He needs our help.
Professional surfers… they’re just like us. Tan, fit, model gorgeous with homes in Australia and Kauai, extremely silky barrel skills, above average air games, tan, fit, model gorgeous spouses and children who will someday make them even richer.
But, underneath the perfect facade and also just like us, trouble often lurks.
Drinking problems, uncontrolled gambling, watching modern reality television like Keeping up with the Kardashians or Vanderpump Rules but denying it.
Alas, the heartbreaking troubles of Jack Freestone, coupled with Alana Blanchard, are worrisome but let us hasten to the pages of E! Entertainment for more, so we can help Jack confront his demons.
What’s also special is Alana and Jack’s bond in and out of the water. While many days are spent catching waves, the pair also enjoys daytime dates and picnics outside.
And yes, Jack is guilty of tuning into his leading lady’s favorite reality TV shows.
“I’ll be watching either Vanderpump Rules or Keeping Up With the Kardashians and he’ll pretend to not want to watch it but then he’s fully tuning in,” she joked to us. I keep up with Kim Kardashian and Kanye West. He always gives me so much s–t about my reality TV but I just love them and every time I watch, he’s glued.”
Classic addiction behavior what with the “giving s–t” but secretly indulging.
Jack? If you are reading, the second step to recovery is admitting you have a problem. The first is public ridicule (see above).
Also, when I first skimmed the E! story I confused Vanderpump Rules with the film Van Wilder and thought, “What’s wrong with watching Van Wilder?”
A fine work that doesn’t get nearly enough attention.
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Thats all right. We do what we have to do to get laid as well. Supersedes political identity.
Jack’s eyes are faaaaaaar too close together to be considered gorgeous.
Holoprosencephaly is real.
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Exactly! Frightening shit!
Disingenuous with a motive.
Well, you are that guy.
Jack gave an interview for Stab’s shortlived “The New Normal” series where he talked about fleeing Australia to go to Kauai as the lockdown was beginning. I’m not sure which is less surprising, that he got shit for needlessly endangering the good people of Hawaii in the comment section, or that Stab pulled the interview two days later!
rumor is…shhhhhh… K isle has had a vintage spring. off the hook.
Hawaii went from bombing, second reef Pipe in April to bombing Ala Moana Bowls in June.
Something tells me the Hawaiian Gods are rewarding the Aina and punishing the Haoles.
Like a skilled farmer
Chas has turned cow shit into
Meat and Potatoes
Now haiku is back
May you never leave this place
Your value is great
You’ve been greatly missed here.
Why does anyone outside of surfing even care about them? Most of us in surfing don’t care about them.
Society sees them as good looking. If she was fat nobody would give a shit.
Kim’s pretty fat?
In fact they all are.
No, no – BR n Dick are talking about Jack n Alana.
But yea, the Ks all got booty.
Oh right.
Theyre all single mom’s too, except Kim, but I think her hubbies a bit light in the loafers
I love that saying.
What was the Robin Williams line in “Good Morning Vietnam” about “women in comfortable shoes?”
I guess not fat enough.
I’d give him shit but at his age I was squatting in a council estate watching Neighbours twice a day as dealing petty drugs didn’t quite fill my day.
What’s a council estate?
Like a Chicken cage for the lower classes in the UK.
We call those The Projects.
Same here, but I was more into Home and Away as well as Eastenders with a bit of Emmerdale Farm for good measure when not sitting in the pub haha
Yes! it was Home and Away actually not Neigbours!!
I haven’t been cunting drinkstable
I’m addicted to the anonymous ridicule heaped out here. What’s that signify?
That you’re missing something in your life?
In honesty i wonder if the core 20 to 30 of us hung at chas’s for 6 hours if we’d all end up hating each other by the end of it. Or if we’d pull it off and have fun.
I think we’d pull it off and have fun. Well, as long as we didn’t run out of alcohol and drugs.
I think it’d start off slowly and polite(ish) in initial greetings but would soon warm up.
If it went on for a week or so there could then be a few ruptures and/or teaming up depending on consumption etc.
Kind of like Survivor but with ‘additives’…
Don’t invite DR
He’d definitely want to pull it off
Would love to meet him in person. Smart. Funny. Cosmopolitan. Deep down a bleeding heart. Shiny teeth. Self deprecating when needed.
If the hatred begins to boil to the surface, we need a contingency plan. I say we have Ben Marcus locked in the garage. Party goers can routinely go into the garage to purge hateful feelings on Ben Marcus. Return to the party realizing the collective hate we have for Ben is far more productive than any frustration we may have with one another.
Literally laughing out loud and my wife trying to figure out why. Negs this needs to be a featured comment.
D-Rock does seem like an entertaining guy with a good heart. And like me, a perverted soul.
Need more people on the planet and in the lineup who fit this bill.
I saw their WSL lawn patrol on them and was surprised at how little stuff they had, yet it was still somehow a complete mess.
Jack also listens to and enjoys Bubba Sparxxx.
It’s getting ugly in here.