Horror news for VALS.
You don’t have to dive too deep into the morass of surf cliches to bump into the hoary ol “the best surfer out there is the one having the most fun” line.
Attributed to Phil Edwards, although he said nothing of the sort, which ain’t surprising, because a surfer like Philly-boy would’ve been deeply aware of the sport’s relentless mind-fucking; a sport that only reveals its secrets to the very young, rendering anyone joining the game after age twelve a life-long kook.
(There is, of course, nothing in this world that is sadder, or more hopelessly encouraged, than the late-in-the-game surfer.)
Now, an Australian academic, Robert Holt, has smashed the long-held, and deeply cherished, cliche in his PHD paper, Cape crusaders: an ethnography investigating the surfing subculture of Cape Naturaliste, Western Australia.
If you’re into the history of surfing in Western Australia, there isn’t a more comprehensive treatment, but it’s this excerpt that shines.
“The twin values my father imparted to me as a young footballer developing a feel for the game are correspondingly appropriate to surfing. ‘As long as you’re doing your best and having fun,’ he’d say. ‘That’s all that really matters.’ As a veteran surfer and as a cultural researcher I have observed many surfers in practice. The best surfers in the lineup are those who are having the most fun. These wave riders experience high doses of stoke. The most stoked surfers are those who catch waves and ride those waves to the best of their ability. These surfers experience hyper-fun. These surfers enjoy the surfing game, and surely, that is what really matters. This situation can be represented by the following simple equation.
Catching Waves + Wave Riding Performance = Surfing Fun.
Occam’s swishing blade in action, yes?
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Wonderful film …… ! I made my dad watch it and he got a few laughs from these dudes
Maintain the Rage !
The Big Banana , Pinapple , Prawn and Sheep have been done …. even the dog on the tucker box …. So I reckon a humongous bag of Cereal the size of a container might do the trick delivered by a dove …. representing peace …. fuck I sound like a contestant in Miss Universe
Published in 2012 … you sure keeping up with the times Drek … Obama vs. Romney anyone?
This proves that a good education doesn’t help you gain wisdom
This is ridiculous. Laird is the best.
Some excellent research there Mr Holt, well done. Loved reading of those special places and West Oz characters.
Nothing screams academia like using the word “stoke” in your research paper.
It was expertly juxtaposed with the “hyper-fun”. Most likely he’s tenured already.
Umm, saw nothing in the article that really disputes the statement in question..
Another Edwards quote, “the most fun you’ll ever have in surfing is the first time you catch a wave–then you start wondering who’s best –and it’s all downhill from there”.
The one who strains the hardest is the most constipated.
And will end up with piles ….. I had mine out a few years ago and I swear the specialist had 10 thumbs … I would run to the post operative Check ups and literally crawl home …. Why couldn’t my Dr Wife find a bloody female specialist with long svelte pianists fingers .?
The Beach Gritter is the one having the most fun, not having fun.
Seventy thousand words?
I’ll read it later
thanks for the link Derek. cape naturalist really is one of the great hard-core surf regions of the world (except for that it’s full of pussies and all the hard-cores mostly live in Margaret River)
The best any VAL can hope for is not drowning.
“In year 2014 an extensive study by researchers at the University College London tested a happiness theory on over 18,000 people. They concluded… that expectations are the key and that low expectations can make us happy and even moreso if they are exceeded later.” – https://dhammawiki.com/inde…
With the above kept in mind as best as I could, the primary aspiration of my last two sessions was effectively mapped-out as you describe. This may yet prove to be too much of a stretch.
Just give it your best cb. If you’re drowning, don’t go to the light, unless that’s where the surface is.
Blub blub blub
Bloody Hell Buddha could have told em that 3000 years ago
No shit. I’ve been doing/saying that for years.
If ya don’t get your hopes up, you’ll never be let down.
Remember that Lowered Expectations skit on MadTV? Stuart reminds me of 90% of the kids I meet nowadays.
https://www.youtube.com/wat…
Yeah but if you check the link out, they actually came up with a pretty amazing looking mathematical formula to, uh, formulate it.
Sheesh CB, now I have to do work?! I come here for dick jokes and half naked Coffeys.
Heh, I did check the link, many many Sigmas in their formula!
I do like the verbal presentation of Expectations:
1.For all life, that there exists, there is suffering.
2. Suffering exists because of unfulfilled expectations.
3. Therefore, it follows that, the logical negation of false expectations leads to no suffering.
Do They pay these guys to think about this rubbish?
No wonder Academics are the first to be shot by the communists
Nope. You pay for the privilege of writing and the doctorate is the little pot of gold at the end.
Jen see has gold?
That‘s Dr Jen too you ….. like in Indiana Jones
Your side would probably do it , but you don’t find too many Academics working at the fish shop with Pauline …. at least since the Nazi‘s bit the dust , biting of more they could chew in Stalingrad ? We did have one in Kiel . Nobel Winner and all , but disgraced as an active proponent of Nazi Ideology ,so he got no statue in the Nobel Prize winners Park next to Max Planck ….. Phillipp Lenard … you nazi cunt , fuck off !
https://youtu.be/kTs_Q4hEqmA
The best surfer is the one telling you to fuck off
No, the best surfer
Is the poor academic
Too busy to surf
oi oi! fuck off surfads!
Ripping
It’s really fun to go and sit in the car park at spots where there is a really long hike in on onshore days. When I see two twenty-something dumb cunts rock up in their shitty Subaru Outback (which happens every 7 minutes or so) I jump out of the car and pretend to be taking off me wettie. “Is it any good, Wiggs?”. “Yeah mate is fucken cooking get out there quick before the wind turns”. Once they have walked down to the look out and back in bare feet you usually have enough time to unhook their car battery and take a piss in the wiper fluid tank.
While he places delicately, your head between his fins , for 1000th time in a 1 hour session ….. this is how I worked out that a 13 year old Occy was probably the best surfer in the water .
While I do agree that the most fun is usually linked to ability and proximity to wave count.. I’ve seen plenty of crew dominate a lineup and act like someone just shat in their coffee. So, does being the best make for happy, or is it vice versa?
Being the best makes you feel rad, on the inside. If you aren’t the best all the time it feels good not to share those good vibes.
This is true PP.
I‘m usually happy in the water and try to manufacture my own fun. But then there’s the frustration, especially when there’s a goddam current, or its high tide and hard to get into one, or or or.. urghh
Totally. Then sometimes everything just clicks and you feel that rush. You look around and no one else seems to be hitting it the way you feel you are. One might be entitled in these scarce moments for everything committed over the years and all the times you’ve been lower in the pecking order.
For sure. With the time commitment not to mention whatever else has been sacrificed, some days it’s earned. As a pre 12 starter, but with a good chunk of time out mid 30’s, I just go out with a small wave count tally as my objective. Then slide the expectation bar up based how things progress.
I start with a wave every 5mins. If that fails I go for as many waves as appropriate with 3 that I know I surfed decently (to the best of my ability anyway) like completing a single cutback, a nice cutdown on a decent size wave, linking a couple of solid turns, a good floater or even a spray in the face of someone paddling back out – that is enough for me. Check @bigbadbobbain on insta his second last post he literally just trims this average beachie on his shortboard, no theatrics whatsoever, even his kick out after the wave finishes is chill as fuck. I want to try that when I can travel more than 5ks from my house again.
Sounds eerily similar to my mental gymnastics before and during a sesh. I’m always stoked to link a couple together and avoid feeling like a complete kook. Small victories! I hope you guys get outta jail soon, Bexy reckons Gladdy saved NSW but I think it was luck as much as anything else.
I think I follow Bainy but will suss the post. Cheers PP.
Gladys is funny. I heard her go from saying Queensland is mean and should open up our border to her fellow Welshers, and then go onto say (In the next sentence) that she shouldn’t open up her border to Victorian country folk who haven’t had any infections in the past month. Just like the whole of Queensland has had for the whole state.
Now she is saying that our Premier has “a political agenda”. Moving aside from the fact that by definition a premier is political. The agenda is a pretty good one. Keep us Queenslanders safe and healthy.
Being the best …. means staying the best ,like an aging Lion on the Savanna, keeping the younger males from his pride , a very stressful process ….. especially in your mid 40s . Also one could tell when a grommet , who use to be happy just to be in the water , had aspirations and was starting to rip , when they uttered there first fuck , in the line up when they fell off doing something they thought they should have made .
I tend to growl and grunt a lot in the water now. It works more like a slow burn. People don’t keep hanging around someone who growls.
Yowzers. I can see a truth in this – I started surfing at 10 and my bro started at 12. He got into cars and waaay more into drugs than me when he transitioned to adulthood and I just kept surfing and skating. I’m still kook tho. I’m gonna be kook as fuck when this Lockdown ends.
Where are you locked down? Melbourne? The rest of the world parties!
Yeh Melbourne. Do they? We hear nothing!
Take note
Vote accordingly
Gladys much like Dan should be held to account. Glad for ok’n the Ruby Princess debacle and Dan for hiring deadshit seccas to guard the hotels/fuck rona hostages and not say yes to help offered by the federal gov that all the other states did. Equally dumb, different parties.
If you can’t notice a difference in strategy you might wanna visit specsavers
n.b. Green
Too obsessed with the alphabet for me.
Sydney, at least, dances on your self-made grave!
This year has taken me down a few pegs from my usual “ha, fuck you, you all wish you were as cool as Melbourne!” attitude.
Sounds like the correct level to me
Whatever makes ’em feel good, I guess.