We're real geniuseses!
And I am fresh back from Copenhagen then Paris, jet-lagged and droopy with and undercurrent of pure rage bubbling just below the surface. Rage because we had a quick layover in Dallas/Fort Worth and I got pulled into extreme secondary, as always happens, while my family trotted off on happy adventures.
Oh I kid, there are no happy adventures in the Dallas/Fort Worth airport, only America writ awful. Zeke Elliott jerseys etc. Tito’s Vodka etc. And, truth be told, I had the better time because while in extreme secondary I feasted upon Longtom, Matt Warshaw and Surf Ads going back and forth, back and forth on the addictive nature of surfing.
It was all perfection and I don’t mean to spoil it now with a jet-lagged, droopy thought but I just have to add that surfing… surfing… the Pastime of Kings which gifted us Spicoli, Mick Fanning and Kanoa Igarashi is not physically addictive but rather mentally addictive and I don’t mean in a “I-think-about-surfing-all-the-time-cuz-I-wanna-get-toobed” sort of way but in a proper academic, scholastic, philosophical, intelligent sort.
Imagine that.
Mick Fanning.
Mick Fanning.
But it’s true. Longtom is well-read, brilliant, salty surf dog and can’t stop thinking about it. Matt Warshaw went to Berkley, is the son of math geniuses, has a brilliant wife and can’t stop thinking about it. Surf Ads, though I’ve never met him, is for sure is the smartest man in every room and can’t stop thinking about it. Jen See, Dr. Jen See, has a PhD in history and can’t stop thinking about it. Ricmatic, The Animal Chin, Audit in Progress etc. I can’t and won’t reveal identities but, again, brilliant and/or have brilliant wives, successful and can’t stop thinking about it.
You can’t stop thinking about it.
It’s not that surfing grabs our bodies. It’s that it grabs our minds. And that is just plain wacky.
Surfing is, quite literally, the domain of Spicoli, Mick Fanning and Kanoa Igarashi.
Mick Fanning.
And I don’t need to go into intelligence quotients here.
So it doesn’t really matter if we surf twice a day or twice a year because we are the same sort of junkie and that’s the problem. Not that we’re spending our time trying to not bog rail but that we’re spending it thinking about thinking about not bogging rails.
Or Kanoa Igarashi’s speed floaters.
Either way, it’s time for me to go to bed.
Nighty-night.
See you at 3 am!
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Hot damn! Thanks for the shoutout. My wife is indeed brilliant.
True that
Seems like not too many stayed on point on this post……
Yep , I happily played the role of « the boyfriend you have to piss off daddy « from 85 to 2008 ….
just heard Carissa getting probed on CNN
GOOD JOB LEGEND!
I’m sure needs are still needs
I really didn’t know how to do it properly till I had a brasilian namorada
It’s not the surfing we addicted to Chas, its the idea of surfing. Why else would a crew of middle aged men gather around mobile screens to cast banter at each other across the globe. BeachGrit: home of the idea of surfing.
Except for the frizzy hair
Yes.
But I had more dirty twisted sex in my thirties/turn of century.
Pretty epic stuff, no Aussie chicks of course. You can’t beat the russians/brazzo chicks.
Something about the cold indifference of a hot ruski.
When they say I hate myself for wanting you.
Its music to a man’s ears.
I get swabbed all the time
I buy a new wallet every trip
Surfing provides you with a cross-over skill set. For instance , dropping your wallet.
Backdooring a gaping pit?
Float her to re-entry.
Budget cutbacks.
Being in the pocket is important. Why be dodgey? You can always escape out the doggy door. Just don’t claim that shit.
Absolutely jotto
Could be a wave of consequences.
Have you ever pulled a trolley dolly?
Hornier than nurses!
Surf your non-favourite ones?
Perhaps you will find something new in your surfing by doing so.
License to Thrill ……
On Monday I start a full time “career” job again after 14months surfing nearly every day. I’m genuinely panicking. Is there a program comparable to methodone to wean me off? Can BG be my support group?
write an article!
Funny because I’ve been thinking abut scribbling something down and submitting it about my experience infiltrating a small scene
What email to send it to?
And try and use quotes from some at least vaguely cool people.
Ha haaaaaa fat chance
Find a psyche doc that surfs. Schedule appointments for “doc talk” sessions* through company provided insurance. Appointments during work hours have to be reasonably accommodated. HIPPA laws will not allow employer to see psyche appointment reports. Face it, you’re an addict. You need help. It’s not your fault your psyche doctor prefers to schedule appointments for your particular ailment that involves surfing.
Good luck
*wink wink
Yeah heres some support
Harden up ya spoilt cunt
Smart too!
Such lanquage from such a pretty face! Wait–is that the real you?
What’s cookin sunset Sammy?
Sorry Return, you have a much better chance of quitting methadone than god damned m@therfucking surfing.
I once got stopped and searched in the 90s for exotic wood carvings coming back after 5 months and 30 days surfing in France ? I informed them , after showing them my Passport with the 6 month Visa for the French Republic , and my ticket with direct flight details , Bordeaux , Paris , Singapore , Sydney , that such items were more likely to be found on surfers coming back from Bali ( ? ) but they just thought I was being cheeky , grunted and groaned and continued searching through my dirty undies and board bag , they eventually let me through …. but in comparison to grilling before flying from Tel Aviv to Cairo in 91 , saved finally by genius sister ( ? ) who finally after 3 hours , remembered that she had proof that she really was a Doctor on her American Express Card ……. Next .
I got one: we were heading home from Sweden in the 90s. I had stuffed my bag full of kaviar, which comes in aluminum squeeze tubes. Got pulled into secondary in Chicago, and the dude was very confused about this potential contraband looking stuff, was about to confiscate, but I thought fast. “Relax bro, it’s just Swedish tooth paste!”, He looked at me confused but assuaged and waved me through. I love my Kalles!
https://uploads.disquscdn.c…
I’ve been telling the kids who I have surfed with for years to spend more money on their teeth than tattoos , because eventually white straight teeth are still going to get you laid once the novelty of the ink has faded away .
That is a righteous knowledge drop JB, I can just imagine them, looking at your pearly whites, then doing the mental calculus in their heads!
Too many tattoos just say
I’m a needy cunt.
Nice teeth say
If you’re lucky I’ll do you.
I’ve given up booze, weed, and tobacco.
Surfing… im-poss-eeeeble.
https://youtu.be/oSR8irQRdWs
Which ones the best.
Probly Gmed backdoor
Giving up booze, weed and baccy is proven to be bad for ya health
It’ll just be like any other weekend in Newquay. It’s the wild southwest down there. To be avoided at all costs….
I’m daft as a brush and I like surfingz!
Thanks Chas. I’m also frustratingly handsome.
I’m gonna have to borrow that line.
Wife: “You know Otto, sometimes you can be so frustrating.”
Me: “It’s not easy being this frustratingly handsome.”
It’s important to be handsome
You don’t have to overuse your personality
Wait, LT was a surf instructer? So, moving on, When you catch a good wave your body ‘releases endorphins’ which affect ‘your mind’. I think Tom Morey called it the ‘brain sparkle’. “Endorphins are among the brain chemicals known as neurotransmitters… Endorphins interact with the ‘opiate receptors- in the brain to reduce our perception of pain and ‘act similarly’ to drugs such as ‘morphine and codeine.” (Similar to morphine snd codine??) Believe this quote is further proof that surfing can be “addictive”–‘if your doing it right’….But if your not souled out–your not sold out–and you can probably take it or leave it, like LT ……..Ride free………
It can also help you rewire your brain chemistry if you are coming off of drugs