"Honestly, some of the biggest kooks I've ever seen happened to be surfing today."
It’s been a terrible two days for the learner surfer, a long protected species, ocean is there to be shared etc, who has suddenly been thrust under the klieg lights and told to beat it.
Yesterday, learner surfers were officially banned from surfing at Cloud 9, a popular reef break on the Philippine island of Siargao and made popular by prolific BeachGrit commenter Johnny Callahan and his toy boys Evan Slater and Taylor Knox.
You’ll recall local photographer Bryan Waverider, again, not real sure he was born thus, writing:
NEW SURFING RULES IN SIARGAO
1. Beginners Surf Lessons are NOT ALLOWED at Cloud 9 Surf Spot.
2. Surf shops are NOT ALLOWED to rent out surfboards to beginner surfers without instructor.
The new rules were universally hailed by longtime surfers as overdue and necessary, many pointing out the dysfunction of that most mythical of tropical surf spots, Uluwatu.
Uluwatu in Bali is horrendous for this. Instructors taking over the line up, pushing low level surfers that are struggling to paddle let alone catch a wave. This scenario takes away everything that makes these locations so special when you finally do become good enough to surf them.
Today it is Nathan Florence, a surfer of the year and brother of John John Florence, and Koa Rothman, scion of North Shore philanthropist Fast Eddie Rothman, lamenting the explosive growth of kooks in the lineup.
The clip is below with both men describing various learner horrors.
As much as I enjoy the brotherhood of surfing, and I definitely believe the more the merrier, I have qualms regarding certain behaviours.
- Calling a better surfer off a wave. There is no greater lesson than being given a chance to examine, closely, the lines of a good or great surfer.
- Wearing surf hats unless pale-skinned and, or, bald.
- Leashless longboards in a pack.
- A lower intermediate surfer on a seventy-litre board snatching every chip shot on the tip of the bank and veering both ways thereby clearing the left and the right.
- Not splitting peaks.
- Getting heated up over a drop-in unless wave, barrel, of a lifetime or deliberately provocative.
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Nate, judgments you make of others are often reflections of yourself.
I am literally the kook of all kooks out there. I am an overweight 48 year old on a 100 liter surf school special foamy, sitting exactly 20 feet out further than the entire line up. I go for the waves I want and miss about half of them. My pop up is three step process where I burpee jump, land on two feet facing forward and then hop in to a goofy footed stance..
The thing is that I just dont care… I learned 3 years ago and I love it too much to let any dirty looks or confrontations stop me from having my fun.. just like all the rest of you guys.
The surf hat can be a necessity for those with fairer skin and surfers who would to avoid Pterygium surgery .
Good Allah the surf hat comment is fucking lame..
All the online whinging will never replace our duty to educate others in the lineup. It starts with you, your kids and your kids’ friends
as per usual, the standard of good surfing is defined by no other than myself…
“Calling a better surfer off a wave ”
Yeah everyone should just watch you Nate especially while you are visiting and filming their spots and even when you drop in on them by the sounds of it ….
Sheesh , ego getting out of control or what?
Wanker
Yeah what a cunt!
“OMG it’s so crowded and no one knows what they’re doing. What the fuck happened to surfing?”
*creates surf vlog
https://uploads.disquscdn.c… Doing my part
Rip curl the yeti search,how many dam Val’s and “bucket list” best life van living kooks do we see trying to hand jive cross step ( singular) no leash hat wearing long board riding Chick’s n dudes do we have to have thrust down our lifestyles throat , you want to stop it , then use the power of cash. Stop buying their products and they will gone within 2 years .stop buy Florence and they will be outa there in 12 months and sold to kmart.
Stop whining do something about it.
and I was just going to but one of those ridiculous white hooded florence rashies for 200 bucks
https://uploads.disquscdn.c…
Maureen X Rated
Get an oneill one. They were around before Florence’s were a thought in their mums testosterone filled fallopian tubes.
You can rock one as longvas you only surf with Gary Bennet and Co
Yewwww .
“Wearing surf hats…”
hey hey hey, pump your brakes.
allow me my kooky accessories.
A fellow brother in baldness
luckily still packing a solid but greying mane, but the summer sun here is fucking mental. the hat mullet and brim are a great second line of defence.
Don’t forget Nate is also “son in law of Kaiborg Garcia”.
We’re going to see more and more surf spots that have expensive resorts with difficult or private access to the waves. Nihiwatu will be their ideal where you have to pay over 1k a night to surf. I don’t know many details about the Pavones deal, but don’t be surprised if they try to restrict land access to the spot. It’s the same deal with tourists paying locals to push them into waves.
The people who complained about the best surfers getting the best waves did not realize that they’d be worse off without it.
well, nathan shouldn’t be surprised considering he’s the one selling a 6’2 40-Liter foam board described as the “perfect board for your first transition to a performance shape from a longboard“
…probably the perfect board for his average viewer… and he doesn’t realize that same viewer is both the reason he can make a living off YouTube, and the reason the lineups are so crowded.
https://uploads.disquscdn.c…
It’s starting to seem like John Semen Cuntyhan is giving Dez blowie’s on the side with all mentioning of him in the sharticles.
Beginner surfers should all be sent to Yemen for 3 months to learn to surf. Then have to surf a yellow-sprayed surfboard for a year.
They should also be verbally abused while in Yemen.
Bitch slapped by someone wearing a yellow beanie indoors at industry event – the ultimate rite of passage
Isn’t Doheny in Yemen?
“Wearing Surf Hats”
Gotta love these guys talking about etiquette when they blow up every single spot they surf. Film and post their whole lives and the whole purpose of what they do is to get more people in the water to sell product to.
This whole vlog thing is fucked, especially for a sport like surfing. All it does is make a few people money and fucks it for everyone else. At least back in the day surf movies and mags would generally try to keep locations secret. Now they make 20 minute edits of themselves talking while they drive into a spot. Hypocrites.
Wat goes around comes around fella’s, next time put a sock in it when u find some new spot to exploit…
“DoN’t ForGeT tO SmAsH thAt LiKe ButTon”
Ugggghhhhh…
In our days, to surf, you first had to learn how to be a Surfer.
On your own.
Nowadays, everyone can hire a Surfer, so they can surf…
From the Tahiti Teahuppo Guru at the Ranch, to Jetski rides in Nazareth it’s all a question of money now. At every beach in Brazil now, everyone can hire an ex Pro who became a PersonalSurfer available to hire, so you can have a session with someone clearing the path to you.
Maldives? Chile? Sure, but let’s take our Personal Surfer, so he can analise in video our turns. Push us into waves. And don’t forget the photographers. Every beach here now has at least 5 cameras registering your awesome surfing.
They had jetskis in Nazareth? That’s some advanced shit for the Byzantine era.
Thats nice to know, woudnt like to say it out loud in an angry lineup tho
sorry bout that Einstein…
by the way. How many languages you speak?
At my last test I was fluent in 17, with understanding of 26 more. None of those are Portuguese though, that language sucks balls.
you barely speak English, spicolli.
At least I understand when to capitalize letters and how to spell Spicoli.
Yeah justinian the 1st also had a concave 6.8 for when the swell picked up around constantinople
upvote for analise – that’s exactly what it’s become nowadays – anal!
I disagree. There is not any amount of money in the world that can replace time. You have to put in the a shit ton of time to even get to the point where you can regularly ride down the face of a wave. And if you are learning as an adult it is even harder. I fell on sand for 2 years straight surfing almost every day before I could even get to a point where I was no longer in the beginner stage. I remember there was a time when if I got to my feet during a session, it was a big deal for me.
I can only speak for my neck of the woods in the U.S. (New Jersey) when I say this… but part of the problem here is if any VAL, trust fund brat, tourist, newcomer, etc. were to read any of this, the first thing they’d say is, “who is Nathan Florence?” Same for any of “pro surfer” outside of the GOAT
We are so so off the rails over here in the arm pit of the East Coast, be it summer or winter, that I’m not sure normalcy can be restored.
I’m way south of you. Much worse waves. Surf camps everywhere. We need some sharks and waves of consequence to drown some people. Only way it cleans up. Or more wave pools.
Arm pit! Way South! More like the “balls and the dirty south” respectively. Only reason I say this because it sure feels like I live in the “taint of the east..” being beaten flat by the balls and slightly humid enough to realize pretty damn close to the dirty south.
I struggled to put shoes on today for a meeting after a VAL on a softboard took me out and cut the top of my foot as I paddled out Sunday morning. The prick could have peeled off the back of the wave but with no skill paired with no ability to turn his board he went straight into me