There's a Wozzle problem with talent, or the lack of it. Guys retired three years should be not be in the conversation with hyped rookies or second-time rookies.
We didn’t get a great deal of meat on the bone for day One of the Newcastle Cup, let’s be honest.
Bit of aerial tomfoolery from current World Champ Italo Ferreira, a strong signal from JJF that he’s ready to throw down in whatever Mumma Nature sends his way, not at all spoiled by the best Hawaiian winter in a decade.
Otherwise, completely forgettable.
Today, thus, was a little more voluminous for the surf fan, starting with the surf size and shape, which was as exuberantly over forecast as day ones’ was unders.
Many, many moments where we could have been fooled into thinking we were watching Bells Beach. The thick, sloping outside wall which offered scope for two committed majors, was quite aesthetic, despite being tagged “fat and gutless” by heat winner Owen Wright and “flat” by Stephanie Gilmore.
Much dead water to plane across before a rambunctious shorebreak begging to be hammered shut.
No real dramas unfolded so a few scatter-gun observations to chew on below.
Straight up can we give props to rookie Isabella Nichols who accounted for Tatiana Weston Webb in Heat two of the round of sixteen. Some nice big chunky hacks, I want to say reminiscent of a female Matt Hoy if that were to be taken as a compliment.
But I was more impressed with the acumen of Nichols in the short profile piece they ran with the heat.
“I want to entertain,” she said.
My heart sang. She gets it.
Tyler Wright, most entertaining women surfer on Tour, also gets it.
I almost exploded on day one, when in a comment in the Booth she said she was sick of the pally-wally cutesy-wutesy charade of women’s surfing and wanted to bring more aggro, more naked competition and emotion to the caper.
It was like we were communicating on a telepathic level, the way Norman Mailer claimed he could do while watching TV in his seventies book Pieces and Pontifications. Rabbit Bartholomew was also suitably impressed. Joe Turpel managed to change the subject.
More on Tyler’s losing heat in a moment.
There were some rare moments of truth today from the booth. Well, Luke Egan leaning on the railings at least.
Egan took aim at the performance disparity between what he termed the “QS” surfers and the established CT stars. That was a fair reflection on reality specifically on Matty Banting, who had been relentlessly pumped up by the pre-tournament hype.
His failings as a CT surfer from the first go around were ruthlessly exposed on this go out in chunky, fat overhead walls.
No major turns. You can’t win heats at a CT level without big turns.
Compounding the failure were the two best surfers on Tour at almost perfect completion rates on 75% power turns. That being Adriano De Souza and Owen Wright. De Souza is retiring at the end of 2021, Owen was last runner up in 2011, a decade ago.
But they both made Banting look like a total amateur.
That sounds cruel. I don’t mean it to be.
There’s a Wozzle problem with talent, or the lack of it.
I saw a stack of CT-level surfing last year and by far the best of it was Mick Fanning. He would have won any heat out there today. He’s been flogging Ethan Ewing in mock heats all summer long.
Is this a problem?
I see this as a problem.
Guys retired three years should be not be in the conversation with hyped rookies or second-time rookies.
Julian looked great on day one in a losing heat. He looked better today. He easily smoked Mikey Wright and Jack Robinson, whose turn game in performance waves still looks a little jittery and staccato to my eye.
You could easily imagine a Tour with a start at Pipe and a finish at the Ments or Cloudbreak where Jack could rack up back-to-back Titles.
You can’t imagine him winning one at Trestles.
Tyler went back from the white Enough is Enough board of day one to a Forest Green Black Lives Matter sled for today.
It was a highly orchestrated thirty minutes. A continuation of her heat and appearance in the booth from nearly a week ago.
During that stint she evinced a heat strategy that would involve the bikini, as a method of trimming any excess weight from the board/body ensemble and allow for the maximum freedom of movement.
The first time I had heard of that strategy, but with an easy to follow logic.
I and many others will choose boardies/trunks over rubber for the same reasons. OK.
She also name checked the team strategy she and Micro had been working closely on and then proceeded to paddle out and sit in the inside rock break near the shorey.
Bugs was gobsmacked.
This is a “remarkable strategy” he claimed, calling it “dangerous” and “risky”. The problem was leaving the red wetsuited Courtney Conlogue out the back solo. There was obvious communication between Wright and Micro, and after Wright had shredded a trio of waves for a heat lead with twenty minutes remaining it looked like brilliant tactics.
Out the back she went.
All event commentators had over-cooked the importance of wave selection, when surfing performance was by far the telling factor.
In this case though, it was critical.
Conlogue cut her snaps short compared to Wrights by far superior full gouges but the large set wave that Conlogue rode for a flat seven was hard to deny.
Tyler sat and sat.
And sat.
Did she get cold in the bikini? Legs cramps a little? Was that a crucial tactical error?
I say, yes.
The winning wave came after a seventeen-minute wait and Wright over-cooked it. That fall was the end of the heat. A very good debrief awaits when they roll the tape on a heat she should have won.
Carrisa was dominant.
Marks did enough to join the dots in deteriorating conditions to get the W on Brissa Hennessy and the performance gap between men’s and women’s tours outside of wave of consequence continues to narrow.
A non-gendered wave pool comp has to be on the agenda.
Many juicy match-ups await in the mens round of thirty-two.
A rookie* bloodbath would be expected with Morgs v JJF, Julian v Jack, Medina v O’Leary, Kanoa v Ewing, Italo v Jackson Baker.
Some serious upsets if not.
A very good day awaits.
*And second timers.
I was going to bore you with Ivan from The Brothers Karamazov who comes to the conclusion that if one child has to suffer , then god , even if he/ she / it exists , does not deserve to etc etc ….but as a fan of the absurd I would say that this type of melancholy needs FISH SLAPPING …..So here it is
https://youtu.be/T8XeDvKqI4E
Jadson sure couldn’t ride it that way. Guy bogged more rail than an 80s coke party.
Yeah sometimes I can be a sanctimonious cunt, sorry to anyone i’ve pissed off. Except you Chas when you bang on about surfing starting in Peru. That still triggers me 😀
Jaddy is way worse, not sure why you are hanging it on Ace, he’s just a modern version of Damian Hardman but he can surf the barrelling lefts. Jaddy is a modern day Dog Marsh. Can throw buckets of spray but not an attractive surfer to watch.
Yet both Jaddy and Dog have done something that 2 million dollars are year for a decade have not given Kolohe … One CT VICTORY
Richard Marsh was only one Nicky Wood floater away from winning Bells too. I was a grommet watching that from the beach. He sat wide and Nicky had Rincon to himself. That little wave at the end where he floated over the backwash is what won it for him. I think it was in the Savage Cuts video. Rad at the time but a bit passe these days.
I surfed a lot with Dog at that time …..He gave me the best bit of surfing advice .
“Bicko , don’t play with the lip , SMASH THE FUCKING SHIT OUT OF IT EVERY TIME ! “
So I did , and keep it it mind everytime I approach the lip , even now at 55 .
Just to show how struggling financially ,future pro surfers were at the time …..
Dog needed to get to Victoria to surf in an Australian Titles but had car troubles …. 4 bald tyres in fact …. So he convinced my mate’s dad ,Brian Pringle , an absolute legend , that it would be a good idea to lend him 4 tyres so he could win the Australian Title , which would allow him to launch a pro career ….The tyres were lent … Dog won the Oz title and he is still frothing on pro surfing 35 year down the track ….no need for Red Bull to give him wings just the local green keeper to lend him rubber .
I feel like the reason Brazilians are dominating right now is that for so long they didn’t really have obvious idols to look up to.
For 20 years the Aussies have been trying to replicate Mick and Joel, rather than trying to blast through the performance ceiling.
While the Aussies are busy studying slow-mo replays at the HPC, Italo is catching 300 waves with jetski assist to see how many different combinations he can come up with.
I thought Italo’s performance was Slateresque in the …….
ATTENTION EVERYONE
“ THE SHOW STARTS NOW ! “
Ace gives the top men in the world enough trouble. There’s no way any of the women would be able to beat him on anything other than luck.
Ace may not be the most progressive surfer on tour, but he does what he does incredibly well. The more I watch him the more he impresses me, and the true beauty in his surfing often lies in the moments in between turns (or, should I say, the lack of in-between time, because often there is none and he’s on rail the entire time).
Add to that the fact that one of strengths is his ability to completely dismantle his opponents game plan and leverage their weaknesses, and you’ll find it even harder to name any woman that could beat him.
If we’re gonna single out a current day pro who Gilmore might beat it’s surely Jadson Andre, but even he has some pretty radical turns. He just doesn’t link them together very well.
I saw him doing it at 15 on a left rip bowl by himself at Avoca and he is still doing it TODAY …. You don’t stay on tour that long unless you win and keep winning
dude, i’ve seen her do WORK (courtney i mean) out front at my local significantly north of HB with her friend sage, and was viscerally gifted with watching these top-shelf-level women surf. RIPPERS for sure! better than 99.9-100%-110% percent of any man in the water, about 95-99% of the time.
The performance gap is still there but in future I’m guessing Surfing will be comparable to gymnastic in gender performance… Imagine Simone Biles after a year at Kelly’s pool…
First of all, she rips but that’s bullshit. Second, you introduce the word progressive and you change the subject. We are talking performance here.
I foot above the lip with low success rate let alone link to second manoeuvre i would question the impact on a overall 20 min heat.
Agree with Ace i just mentioned a few to get the ball rolling…
Tony Ray
Mark Sainsbury
Sunny Aberton
Pierre Tostee
I think the current top women would give a few of the late 1980s and 1990s male pros a real run for the money , thinking in no special order
Dog Marsh
Ritchie Collins
Mitch Thorsen
Stuart Bedford Brown
Archy
Basically any of the non regular top 16 , they had no contest savvy and pathetic preperation and fitness regime’s.
The top women now are contest smart well prepared and fit as hell with fine tuned surfboards.
Matt Archbold was a radical surfer, he just had no contest game (a lot like Dane Reynolds actually). Archie had only one speed and that was flat out. His airs were way more radical than Christian Fletcher for example, even if Christian’s skate grabs ended up being something we do see today. The only guy as good at airs as Archie was Martin Potter. The reason why they were seen so rarely back in the day was because straight airs were the only air that could be done on those boards pre-Slater, and they were almost impossible to land. Not once have I ever seen one of the women land a straight air.
Not once have I ever seen one of the women do a Richard Cram cutback either, and we’re talking mid 80s, almost 40 years ago.
Richie Collins had a bit of a clunky style but he did win both Bells and Santa Cruz, and that surfing in the Billabong pic (Filthy Habits?) is still pretty radical. Tom Carroll rated him one of his favourite surfers.
But yeah there were a bunch of guys in the bottom half of the top 30 back in the late 80s who the girls would probably beat. Simon Law, Tony Ray, Dog Marsh, Matt Branson, Glen Winton, Stuart BB, those guys didn’t have the greatest style. Hell, Gary Elkerton had that weird hand chop and he almost won the world title three times. But saying the girls in 2021 might beat a top 30 surfer from 1989 isn’t really saying the gap has narrowed. Doubt they’d beat many of those guys in big waves though.
If we were really saying the gap has narrowed they’d be surfing at the level of say Bobby Martinez or Rob Machado and there’s NFW they are anywhere near that.
We are not talking radical surfing we are talking winning heats take Mitch Thorsen great guy strong surfer but spent most of his time outside the top 30 never one a single event only won a handful of heats past the 1st round , now days he would not make the QS possibly regional level at best.
Let’s take a look at the guys you listed.
Richie Collins: won Bells, Huntington Beach and Steamer Lane. Made 8 finals. Not a shabby contest record at all.
Richard Marsh: One event victory and 4 finals (second at Bells the year Nicky Wood won).
Tony Ray: Won Lacanau (beating Kelly Slater), briefly won the Eddie until they realised they had tallied the scores wrong. Second at the Billabong and third at Margaret River. 5th at Hossegor.
Mitch Thorson: WA Juniors Champ in 1980 and 1981, placed 2nd Occy in the 1984 Pro Junior and was in the top 16 in 86 and 87.
Stuart BB: hard to find stats but did make semi finals six times and one final.
Archie only competed on tour for three years 89/90/91. Shit contest surfer but unbelievable free surfer.
mentioning the performance gap narrowing is really throwing out the challenge to the majority of readers “inner-stab comments section”.
i saw Caroline in the water at Dicko last week and i don’t think i’ve ever seen turns that fast and aggressive (**in a Dicko shorey, until ADS paddled out)
Ooops wrong string!
hey tom I want to respectfully challenge this issue you have with this “lack of exceptional talent.” issue…I have read your thoughts on it a few times over the year or two I have been in to these internet forums
yes there is a lack of exceptional talent…always will be…always should be…in anything…because that’s what makes it exceptional…or extraordinary. because its always relative…and always evolving
if many people were able to perform at what you now consider to be highly, exceptionally, extraordinary level of talent…it would no longer be considered so
I hope that makes sense, just my opinion
https://www.youtube.com/wat…
dam it…put to shame by a cartoon character…again
But it is a high quality Pixar character – so don’t beat yourself up to much!
Yep …If one actually ever surfs with guys on the top 100 on the QS ( I did a few years back at Boomerang ) one is absolutely blown away by just how much faster and harder and Higher they go … but …. if you compare them to the modern gods … let’s say Medina / Italo or Jonny then ….well, ….. they look somewhat more mortal .
Did you watch the ride? Would have been a standout for any normal year.
Welcome to the club!
I love the WSL Comps and everything about them, Laura out rosied Rosie seeya saffa.
I like Laura. She’s taken two jobs and made em into one. She’s from round your way yeah?
Norfy.
Top chik!!
Her brother … “ the Chicken “ did a great job commenting at One Mile with super slick CRISPY
I know the feeling homie. But cut yourself some slack. Half of the fun of this place is all the shit talk. When it really matters, everyone is on the same page.
Which of the women is close to italos performance level in small waves? Still wouldn’t win an u/14s boys comp.
Well, I said I would like to know of one actual incident. It just gets old listening to the claim that the women are close to the men in performance without pointing to any actual incident. You may not like “Ace” (as you say) and his surfing but he would still take a world title or 10 on the womens tour.
FA Shore!