Rumor: Gabi daddy banned from WSL!

For allegedly making threats to judges! Death threats!

Gabriel Medina and his step-father Charlie’s relationship is as storied as any modern romance. Where would the younger Brazilian be without a steadying hand? Where would the older Brazilian be without access to riches and fame? Oh how the love between them is so thick you couldn’t cut it with even a brand new Gillette! So strong that you couldn’t explode it with a Samsung Galaxy 7!

But our world is dark and evil forces, tougher than Gillette stronger than Samsung may be conspiring to keep the two apart.

I was informed today that Charlie has allegedly been BANISHED from the shoreline during World Surf League events for one calendar year. Purportedly EXPELLED into outer darkness. And have you seen him on the beach thus far? The camera always pans to him but no. You haven’t. And why?

For supposedly maybe possibly threatening to OFF a surf judge whilst in Portugal. Perhaps murderous threats. Feasibly death threats.

Aye but love. True love.

And do recall when Gabi daddy, after stepson was defeated in the Hurley Pro, turned to the cameras and said:

I feel sad because they are clearly locking Gabriel. Just imagine if athletics would lock Usain Bolt. Or if swimming would lock Michael Phelps. It’s not cool. The kid born for the sport. He goes there and win, but sadly, five people here define what is good and what is bad. Its like a dictatorship.

A dictatorship!

So really, let’s be sincere here and study the facts. If Charlie did indeed make threats to surf judges whilst in Portugal and if surf judging is indeed a dictatorship then isn’t Gabi daddy a freedom fighter? Part of La Résistance?

Also, if he is doing it for love also doesn’t this quite basically make him Romeo to Gabi’s sweet Juliet?

Yes?

Is Gabi daddy a mix of Che Guevara and Lothario?

Such poetry!

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DavidC
DavidC
9 years ago

Man I’m gonna miss this guy, he brings such colour and vibrancy to the tour!

Trogan Fan
Trogan Fan
9 years ago

curious how you can ban someone from being beach-front at any comp? I get not letting them in the tent.

Tio Sam
Tio Sam
9 years ago

What a bunch of ludicrous crap. This shithole of a site is going from bad to worse. LOL.

Dogsnuts
Dogsnuts
9 years ago
Reply to  Tio Sam

Haha. Totally true article months before the others…

Tostiloco
Tostiloco
9 years ago

Charlie expelled into the outer darkness? So you’re saying he is the tinker who has sold his foundling to whatever evil the world might present “….a world devoid of God, purpose, causality; a world where mankind appears only semi-literate and half-animal.”

dickie toledo
dickie toledo
9 years ago

he’s Kreepy, very very Kreepy

Limbless Jack
Limbless Jack
9 years ago

I would love it if they had like a sideline ref who could red card people off the beach.

Pam's life buoy
Pam's life buoy
9 years ago

“Oh how the love between them is so thick you couldn’t cut it with even a brand new Gillette!” Hahaha Classic Chas

Professor Ski Lodge
Professor Ski Lodge
9 years ago

Fuck’s sake this bloke is uncoachable!

Wardo's PO
Wardo's PO
9 years ago

So, Jordy wins Sunset, DAPL is stopped (for the time being), Austria rejected a far-right candidate, and Gabby’s overbearing stepfather is now banned from WSL events. All in all, not a terrible day.

Jon Pyzel
Jon Pyzel
9 years ago
Reply to  Wardo's PO

If you don’t think about Trump becoming The next American President.

Tom
Tom
9 years ago

Its all Marketing for more WSL site hits – next they will be telling us they are definitely biggest sport in the world as there is 250 Million Brazzos all blowing up on the injustices of King Gabby!!! They are that fucking transparent the WSL !!

Beatrice C. Bogg
Beatrice C. Bogg
9 years ago

would be the best thing ever for gabriel not to have that control freak up his ass every second

J H
J H
9 years ago

He was at Sunset today. Does that “ban” only apply to WSL events?

Tom
Tom
9 years ago
Reply to  J H

Maybe only CT events??

Brutus
Brutus
9 years ago

FFS , this is month old news , yeah he had a crack at the judges at breakfast , and O don’t think its a rumor!

Chas Smith
Chas Smith
9 years ago
Reply to  Brutus

Wait… tell us what you know brut!

Nick Dee
Nick Dee
9 years ago
Reply to  Chas Smith

Charlie is one of the stars in the current Pipe Masters promo. Jesus said to his disciples: “Love one another as I have loved you”. This is how to identify a Crypto-Jew or Fake Xtian, who hate real Christians & generate Satanic divisiveness rather than Christian Brotherhood. Like Jews, they murder Christ. The New Testament warns about the Man of Lawlessness.


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