The 2023 Championship Tour all but settled.
I am currently mid-air, somewhere west of Atlanta with countless miles to go until reaching São Paulo. I feel myself getting softer sitting in this metal tube, idling my brain with Sex in the City re-runs. Weaker. Every minute weaker while former World Surf League CEO Erik Logan remains missing.
Where is he?
Did he not return from the country of Progress and Order on purpose, instead heading up the Amazon in order to find more young men with insane chest tattoos that he could wear? Is he being held against his will or is he kind of liking it? What are the reasons for his banishment?
Nothing.
Still no peep on his once-robust social media channels.
All quiet.
Well, while I’m forced to cool my heels, we can at least discuss Filipe Toledo’s victory of Ethan Ewing to claim the J-Bay crown and increase his stranglehold on the 2023 championship tour. If I can read World Surf League emoji correctly, it appears that he, Ewing and Griffin Colapinto have all, officially, stamped their inclusion in the Final Five day at Lower Trestles meaning the brave coward can sit Teahupo’o out.
Good for him.
It’ll be impossible to knock him off his pole position and can Filipe Toledo, the best small wave surfer on the planet, be undone twice in a row at baby Lowers?
Doubtful.
What did you think about the win?
Where’s Logan?
Just give me 20ish more hours of travel and I’ll know something.
Sex in the City.
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luge…
…hair salon or personal trainer who specializes in no-handed push ups.
cook book……sashimi or cooked, or both?
Colombia, but that was different situation. If I’m not wrong, it had to do with cartels. Back in the 90s, most major soccer teams is Colombia were run by druglords. Word is that it was related to that.
I truly hope so.
Tyler’s Eugene
Her wife! Married after lightning twelve-month courtship! https://beachgrit.com/2022/…
Don’t know if he mans up and charges a few bombs or if he mans up and admits to deliberately pulling out of the comp to avoid serious injury.
If he makes a decent living surfing ‘normal’ waves why would he risk losing it
That’s what I do minus making a decent living.
Sean you bang golden-era bond girls and sip vodka martinis for a living. Pretty decent in my books.
Charles, being the egotist that he is, begins his piece with, of course, himself. I gagged after one paragraph then quicky scolled down to the mor einteresting comments. No one gives a shit Charles. That being said, Toledo is streets better than anyone else on tour – particularly in waves of the head high to double overhead range. He’s faster, lighter, more critical and has the air game to match anyone. With the final in soft mostly rights it’s his to lose. No point him even going the Tahiti. Maybe an ‘injury’ or ‘mental health’ issues to materialise soon.
Bievenue mon petite amis, come for the shit article’s, stay for the bum fingering! xox
Isn’t Charles on some rescue mission that is taking him all the way to Rio?
It doesn’t matter, if he embarrasses himself at the games, he’ll become a national joke in Brazil. The public pressure on Brazilian athletes in major international competitions is no joke there. It has ruined careers and I’m not even exaggerating.
My question to Chas is, did you take your daughter with you?
When your bellend’s dripping foul green grot on your return from São Paulo you’ll re-read the closing line and chuckle.
ELO is in a safe space, with his SUP bros
🤙🏽🤙🏽
Go Gonzo or go home!
godspeed.
You know what happened to Hunter don’t you?
Indeed. He lived an exceeding full and interesting life.
as influential in my life as Wayne Lynch. would kick over at the chance to have a beer with…
(Chas)HST.My Uncle just back from Brazil
Apparently spent 1-2 hrs walking his house looking at random keys ??
i pray for your mental health Chas – god speed
he’ll bypass tahiti to let his injuries ,,,, ;;;;; heal, in anticipation of the 3ft festival in san clemente
I swear I heard a tremor in Fil’s voice and a stutter when he was told that he had provisionally qualified for the Olympics, and ‘gulp’.. Tahiti next year. Pussying out with a bunch of surfers watching a WSL webcast is one thing. Pussying out with the entire world watching you and embarrassing your overtly-prideful countrymen is a whole different story. There is little to no chance the ISA Committee sends out the Olympians in anything but heaving Chopes, as this will be surfing’s biggest and best opportunity to show how exciting the sport can be to the masses. I think a big part of it being pre-recorded is the flexibility to make sure there is proper swell to make for great tv.
lets hope so
calling it now..Gabby wins the Gold, full Terminator mode.
and re-runs of over-the-top daze as the live feed stops and goes…we’ll be right back! (to a head high left that just scored a 3.75 )
Hey Chas, ya might be off on a classic wild goose chase.
Apparently ELo has been seen around his home suburb of El Porto, next door to what looks like an oil refinery/fuel dump, just south of LAX and El Segundo.
https://uploads.disquscdn.c…
Maybe you should’ve just sat on the beach and waited for him to stroll past walking his pet poodle…
P.S.
What sort of ELo would live in a coastal industrial wasteland ?
I think I see him in the picture. Can’t miss his pink coat and tie and red designer reading glasses.
El Segundo Beer and Beef.
Oil refinery to the south, the massive sewage system for the city of Los Angeles to the west and LAX to the north…. small charming hamlet it is.
he could have done it much easier if he just bought the the big ‘ol ladder…. amirite?!
He’s holed up in Shit Pipe
Haha that’s some post apocalyptic Mad Max shit hey.
built in 1906…this single-family residence sits amongst towering tri-plexes, is downwind from the hyperion plant and chevron oil storage & processing plant, and is 3 blocks from some of the finest beach breaks north of Puerto. Fine restaurants abound and there is a nearby liquor store.
Many shiny superstars are your neighbors and rent is in excess of $10k/mo.
Vagrants & ELO need not apply!
https://scontent-sjc3-1.xx….
My concern is not Erik, Chas has got this.
What worries me is Tylers period.
Lily must be a saint, any news on Tylers socials?
Tyler would be surrounded by sycophants
ELO’s command of the WSL was terminated, with extreme prejudice.