Brave warrior undertakes epic quest to US Open of Surfing in Huntington Beach

"A good plan for leaving is just as important as for arriving."

Recently, I was in Huntington Beach, California to see some professional surfing.  

It was the Thursday day of competition of the US Open with Kanoa Igarashi in the final heat of the day.  

Swell is pumping and the water is warm so naturally like a pissy chick speeding up to the entrance of a Starbucks drive-thru I couldn’t wait to arrive in HB and witness a small portion of this years’ US Open of Professional Surfing presented by every beer company ever and other stuff live in the flesh.  

But where do I park my Toyota Tacoma 4×4 that I occasionally use to California Coastal UBER? Do I park near the downtown? Northside? Southside? Eastside? Santa Cruz has a “Westside” but I’m not aware of one in HB. Prolly one, just unaware if so. And on a day like today there’s no way Jose (if that’s still ok to say?) I’m parking near downtown Huntington Beach. So much freaky jeeky blowing in the wind ‘round there, best to anchor the Tacoma away from potential riots and or summer “teen takeovers”.  

So just like Odysseus in the hit film “The Odyssey ”(spoiler alert) when he parks his personal boat slightly more offshore than the other boats before approaching the Laestrygonians, I’m reminded that Matt Damon and Greek literature is currently teaching all of us a solid life lesson… a good plan for leaving is just as important as for arriving.  

Driving slightly south 1.2 miles from the HB pier, I pull into the “Huntington Beach State Park” entrance that’s located off Beach Boulevard and Pacific Coast Highway number 1.  Why “slightly south”?  It’s simple. The city of HB owns the beach area around the pier. Plus, Trump gifted the city a desalination plant during his first presidential term so obviously HB = chaos. You may remember the old desalination plant in HB. It’s in those scenes with Archy and Dino hiding from the wind, smoking cannabis under a towel, from the 1991 hit film “Point Break” now back in theaters with a “35th Anniversary Edition” and 4K. 

Anyhoo, seeking parking I roll up to the CA Beach Blvd. State Park kiosk entrance, “roll” down my window, beep my newly renewed “California “Explorer” Yearly Parking Pass” and am validated for any “Day Use” parking at any of the California State Parks (owned by the US Federal Government) at any time for the next 12 months for $195. On the way south down the wonderful California coastline to the comp I was able to make $48 UBERing but still have yet to receive potential tips to cover the full cost of gas. (side note: nothing feels better to an UBER driver who gets that 3am phone ping saying, “You received a tip!” so please tip your driver if you arrived to your destination safely because you made it there (hopefully)). 

Parked, I smoke a quick pier bowl, then head to the comp riding my new Sector 9 surfskate. Sector 9 skateboards are based in San Diego, California and have sponsored and made Joel Tudor “signature” skateboards.  My Sector 9 surfskate should be allowed in the contest site even though Joel still isn’t? 

Oh the questions!  Oh the humanity!

Am I here solely for the US Open presented by beer, other stuff, a random commercial for West Oz, and Huntington Beach?  

No.  

I’m mainly in HB because my current Central California Coast neighborhood water temp is 55 degrees and still 4/3 season. It’s a place where Super El Niño warm water temps never reach and south swells can reach in sporadic spots. A cold, dark place 151 miles west from Lemoore. Yup, that place where there’s a ton of cowboy/surf cosplay and an area code named beer.  

I’n a nutshell, I need to get loose in some warmer juice before the Fall season like a big baby who needs a warm water ocean-bath-baptism-scrub. There’s no “i” in team but there’s a “tism” in “baptism,” a different blogpost for a different time. I surfed for 2-hours at a familiar reef around Carlsbad, a place the WSL hasn’t stained (yet) and feel baptised. 

Anyhoo, current water temp in HB is 70 and the air temp is 77 according to Kevin Wallis. Today, there’s a Pacific Ocean hurricane named “Genevieve” spinning off Mexico generating somewhat symmetrical lines. Chris Cote coined her a “super swell.”  She’s currently mixed with a tad of west accompanied by a full moon which translates into irregular period cycles and likely a white wine spritzer drinking bitch of a storm currently headed toward Hawaii. 

OMG!

Full moon in July. Hurricane Genevieve. WSL at HB for a week.  Sounds like perfect conditions for weird corpo surfing to digress into next level vampire neckbeard “bite and suck mode” in much need of Britt Merrick and his ability to take on Satan.  Satan may ask him about the naming of the “CI +/- Pro”.  Minus?  Why so negative bro?  Like Chas “I’m no fan of the Grateful Dead” however may Jerry Garcia descend with his ice cream and protect us all from the vampires.  “The entire industry is here!” Exclaimed broadcaster Mitch but the real question is will Britt Merrick appear or is he off hunting protein so he can eat meat while in Tahiti.  I don’t know. If he only eats meats he kills himself then he’ll need to stock up pre-Tahiti and ship it over via airplane or boat.  If I were him I’d contacting the Malloy bros for Yetis.

Speaking of California sunshine…

I was born the same year in California as Chas and professional surfing, 1976, making us all Gen X babies. After high school my mom kicked me out at 18 and in 1994 I moved to Huntington Beach, paid $65 a month for a shared room, surfed, drank espresso, and played in a hardcore straight edge band alongside all of those other bands from the early mid 90’s HB that now post-Covid get paid $8,000 a show and drink alcohol. Would the American “Straight Edge” movement of the 1980’s and 90’s have existed if the legal drinking age was lowered to 18 in the US? Prolly not. Laws are laws I suppose and gives us boundaries. Joe Foster, if you’re reading this, thank you.  

Did I compete at the pier? Yep. South and Northside at several one off Pro/Ams. No Rockin’ Fig on the mic but still fun. Did I advance? Yep. I made the semi-finals once because the 1st and 2nd went Slater on each other and got double interferences catapulting my 4th place position in 2nd. Thanks life for the lemons but I couldn’t squeeze them into finals lemonade.  

At this years’ US Open, I didn’t see a skate ramp or any BMX’ers but the music stages are set and ready. Allah-Las is one of the musical acts playing this year. I once heard a groovy tune of theirs on a Tommy Guerrero Pandora Radio “station” and liked it. They came through my current town in 2025 and I paid $36 to see what they’re about.They all met as employees working at Amoeba music (Los Angeles store) proving even musicians need friends. Standing on the pier I overheard someone say “They had 3 stages last year and only 2 this year.” One less stage for mediocre music is a good thing IMO. 

At the start of the comp Longboard commentary team claimed that ”Machado’s Peak” named after Rob, a peak that sits 200 years south of the pier, is actually “Nuuhiwa’s Peak” named after David. Classic HB v. Santa Cruz Surf City battle scenario bringing us all back to the current July full moon and vampires.  

In the 1987 hit film “The Lost Boys’ featuring Corey Feldman was filmed in Santa Cruz, California. They are another claimer of being “Surf City, California” alongside HB. If unfamiliar and still interested this was a hotly debated topic years back between HB and Santa Cruz and who is the true “Surf City, California.” Textbook branding city corpo vampire shit. Years later now add Punta Roca, El Salvador becomes another Pacific Ocean costal spot claiming “Surf City.” When will these three just fuck already cause Mama Roca ain’t havin’ it and if at the comp site after dark I wont have any fresh garlic but one of the devout Christians shouting at the surf shops to repent from their greed most likely is carrying a cross. I do have a pocket full of sunlight though.  

Most corpo surf vampires looking for the next Kelly Slater know that “Rising Tides” is a WSL surf program designed to encourage young girls to start surfing, get corpo sponsored, and make others in the industry cash.  During the broadcast they mentioned they’re adding boys to the program which is so cool because boys are often excluded from these types of gender specific gal youth programs. What could go wrong?

This installment as in past The US Opens’  is sponsored by “Hoag.”  If unfamiliar you might think it’s a new brand of pig milk sponsoring professional surfing events but it’s actually a hospital. They have an “activation” called “Hoag 360” where you walk into a structure and do something that prolly tells you you have cancer you didn’t know about. I didn’t go in because I swear I saw 4 people go in and never exit. It also may have been the mushrooms. No one really knows.  

After a can of Modelo Negra at $12, l tell a few folks at the “Beach Bar” that I’m working on an “article” for a surfing blog that has maybe 16, 17 viewers tops. They all chuckle and I start to depart.  

My current i”Phone” works pretty good so I start looking for a departing photo to add to the “article” that sums up the 2.5 hours spent in Huntington Beach. Ah, a bulldozer carrying an outhouse.  Good, but still doesn’t quite capture the essence of the moment.  

What’s around me and this beach that can I take a photo of that really encapsulates one man’s Odyssey to the 2026 US Open? The sun is setting, therefore, an increased risk of vampires is rapidly becoming a gnarly reality in this town. It’s 68 degrees and the object I want to photo is resting between two full blazing fire pits with S’more smells.  

I gingery hop through the sand, snap the photo, and found everything I was hoping for and more in Huntington Beach.

Song of the comp?  Missy Elliot “Work it” in celebration of Anastasia Ashley twerking year’s back.