Better than Bitcoin: Tesla x Matt Biolos surfboard records almost six hundred percent increase in value in three years!

Two free-market geniuses walk into a bar… 

Three years ago, Tesla and Lost surfboards announced a surfboard collaboration. Two hundred of ‘em. Fifteen hundred American shekels apiece, fins extra. 

Three hundred grand in potential sales.

Two days after the launch, all 200 boards had been sold, tech YouTuber Marques Brownless typical of the sorta consumer who’d buy a $US1500 Tesla board. Brownlee’s fans went nuts, the tweet liked 11,000 times and retweeted 800 times.

Now, that surfboard is worth around ten gees, according to a recent post on craigslist, the American classified advertisements website. 

An unopened six-eight El Patron with “a rounded pin tail allowing confident navigation in crowded line ups and wide variety of surfs” is for sale in Concord, California, a few blocks west of the Forgiveness Ministries and thirty miles east of homeless utopia San Francisco. 

The board will ship in its original wrapping, although, as per the original sale, FCSII fins are not included. 

Biolos said the collab happened after “one of the WSL athlete’s managers reached out and told me that Tesla was looking for someone to partner with on a ‘special surfboard’. ”

Matt says he had a little chat with the “Tesla people” and told ’em what was realistically possible, i.e. the sled wasn’t gonna have interplanetary ability or a built-in television screen.

“The bottom line,” said Matt, “is the boards are works of fully functional art. The Black Dart build is legit. They work really well. It’s such a true collab because we are delivering a sanded finish board and they do the flood/matte finish in the car factory! I’ve never really heard of a major product collab where both brands actually contribute to real construction and labor on the finished product. It’s not like Burton X Star Wars or anything.”

Biolos says while there was no direct contact with Elon Musk himself (note to reader: all three images featured in our stories have been manipulated in Photoshop) “he signed off on the concept and was well aware of our progress and execution and got the final approval.”