"We couldn't be more excited to head to Lemoore, California this summer!"

Breaking: Jack White’s The Raconteurs to play the Freshwater Pro*!

*Formerly The Founders Cup.

And the media blitz has begun for what the World Surf League is now calling a “rodeo.” Sponsored content popped up in my instagram feed, hued brown, and declaring, “The rodeo is riding back into WSL Surf Ranch for summer’s biggest showdown**. Get stoked for the #FreshwaterPro brought to you by @outerknown. Get tickets etc.”

The video shows cheering crowds, splashing kids, professional surfing and the general public enjoying the festival-like atmosphere of Kelly Slater’s Surf Ranch in Lemoore, California.

Jack White’s band The Raconteurs are also the promised headlining act of the night’s action.

Do you remember last year when it was Blink-182*** but they dropped out and were replaced by Social Distortion?

I do.

I was there, though I left before the concert, to witness the spectacle and will say it was enjoyable-ish but will also say I won’t be back.

Too hot, too ugly, too monotonous, too far away.

Will you go?

And how do you feel about The Raconteurs?

Yay or nay?

*Formerly The Founders Cup.

**Keeping with the “ranch” theme, don’t you think the copy-writer meant “hoedown” instead of “showdown?”

*** Is Blink-182 really Blink-182 without Tom DeLonge? To me it’s not but I don’t recall officially deciding together.

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Phat-wan kerr
Phat-wan kerr
7 years ago

fun fact. when they tour in australia they use the name saboteurs due to an Australian band who already uses raconteurs.

Gadoot
Gadoot
7 years ago

Stock it with VALs, SUPers, and foilers all made of fiberglass and foam rubber with little motors that scoot them randomly around the pool like those robot vacuums. The competitors can spray, knock over, air over and push over for extra points!

Greebnurt Hurkurmurgurt
Greebnurt Hurkurmurgurt
7 years ago

CB and Chazz MM both bowed out and announced their departure from commenting. CB because he was discouraged about surfing and felt like a kook because he couldn’t surf as good as he used to. And maybe a couple boards he paid top dollar for, and they didn’t work for him. He felt like he shouldn’t be commenting on a surf site if he could barely surf anymore.
Chazz announced his hiatus, but I kind of forget why.
But Scott SD, his absence is cause for concern. But I wouldn’t worry too much just yet, he’ll be back soon probably. Maybe on a road trip, busy visiting the kids, or just working plenty. That’s how it goes for me sometimes, then binge read the past weeks BG in one evening.
Or maybe….they are just out there actually surfing????

Sampson
Sampson
7 years ago

I wish Jack White would quit fucking around and just find a replacement for Meg. White Stripes were amazing but everything he’s done since has been painful…

samwaters
samwaters
7 years ago

Hahaha–a surf contest where you can’t even walk down the beach cool off and catch a few waves yourself–
dismal–pathetic…………

samwaters
samwaters
7 years ago

No no no–let the people ‘attending’ fish in-between sets–they might sell alot more tickets if you get a chance to catch and take home a Bass……

Toin coss
Toin coss
7 years ago

I’m genuinely interested in knowing who pays to go to this event. Some good hard numbers. Throw in the industry bros too, by all means. What on earth is giving the WSL hope that this is viable? Is it soccer Mom’s and soccer dads that make the turnstiles swing? Who who who??? Wannabes? Hasbeens? Vegas families? How many Industry bros are connected and at what level? 100 degrees, cow shit aroma, Michelob Ultra? I really want to surf it, truth be told, but hanging out, WTF??? Never.

Thruster longboard
Thruster longboard
7 years ago

I got money on Mikey Wright if we’re doing like that

Preston
Preston
7 years ago

Oh, this is perfect. Todd Klein can back his boat right into the pool and do live interviews and shit while fishing for stocked bass.

MaxNeoprene
MaxNeoprene
7 years ago

Peter King looks like Lurch.

MaxNeoprene
MaxNeoprene
7 years ago

This just in..Jack White has bailed and is replaced by Jack Black. Tenacious D is a much better fit for the event

Chief Hot stuff
Chief Hot stuff
7 years ago
Reply to  MaxNeoprene

Ha
Most def!

m0rt
m0rt
7 years ago
Reply to  MaxNeoprene

This is not, The Greatest Wavepool in the World, no.
This is just a tribute.

Owen's Outgoing Tide
Owen's Outgoing Tide
7 years ago
Reply to  MaxNeoprene

they’ll be playing under their new name: social conformity

KRIS
KRIS
7 years ago

oh yeah. and what a drummer!

Magnum
Magnum
7 years ago
Reply to  KRIS

She’s technically terrible. But good, sophisticated drumming would have ruined what made the White Stripes so great.

KRIS
KRIS
7 years ago

yaaaaaaawwwwwn. this is were it’s at:

https://youtu.be/cIEJKJNHChw

Nick Carroll
Nick Carroll
7 years ago

Sadly I can’t attend either.

But can I warn any of you who do. Be extremely suspicious of that lake swimming thing. It’s a brain amoeba waiting to happen.

Chief Hot stuff
Chief Hot stuff
7 years ago
Reply to  Nick Carroll

Can someone push Kelly in there so Caio gets his spot back?
Go on Chas.

Rightdownthegooch
Rightdownthegooch
7 years ago

What were they doing under that pier? And why the shoes? they look like they’re pretending to walk.

Rightdownthegooch
Rightdownthegooch
7 years ago

Bummed 3rd Eye Blind and the Cardigans turned down the gig.

Gadoot
Gadoot
7 years ago

Matchbox 20?

Magnum
Magnum
7 years ago
Reply to  Gadoot

Sugar Ray and Smashmouth together at last (again).

Wilbur
Wilbur
7 years ago

See this is what the WSL needs…fresh ideas. Also they could get cross market synthesis by having tandem surfing. Get Gabby on a board with bubba up front casting his line. Waves would be scored on fish weight and tube time.

OffRocker
OffRocker
7 years ago
Reply to  Wilbur

“He’s racing down the line, maybe looking for an aerial, but it’s too fast for a trolling lure… Bubba is jigging relentlessly while trying to feed out line…. no wait hang on… Medina is stalling for the barrel, they have slowed down, the lure has sunk and set well…. and BANG there it is ! A massive hit from behind the curtain, the team from Brazil hasn’t hooked a tubular 20 pounder… that’s gonna be hard to beat Joe!”
“Yes. It’s. The. Top. Turn. Bottom. Turn. Combination… We’ll. Be. Back. After. The. Break.”

Chief Hot stuff
Chief Hot stuff
7 years ago

Didn’t you know?
They were stooges made up by beachgrit, to encourage controversy. And anarchy.

longtom
longtom
7 years ago

If Kelly tandems Jack White, whats the correct protocol: Kelly up front or Kelly behind?

SlickSaintNik
SlickSaintNik
7 years ago

I heard it’s blazing hot, there’s no shade and it smells like cow shit. Can we have Trestles back please!?!?!

Wilbur
Wilbur
7 years ago
Reply to  SlickSaintNik

I’ve done work at Lemoore. Theres a Navy base up there. Everything you said is correct.

Lucky Al
Lucky Al
7 years ago
Reply to  Wilbur

Are the bars of Lemoore “target-rich environments”?

https://www.youtube.com/wat…


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