Mark Zuckerberg (pictured) being unfunny and sad.
Mark Zuckerberg (pictured) being unfunny and sad.

Mark Zuckerberg reportedly shattered after surf world ignores latest 4th of July wake stunt

If someone attempts comedy on a lake and nobody cares does it make a sound?

This past Friday was the 4th of July, in the United States, the time of year when patriots celebrate throwing off the English yoke and Mark Zuckerberg revels in being a dumbass. The world’s current world’s third richest man, worth north of $248 bn, stumbled into some real stupidity, three or such years back, when he wake surfed out front his Lake Tahoe compound holding an American flag. The moment went viral, as it were, and inspired the 41-year-old to reprise, year two, wearing a tuxedo and drinking a beer while holding an American flag.

Viral again and the giddy almost-real-boy decided to break out all the stops, dressing as a bald eagle Uncle Sam and captioning the clip “Is this the stupidest thing we’ve ever done?”

Unfortunately the surf world didn’t care.

The first two made much wake in our captive universe, Derek Rielly writing of the initial bit of cosplay,”A gift for Facebook founder Mark Zuckerberg’s almost eight million Instagram followers this morning with a video of a cartoon-like ‘Zucky’ e-foiling a boat’s wake, carrying an American flag and cut to John Denver’s Country’s Roads…” with many others joining in to comment.

The second fit feted by Rielly thusly, “Almost one year after Mark Zuckerberg completed a shock sweep of medals at a jiujitsu contest, the billionaire founder of Facebook and co-owner of Instagram, has returned to his surfing roots with a July 4 post showing him in a tux chugging a beer while surfing and hoisting the stars and stripes.”

Again, a who’s who of surf talent

But this latest round?

Absolute crickets.

Stab didn’t cover. Surfer didn’t touch. Not even perpetually creepy The Inertia deemed the silly skit worth jot nor tittle.

The comments, themselves, on Zuck’s now 15.7 million strong following bereft of typical additions by Jamie O’Brien, Raimana Van Bastolear, Kai Lenny etc.

A very sad day for the nerd who flew too close to the comedy sun, bald eagle wings melted by the genuine not-funniness of it all.

Single tear down cheek emoji.

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rocky c
rocky c
1 year ago

“Stab didn’t cover. Surfer didn’t touch. Not even perpetually creepy The Inertia deemed the silly skit worth jot nor tittle.”
maybe because these sites are liberal beehives where anything remotely related to Trump is not allowed?

Firelipe Torpedo
Firelipe Torpedo
1 year ago

At this point if you didn’t almost kill yourself with a firework I couldn’t care less how you celebrated the 4th

RJ
RJ
1 year ago

congrats on getting blocked by kai lenny

Wave Wizard
Wave Wizard
1 year ago

Does he really need our attention? He has all the money and our data.

Skippy
Skippy
1 year ago
Reply to  Wave Wizard

Sadly that’s the only thing he’s ever wanted.

mike m
mike m
1 year ago

Jordy dropping in on some poor chump at :26. C’mon homie!!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5eUkqnFjlDM

Kama'aina
Kama'aina
1 year ago
Reply to  mike m

Ethan’s last turn and the ender from the goofy foot! Wow!

NEGATRON
NEGATRON
1 year ago
Reply to  Kama'aina

Who was the Goofy? Yago??

Low wide stinkbug stance
Low wide stinkbug stance
1 year ago
Reply to  NEGATRON

Is it Miggy?

NEGATRON
NEGATRON
1 year ago

Yeah I thought that first too, then he flared so hard I thought it must be Yago. Think you could be right though.

Sean Connery
Sean Connery
1 year ago
Reply to  NEGATRON

That last turn was psycho. Volcom sticker on the nose.

NEGATRON
NEGATRON
1 year ago
Reply to  Sean Connery

Must be Yago then?!?

Low wide stinkbug stance
Low wide stinkbug stance
1 year ago
Reply to  NEGATRON

It’s Yago. Don’t mind me!

Kama'aina
Kama'aina
1 year ago
Reply to  NEGATRON

Couldn’t tell

Dogsnuts
Dogsnuts
1 year ago
Reply to  mike m

Cunt!
Xox

deeks
deeks
1 year ago
Reply to  Dogsnuts

Yep that was blatant as fuck ! ” I’m off jordy. “
(t shirts available soon)

Dogsnuts
Dogsnuts
1 year ago
Reply to  deeks

He almost became relatable!
Xox

NEGATRON
NEGATRON
1 year ago

When I was a Grom I used to have 20 Surf stickers on my first car. Now I have zero. Zuck like I, at peace with being, not proving ourselves to be Surfers?

astro
astro
1 year ago
Reply to  NEGATRON

Hmmm, one’s a billionaire. Ones living amongst old peeps in a whyfuckamoocow town. It’s a struggle for me to relate the two of you.
Otoh, one’s a semi good cunt but inclined to be cuntish at times. The other ones just an arsehole. That’s a lot easier.
But yea, no stickers seems to be the only bond between you.
You could always start liking him on book face and become the latest Kai Lenny.

Beef & Beer
Beef & Beer
1 year ago
Reply to  astro

So you’re saying that Zuck’s …”a semi good cunt but inclined to be cuntish at times.” ?

Crikey, and I thought he was always made out to be a fuckin’ dick, obviously not…

Low wide stinkbug stance
Low wide stinkbug stance
1 year ago
Reply to  NEGATRON

No one wants to look like a surfer anymore. It’s all about looking like a tech bro.

Picard Madeoff
Picard Madeoff
1 year ago

I try hard to look like an out of shape middle aged Boomer

Stick man
Stick man
1 year ago

Fuckin nerd!

Top Cunt
Top Cunt
1 year ago

If someone attempts comedy on a lake and nobody cares does it make a sound?

Only if a Surf Journalist reports it

Chas Smith
Chas Smith
1 year ago
Reply to  Top Cunt

I refused to show the stupid clip, though, so it only made a sound adjacent!

Kama'aina
Kama'aina
1 year ago
Reply to  Chas Smith

Adjacency is the new core

Sean Connery
Sean Connery
1 year ago

Imagine liking or even worse commenting on a Zuck post. Special humans.

Beef & Beer
Beef & Beer
1 year ago

Reminiscing

This brings a tear to the eye

https://uploads.disquscdn.c…

Jack English
Jack English
1 year ago

Scotty Stopnik riding a longboard at Bolsa Chica https://uploads.disquscdn.c…

KnostMalone
KnostMalone
1 year ago
Reply to  Jack English

A classic! Blast from the past.

Jack English
Jack English
1 year ago
Reply to  KnostMalone

thank you Knost – I like your surfing!

Barrelled
Barrelled
1 year ago

Based on the lame caption and the fact that the vid cuts to not showing faces, I’m guessing that ain’t Fuck wake-surfing in that stupid suit.


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