What a time to be alive!
The 2025 World Surf League Championship Tour season has rounded the bend into its home stretch. Only two events remain, the Corona Cero Open J-Bay in lovely South Africa and the Lexus Tahiti Pro quick on its heels. While it is too early to say what conditions will grace French Polynesia, scientists are telling us that J-Bay is set to PUMP when it kicks off this Friday.
Surfline, though largely staffed by dept. of weather n stuff community college dropouts now (so take with grain of salt), is predicting a 14 ft southwest swell at 13 seconds on the opening day growing to 17 ft at 15 seconds on Saturday. That should generate 4-6ft then 8-12ft surf for our heroes and heroines.
Jordy Smith, a local and current world number one, declared, “We all know J-Bay is one of the world’s best waves. More importantly for me, it’s a place to reconnect with old friends that I’ve grown up with my whole life. There’s a lot less pressure I put on myself. I spend my entire off-season there, I have a house on the beach, so it’s a very comfortable place for me, and I can surf with ease. To come in wearing the Yellow Jersey is epic. It’s testament to the hard work and sacrifices over the years, and we keep swinging and see how the rest of the year plays out.”
Yago Dora, Kanoa Igarashi, Italo Ferreira and Ethan Ewing fill out the rest of the “Final 5” but certainly look out for a newly energized Griffin Colapinto who is certainly working on rhymes, even as you read, to spit whilst “on the glass.
Came to J-Bay.
Yay.
What a day.
Waves pumping like two men.
At the gym.
Hey.
Don’t turn that frown…
I mean turn that frown upside-down.
Or some such.
Jack Robinson, at number seven, has seemed a bit off his game, lately, as has a quickly dropping Barron Mamiya, eight, though if anything can fire the Hawaiian regular-foot, it just might be cooking J-Bay.
Filipe Toledo, nine, is the real wildcard here. On one hand, he is a notable coward. On the other, he has won J-Bay three times. Another victory would vault him into the top five, ticket possibly punched to Fiji even if he elects to sit out the back at Teahupo’o and tremble. How do you think the li’l lion man will fare?
Do you have other thoughts about Corona Cero?
Also, is there a difference between “Pro” and “Open?”
Watch the warmups whilst conjuring answers.
Asking for a friend , has anyone ever encountered an actual white zaffa that is not wealthy ?
Well the poor ones ain’t leaving the joint. But yeah plenty there.
https://youtu.be/CY_Xf1kb-Q…
Similar for krakka Zimbabwean’s.
Don’t get either started on politics.
Or farming.
Hopefully some Great White Sharks show up and make Pro Surfing Great Again. That’s always exciting….
Perfect scenario would be Felipe winning j bay and jumping to 6th place in the rankings.
Then making it through first 2 rounds at Tahiti in 4’ surf and needing one more heat to make final 5 then, round of 16, a pumping 8’ swell with lots of west bowls arrives.
Talk about drama!
I would rather see him get eliminated in the elimination round at Chopes. He is a wasted spot at that event.
Seems like toledo and Igarashi would be wasted spots in the final 5, rather have robbo and griff in there.
PS. On the other hand, Jordy might have a better shot winning the title if igarashi and toledo are there
I don’t think Toledo will make the final 5. He’s most likely going to get a throwaway result at Chopes so even if he wins Jbay the other guys will probably be too far ahead. A guy like Jack Robbo is probably a better chance of sneaking in from 7th if he gets a decent result in Tahiti, which would seem likely.
Igarashi does seem the odd one out but he’s had good results in JBay. It’s gonna be hard to dislodge anyone unless they do a massive choke.
jeeze Twills, it is .03ft at home… rarest conditions.
had to bowl down and see it with my own eyes.
Well I’m down to last 16 in surfival. Smart money has to be on Ethan, right? Geez he looked good in the pre contest surf but will probably be up against cole housemand and he’s obviously in favour with the judges.
Griff has been in form but has a shit winning record here, maybe he’s better suited to beaches?
Tips requested!
Oh no way! Put it all on the White Chocolate melt king Jordy ha!
Xox
Already used him!
Depends on who you already used and who you want to save for Tahiti?
Tossing up between Ethan and fil. Can’t use Jordy as already used him.
How much would you hate on Fil if you choose him and he doesn’t get through..
Igarashi seems to do well here. Couple semis and quarters.
Pundits like saying how ‘tricky’ J-bay is for rookies, but, that’s why the pundits aren’t pros, tricky for them maybe! I’d rather have a rookie here than in Tahiti tbh
Fioravanti?
Frontside railgame underdog, “building a house” type. Conditions might suit
The problem is I have too many natural footers to use and you’d have to think the guys i’m up against are going to pick Ethan or Jordy if they haven’t used them already. So tempted to use Jack and hope everyone else bombs out but that leaves me light on for my Teahupoo pick.
I dont do surfival but see your point. I was initially going to suggest alan cleland! Wouldn’t count him out either
I’m no linguist, but Toledo is not a wild card.
I think he meant a wildcard to win it as in he has a good chance. Not a wildcard to the even itself.
Toledo did get a full season wildcard though.
Of course!
Say it to his face, tuff guy.
I think I disparaged a few professional surfers here. Which one?
The one that lives near you, but not the rapper.
Crosby Colapinto?
Get a selfie with Cole while youre there.
Fuck yeah, keep bitches in their place my Top G.
Xox
Hes just a black guy havin a go
I’d just describe him as a bit of a flog.
Xox
Yeah
Jake Marshall, obviously.
Mick?
So 1-2 then.
The WSL better be chumming the water. They need some headline appropriate, eye-widening action!
So double to triple overhead or chest to head high?!?
Double Jason Stathams
Thank you. Makes perfect sense.
In Australian that all translates to “4 foot”
Jordy’s to lose.
His last win there was 2011.
This year is Jordy’s year to lose, as it has been many times in the past. Consistency is key
Jordy ain’t scaring Anybody at cloudbreak. Backside tubes are not his thang
Ethan, Griff, maybe even jack, and of course Phil should all be right up there.
San Clemente Rap Game: Cringe Rap or Ebike Beatbox
gone are the days of death metal and punk…how sad.
Gadnium was a San Clemente metal band that was all time! In Wave Warriors 3 I think.
Into the night!
Looking forward to seeing the big man out there..
standing tall in yellow..
the true king of J Bay…
https://uploads.disquscdn.c…
Jeffrey
Do you think the black and white barbies share different shelves at Zaffa’R’Us?
Ol’ star trunk
The best post to ever grace this platform. Fuck.
Xox
Cheers
He will choke or be gifted scores to push him through its simply the way the WSL script runs.
Those eyes bear an eerie resemblance to his tits.
Sharks are also forecast to be 8′ to 12′ and growing as the event proceeds.
IIm looking forward to seeing Ethan Ewing fully open up his style if its pumping J Bay should be a magic thing to watch if he clicks in.
Can I get a huhhhhhhhhyeahhhhhhhhh