"Deadly in the Water."
Australia’s Olympic surf team electrified the world, weeks ago, when it was revealed they had selected the nickname “The Irukandjis” ahead of this summer’s Tokyo Games.
At the time, Layne Beachley, chair of Surfing Australia and seven-time world champion, said, “Our name and identity are powerful forces. As surfing enters the Olympics for the first time and enjoys incredible popularity worldwide, it was time to give our Australian team an identity that we can all rally behind. The Irukandji’s sting in the water is ferocious and that is how our Australian surfers approach competition.”
The Irukandji, a very ouchy, very small, jellyfish that makes its home in the country’s tropical waters, was self-chosen as nickname but then gifted by indigenous Australians. Senior Ranger of the Yirrganydji Land and Sea Programme Brian Singleton said, “The Irukandji jellyfish was named after the Yirrganydji people who were believed to be extinct but we aren’t! The Yirrganydji supports ‘The Irukandjis’ Australian surf team as they take on the world.”
Very cool but things took an even niftier turn, days ago, when it was revealed an official tagline had been added.
“Deadly in the Water™.”
Stephanie Gilmore, seven-time world champ, explained, “Irukandji perfectly suits our team as we try our best to be ‘deadly in the water’ against our rivals in the Tokyo Olympics.
At time of publishing, it is unclear if the United States, South Africa, France or Brazil have selected nicknames and taglines but it will be very difficult to beat “Deadly in the Water™.”
Maybe impossible.
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Can you step out the pronunciation for me
Well thats fucked , he wont pass the drug screening.
They should be called the blind mullets.
My uncle who was in the navy used to tell us about spotting them swimming under the ship with an unusual brown colour.
They mostly kill unsuspecting boomers on vacation what’s not to love about them?
My first and only suggestion is to explain to Laybe that she’s only a 6 time world champ
That name is so fucken cheesy
Julian already looks defeated in the cover pic. It’s good he has his expectations in the right place for once.
Jellyfish are also very soft & flaccid – if handled correctly can be terminated very easily!
I’m still giggling that the Irukandji inhabits waters of the non-surf producing FNQ. Resonates beautifully with the layman.
Narrabeen cam looks flat. Is that normal?
How’s the surf though?
I guess it looks pretty good. Idyllic for snorkeling. Working on joining the pro snorkeling tour.
GIMME an I – I
Gimme an R – R
gimme ahhh fuck it
Yeah ?
Who’s that ?
“the (insert unemployment benefit name here)”. I know blokes who have forged 40 year surf careers sponsored by the government and an annual lump sum from weed sales to get them indo for a couple of months.
The Doles, or the Doledrums
Should’ve revamped “The Bronzed Ozzies” and got Ian Cairns to Coach them
So as to be more current and relevant.
They’ll be lucky to get a bronze, more like the “Copper Ozzies” based on how well their team will do.
Who the heck is that sitting on the left ?
Seriously
WHO THE FUCK IS IT ? ! ?
Julian Wilsons Daughter.
She has his eyes.
Red and swollen from all the tears of defeat?
You NZers are are cruel lot, like the weather I guess.
The weather is cruel in NZ ?
Not up here in the winterless north…
About all I know regarding NZ is not much, watched a Torrryin Martin hour and a half doco where they rode motorcycles for thousands of KMs across New Zealand. Hailed and snowed half the time. Maybe they were trying to please their tent and clothing sponsors.
Or they were mainly in the shitty cold southern bit.
The weather difference is kinda like Seattle to San Diego, but flipped upside down…
I kept waiting for them to find some good waves.
i chuckled…
It thought it was a boy, maybe it’s Morgs, or someone else I wouldn’t have a clue who they look like ?
Shakira Westdorp. SUP-chick apparently. Not necessarily and Olympian, just member of Surfing Australia team.
Its not “fair” in todays world to only recognize those with talent. You have to recognize anyone who want to be recognized for anything they want to be recognized for. Kinda falls along the equal pay bullshit that has consumed the world of sports for some bizarre reason.
Ay ?
What the fuck ?
Is there gonna be SUPing at the Olympics ?
So the general public will actually think that’s surfing ?
Another reason why pro surfing is lame.
“it was time to give our Australian team an identity that we can all ‘rally’ behind”.
“The Irukandji’s sting is , ferocious, deadly, poison, “obnoxious”.
Black shorts, black shoes, green ‘collared’ shirt.
“This once noble sport has been turned into a big soggy cartoon”.
haha yep bout sums my beautiful brothers and sisters up hey?
Used to have the Australian junior tennis team travel to Nor cal and our club hosted them every year. Such good sportsmanship. Never saw such a good bunch of teenagers as the Au team.
I guess the sensitivity police frown upon national pride nowadays.
The Wozzle – Dead in the Water
Shit does not begin to describe all developments here.
I could be very wrong, but the old box jelly doesn’t even live in waters where there are surfable waves! Further the sting can be crushed by pouring coke on the affected area, If that devil elixir Red Bull would work also, the Kandji’s are fucked. Also, sis Steph just read the press release for her pull quote
““Irukandji perfectly suits our team as we try our best to be ‘deadly in the water’ against our rivals in the Tokyo Olympics.” This has the white (boring) Fijian written all over it.
It’s not the most noble of predators.
Yeah not in the least!
Even the Ripp’n Roos’s or something equally cringe would have been more passable. Even better, The Aussie Devils’s with a kickass tassie devil logo.
Aussie devils makes sense.
Neither are Wsl pro surfers.
Get psyched, it’s the summer Olympics. Remember Carl lewis etc? Not sure who’s on the team but lets Go America! What animal are we?
The Elo’s – our narrative will subsume any material reality.
All future Irukandji”s will be measured against these Irukandji’s. Can’t be pushy, like narratively speaking, no, “Deadly”. It won’t suffice to pivot to “Irukandji: You win some, you lose some. We’re Deadly Serious”.