The barrel of your life. Paddler is sucked backwards and puts you in a cartwheel to destruction. Your response?
It’s been a while since the last installment of What Would You Do? Mainly because I haven’t been able to think of anything good. There isn’t much variety in the surf experience, couldn’t come up with anything realistic. Don’t want to get too weird with it. Start writing stories about trans-mermaids luring men into underwater fuck palaces.
But I’ve got something today! With a video demonstration to boot. Easy to keep it short and sweet.
So… you’ve locked in to a world class stand up barrel. Easy roll-in entry, big open section you could make it through with your eyes closed. This is the type of shit most surfers dream about, never actually experience.
You toss a subtle hand drag to set up, get your line locked in. So deep, so easy. So long as you don’t do something stupid, like bail for no reason, you’re gonna be flying out in a few seconds with your heart in your throat and a mental image that’ll last for decades.
Every eye in the lineup is on you. You’re gonna be a hero!
One guy is so wrapped up in your feat of derring-do that he paddles mid-face then…just…stops.
He’s staring right at you, all forward momentum gone. Three more strokes and a duck dive would have put him safely out the back. Instead he pokes the nose in from a dead stop, doesn’t penetrate, then starts getting sucked back over the falls.
His board comes flying backwards into the barrel, whacks you in the face, and sends you on a hell cartwheel to destruction. Turns a beautiful situation into something that’s about as bad as it can get. Excepting an imaginary world where the trans-mermaids grab you while underwater and bundle you off to their fuck-palace.
Your board’s broken, your face hurts like a motherfucker, and Mr Doofus is reeling his board in right next to you.
What would you do?