"Give us your tired, your poor, your huddled masses yearning to own a piece of wave-generating tech for $1,047.80."
So yesterday, David Lee Scales and I were chatting (listen here), as we do twice a week, and I began marveling, aloud, about how none of the wave-making technologies have come to dominate the market yet. We have Kelly Slater’s plow, Tom Lochtefeld’s air cannons, Wavegarden’s hydrofoils and levers, plus others that I can’t remember. At this point, I was thinking, one of them should have separated from the pack and become the de facto standard for the majority of new builds.
A bold man could take advantage of the current neck-and-neck situation and throw some money behind the Rusty Plunger. Surf Lakes‘ proprietary wave-making technology, a large rusty plunger that makes waves by going up then down, is the only wave-making technology open for investment to plebes.
“Surf Lakes is happy to announce that our first Reg CF round is open!” the team announced back in May. “What does this mean? Anyone in the USA (over 18) can invest, with a minimum of just $1,047.80. For the first time, we are opening our doors to the general public, giving everyday investors a chance to be part of the next generation of wave-making technology. For Australians, we have a similar offering coming for you soon.”
$1,047.80? Even a poor bold man could maybe scratch that together but he better hurry for the funding round closes in five-ish days.
According to Surf Lakes, the surf tourism market is an “untapped $65 bn opportunity.” Eight rusty plunger licenses have already been sold, including Las Vegas, Dallas and Oahu. Investors will see a return on that $1,047.80 because Surf Lakes is “enabling developers to build profitable parks with unmatched wave capacity, a business model that combines upfront licensing fees with recurring income from operations and partnerships.”
360,000 social media followers are also dangled as an asset.
So?
Are you in?
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Wavepool on Oahu.
Coals to Newcastle.
It’s for tourists, not actual surfers.
There were 5.61 million tourists to O’ahu in 2023 – that’s 5.61 potential customers for a plunger wave pool.
If I wanted to watch my hard earned cash PLUNGE then I would invest. The only thing I’ll ever invest in surfing is my time.
If they had their shitt together enough to open up Yeppoon to the public- I’d think about it- throw in a Barra fishing mission on the ole muddy Fitzroy.
Otherwise, it’s just yapping.
Choppy close?
Chopper Read?
which Choppy?
James “Choppy” Jennings?
So let me explain who this Choppy actually is. He is one of the biggest cunts I have ever encountered in my entire life and completely fucked the last surf forum I was a part of. It was a great site and full of amazing characters from all around the world but this one scumbag just completely fucked it.
We tried ignoring him, we tried giving him heaps of shit but he would just get banned and come back under a different name so nothing worked. Negs used to be on there from time to time so might know who I am talking about.
We lost soooooo many good people and then the forum shut down I guess cuz of Donnys lack of love for free speech. Fight the power cunts and if thats you Angry ya ledge stoked to see ya again ya sick cunt yeeeeeeeeeew
I don’t remember who as it seemed in the last couple of years the commentary turned into a mess and I didn’t look that often, that and I quit playing Fantasy on that format as 99% of the crew I played with either quit or moved to the WSL one. Anyway, anyone is welcome to come here but I’ll have zero tolerance for the lame characters and their old arguments to continue on here. That shit died with the forum.
what forum was that?
Surfer mag had two forums. One main one and a separate website for their fantasy surfer with attached forum.
Youre safe Negatron they will never come here and you just wipe them out anyway. Some good crew on there who I will miss but losing that game format is a shocker cuz I always loved it and the WSL one is sooooo fucked I refuse to play it
Hey Chunks – one month no old Surfermag forum.
I do have a little more time in my workday now, haha.
-ccru
GDay CCRU
Your prize is coming mate
Good to see ya brother, can ya email me your address so I can send your prize yeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeew
Gday Chunks
Here we are in a better place
“Choppy” already copped the ban mate
Hahah
I reckon you’ll be writing for them soon….
Beachgrit look here!
Next writing talent is Strayan Cunt
Good to see ya brother yeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeew
Right on Negatron
Strayan cunt is a good cunt.
You shoulda seen the abuse he copped from “Choppy”
He can’t survive here
And being open, I was the “Choppy would go” handle
It was an inside joke, just saying I recognize Chunks from the dead forums…. Hahaha
Please don’t delete me again. Strayan cunt, vouch for me
New start here so don’t even bring up the idiots or they’ll come.
Understood 100%
Hahahaha he certainly would
I’d rather “invest” the thousey on an 8 ball of nose beers and a cuppla cartons than waste it on that shit ay
Buy the dip!
I think I still have an outstanding bet with a friend that Mr Webber was going to produce a better wave than the bald dude, might be time to pay up.
I wouldn’t even pay a dollar to surf a pool let alone chip a thousand into one that I’d never see again
The surfer having the most fun is the one plunging Yeppoon.
put the cream of sumyunguy in yepoon!!! https://youtu.be/ZrBkEvk97Hc?si=KmiCVJLWR5TsAILT
Looks fun.
Pretty styly airs!!
If I had a spare $1000 I’d definitely stick it in Yeppoon
Hey hey its Saturday! time for a list of things to do;
stick rusty spike in eye
dig 4′ trench with toothpick
buy share in wave poo l
If I had more than -300 bucks in the bank right now I’d…. go buy a fish taco.
Twice a week? Really? Twice a week? Sounds exhausting.
You should listen and get exhausted too!
I do listen, keep up the good work!
I’d by a single membership unit and report on the experience, but start ups seeking private funding always stich their investors up with NDAs
I piss in pools
I stole a rusty plunger from Neg’s truck for free. Even came with free lube.