world title showdown.

Also…

El Salvador also demands that surfers allow themselves to relax a little, to conserve their energy in the brutal sun and hot water. The ice baths in the Red Bull Athlete Zone cool the body, but also allow the mind to calm, while chaos runs free in the backstreets of town.

Surf fans who accidentally tuned in to the worst day of professional surfing history since the Abu Dhabi Pro left scratching heads and wondering if Binns had been incarcerated in one of the nation’s famous mega-prisons and forced to write his way out.

Busily calling embassies etc.

Your feelings?

More as the story develops.

La Libertad!

"For the inmates, chiefly the ones there accidentally, the bush will represent life's simple joys..."

Exciting times in professional surfing, what with Kelly Slater being gifted one last shot at a 12th title and the World Surf League Championship Tour rolling into so-hot-right-now El Salvador. The Surf City Pro opens its waiting period, tomorrow, in La Libertad and our heroes and heroines are already there, practicing their trade on the Little Thumb’s user-friendly waves.

Less than one hour away, by car, is the now-famous Terrorism Confinement Center at the pointy end of the Trump administration’s mass deportation program. Immigrants, labeled as Venezuelan gang members, were absconded by plane in the dead of night and dumped in the sprawling complex over a judge’s express order to chill opening the door for a potential constitutional crisis.

Built in in 2022, the largest prison in Latin America has the capacity for 40,000 people. According to Foreign Policy, “El Salvador now has the highest incarceration rate in the world, with 2 percent of the population in prison. The country’s prison population has exploded from an already overcrowded 38,000 people at the beginning of (President) Bukele’s administration in 2019 to an estimated 120,000 people today. Most prisoners have not yet been convicted of any crime.”

Sin Libertad.

Conditions inside are described as extremely bleak with lack of bunks, wanton violence and bad vibes. Life not fun, at all, for those trapped behind bars and especially those trapped behind bars due administrative mistakes.

Well, the World Surf League to the rescue.

Known for being one of the most socially progressive of all sports’ leagues, the “global home of surfing” is reportedly planning on sending two or three of its stars to plant a bush outside the mega-complex, during one of the lay days, in order to brighten the overall mood.

“For the inmates, chiefly the ones there accidentally, the bush will represent life’s simple joys,” the director of the non-profit WSL PURE declared, continuing, “A small reminder that happiness comes from within.”

That last bit was seen as a subtle jab at Secretary of Homeland Security Kristi Noem, who toured the facility recently and reminded the inmates that happiness can also come from a $50,000 Rolex Cosmograph Daytona.

American dreams.