Someone pictured making money teaching someone else to "surf."
Someone pictured making money teaching someone else to "surf."

Disgraced real-estate developer turns to surf instruction after falling $71 million in debt

How many lessons will it take to get even?

If your life suddenly veered off track and ended up in a ditch, where would you turn? I’ve had a plan for some time, now. In the event that everything gets wrecked, work destroyed, house taken by bank, hovering lawsuits, I would go to Las Vegas and deal blackjack. Now, I have no card shuffling skills, nor do I particularly enjoy being in a casino, but I feel Vegas would amuse enough and that I’d be an amiable enough croupier, telling stories of my past life as a winsome surf journalist to the oohs and aahs of degenerates.

What I would not do is pivot to surf instruction but to each his own, I suppose, and let us shift our attention to Baltimore and the one-time flashy real-estate developer Brandon Chasen. Not very long ago, Charm City was in the palm of his hand with exciting projects in the works and panache in spades.

Well, the wheels all fell off, life went into ditch and Chasen finds himself in both personal and professional bankruptcy, reportedly over $71 million in debt.

Instead of Vegas and Lady Luck, the powerfully built man moved to Costa Rica where, according to The Banner, he is “doing a bit of consulting and teaching surf lessons.”

A few questions, I guess.

1) What sort of surf instructing skill does a formerly rich Baltimorean have? Do you think, like some other rich men, that he spent those salad years on yachts with Kelly Slater, sucking up tips and pointers like a sponge? Or do you think he realized that surf instruction is all fake anyhow so who cares?

2) How many surf lessons would have to be taught in order to dig out from $71 million down?

That’s all.

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Nastrabrahmus
Nastrabrahmus
11 months ago

Lived in DC for a year in high school and went to school with this guy. Less than 75 kids in our class so I knew him well. Dumb as rocks (he got into the school for athletics) and as asshole as a nice compliment to his intelligence. Had no idea any of this shit transpired but gave me a good laugh

Com Turren
Com Turren
11 months ago

oh, I am well aware that most people do not think that lawyers are useful until they actually need one.

Truth
Truth
11 months ago

You blokes know & follow each other & shit..
fuck, for a second I had to make sure I was in the right place

Happy Camper
Happy Camper
11 months ago

absolutely agree with you.
did some framing & concrete work BITD on a construction crew.
easy life, staying fit, no stress, a nice tan and good money.
more and more I feel super stupid for becoming an entrepreneur living a life of stress.

point I was making is Com was trying to call you dumb but couldn’t even get the metaphor correct.

Barrelled
Barrelled
11 months ago
Reply to  Happy Camper

But you’re agreeing with a ghost.

Happy Camper
Happy Camper
11 months ago

when the wheels come off the camper van, I’ll reach out to Rocks and see if he’ll hire me.
seems a good bloke living a fine life……and we both have really hot wifes.

PacificNorthPest
PacificNorthPest
11 months ago

Saw elsewhere that someone invented a paddling workout machine where one lays down on a bench and flails at weighted cables.

Ran here to observe the torrential downpour of zingers.

But nothing.

WTF Beach Grit? What the hell am I paying you for?

@TheRealJackMeoff
@TheRealJackMeoff
11 months ago

As much as a target as it sounds, it would actually be a great addition to hotel gyms across the country.
You can work out all you want when you are landlocked for periods of time but that it the one thing you never can maintain, leading to pain and humiliation every time you finally get back into something real.

Abscessed Llama
Abscessed Llama
11 months ago

Sam George hustling paddling machines like Chuck Norris..

Com Turren
Com Turren
11 months ago

A dumb as a brick bricklayer. This is all making so much sense now!

Happy Camper
Happy Camper
11 months ago
Reply to  Com Turren

do you mean to say : “As dumb as a bricklayer”?
This is all making so much sense now!

Barrelled
Barrelled
11 months ago

Facts are facts Cracker. I just can’t figure out if you are actually B__ M_____ posing as an Aussie.

Barrelled
Barrelled
11 months ago
Reply to  Barrelled

Fucking Benny can’t even stand behind his own comments.

deeks
deeks
11 months ago
Reply to  Barrelled

Brian Moccasin (tour promoter)

Com Turren
Com Turren
11 months ago
Reply to  Barrelled

He who shall not be named could be anyone. He could be anywhere.

Barrelled
Barrelled
11 months ago
Reply to  Com Turren

Meh, Negs has a way of sniffing them out.

PacificNorthPest
PacificNorthPest
11 months ago
Reply to  Barrelled

Benito Mussolini?

Chief Hot stuff
Chief Hot stuff
11 months ago

Ben Meova

PacificNorthPest
PacificNorthPest
11 months ago

Bruno Mars? He seemed like such a nice kid …

Barrelled
Barrelled
11 months ago

Bencong

Barrelled
Barrelled
11 months ago

You forgot the part where you became a dunny rat that cracks a fatty every time you back your clacker up to a koala for a naughty.
I know Negs has a thing for you but you pretty much qualify as a complete POS in my world. Fucking narcissistic, selfie posting, racist, false flag bogan. Fuck off back to Swellnet if you aren’t still banned.

@TheRealJackMeoff
@TheRealJackMeoff
11 months ago
Reply to  Barrelled

Don’t hold back bro, tell us how you really feel…

Barrelled
Barrelled
11 months ago

I have exactly zero tolerance for racist assholes who hide behind some bullshit veil of being a country bumpkin that doesn’t know better all while using the vocabulary of Ivy league grads. No fucking character whatsoever. I’d way rather hear the opinions and input of someone like Otto who has the ability to stand behind his comments instead of hiding and deleting. This guy is just fucked and thinks everyone has some vested interest in seeing photos of him. No surprise at all that Swellnet blew Blowin out of their comments sections.

Happy Camper
Happy Camper
11 months ago
Reply to  Barrelled

HAHAHA.
that first sentence is pure brilliance..

Rocks local
Rocks local
11 months ago

the really interesting part of this story is actually the choice of J IVs in a courtroom. Normally the J 3s with their more prominent use of the classic elephant print, or the J 11s and their patent leather sheen, are the sneaker of choice for more formal occasions.

The IVs, on the other hand, are more utilitarian, kind of like an all purpose hiking boot you can also dunk in. Query whether the federal judge was dismayed by the choice or a closet fan of tinker Hatfield’s sophomore effort.


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