“Snarky dark hearted desperation in every joke attempt.”
If it rains, it pours or so the expression goes.
Just a few months after the reappearance of ultra-masculine surf great Chris Malloy on our feeds following many years in the wilderness, when he went after a daddy who was transitioning his toddler from boy through to gal, let’s just say Chris ain’t one for gender fluidity, the fifty year old is back with a new target, Cocaine Bear director and actor Elizabeth Banks.
In 2017, Banks gave hell to Stevie Spielberg in a speech at Women in Film’s Crystal + Lucy Awards claiming he’d never had a female lead in all of his seventy or whatever films.
Banks’ speech got short shrift from the audience with one guest yelling out, “The Color Purple”, a Spielberg film starring Whoopi Goldberg and Elo’s old pal Oprah Winfrey.
Chris, as you know, is a former pro surfer, a climber of dangerous mountains and who makes fine documentaries and television commercials. He chews tobacco and had a childhood fantasy to become a saddle bronc rider until he saw a guy get gored in the groin and then bleed out. He ain’t exactly a slavish follower of progressive trends.
So when the speech resurfaced on Instagram yesterday, he dived head in.
View this post on Instagram
“This broad is always drunk and wrong,” wrote the fifty year old Central Californias. “Snarky dark hearted desperation in every joke attempt.”
It’s a damning summation of the storied actor and director whom you may have fallen in love with following her role as Beth, “the sexually uninhibited bookstore clerk” in the 40-Year-Old Virgin, and admired for her directorial take on a bear hopped up on seventy-five pounds of lost cocaine.
Chris Malloy, meanwhile, is a man of honour who left Hurley years back for Patagonia despite having to take a fifty percent payout.
“How did I bring up the slack? For a while when I first got married and moved back to my home town I got my commercial fishing licence and also worked on a pack string hauling gear into the back country on horseback. I’d come home after two days smelling like horses or fish and always like beer and with 200 bucks to show for it.”
What a man, yes?
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CHRIS MALLOY > YOU
You obviously didn’t get it.
Liz Hurley, Liz Shue, and at the end? Banks
this exchange is mo betta as Chas interviewing Pip…”I’m a dick on a case here… And got a bottle of rye in my pocket…Are you happy to see me?”
Do any of the ‘Momentum Generation’ have an IQ over 90?
No. And all involved have resorted to bizarre behaviour in later life to bear the shame at being part of it.
Malloys comment seems weirdly personal. They have some hollywood bad blood or something?
Just rank & file seppo wankers, Rich…
The Mallory’s are friends with that nitwit b grade brunette actress with big tits. I forget her name.
How does CM feel about Derek and Chas’s ummm fluidity?
they’re not trannies bru.
Man, people with a Hemingway complex are so sad. And he so rebelious and iconiclastic he makes ads to boot. Holy crap.
Leveling judgements on instagram is very a rugged, ultra masculine activity. Nothin like a hard day workin those finger tips on the ole’ phone screen. Is my beard growing longer as I type this? God the rush of commenting on stuff like a real man.
Specifically uses the words “this broad”. Remember being at a Halloween party near “backyards” and group of cali surfers dressed as basketball players with blackface followed by a videographer was outside dribbling and passing the ball around to stardom. Hate for that to comeback and haunt that boy.. My outfit you ask? Showed up in the form of “Save Sunset” sticker..
Brokeback Mountain 2 “malloys revenge”
Hear ye, hear ye….Show me someone here who hasn’t made a questionable post or comment while a few drinks deep and I will show you a liar.
More embarrassingly I do it sober. Xox
SC: you made a movie with a black lead actress? I’m drunk with jealousy…
Ticking all the boxes
VTA STRONG~
“Snarky dark hearted desperation in every joke attempt.” …He’s just summed up BG.
I thought it was a personal attack on ol’ Gil!
me? no me? me…
A very Slater-esque response!
Cheap funny character revealing!
Stanton as Lucky…”sincere, dark-hearted despo…” and that’s no joke. Next up, Paris, Texas
200 bucks after two days fishing?
He wasn’t doing it right.
Maybe not biting.
No one pays big bucks for trout.
Drunk and wrong. She sounds perfect to me.
And cute as a button!
you dropped ur walleto.
liz has ur credito~
we sent her home~
You’ll sleep with her later?