Slater-esque limelight steal.
The upcoming Tokyo Olympics was, let’s be honest, supposed to be the grand culmination of Kelly Slater’s vision. Six years ago his pool was unveiled in California’s Central Valley, “a wave so perfect most thought it was a prank,” Derek Rielly recently writing.
Six years ago and exactly six years since surfing was shortlisted on the list of potential new Olympic sports to be rolled out in Tokyo.
The script was not difficult to read. Japan has small waves in the summer, Slater would build one of his magic tanks there, 2021, would be the lofty apex of his dream. “Surfing” and “Kelly Slater’s version of surfing” would be one in the same. Millions of people watching the wave that sprung directly out of his mind. Millions of people imagining a KS taco every time they imagined surf.
In 2018 Kelly Slater Wave Co., then recently purchased by the World Surf League, announced it was building a tank outside Tokyo.
In 2018 Japan announced that surfing would be done in the ocean, not a tank.
There has been no word on KS Wave Co.’s Japan progress but major competitor, American Wave Machines, has just announced that its pool will be open ahead of the Olympics for practice, limelight stealing and whatnot.
– American Wave Machines, Inc. (AWM) announces that the final commissioning of PerfectSwell® Shizunami (静波サーフスタジアムPerfectSwell®) will commence at the end of the month. Located in the surf town of Shizunami, Makinohara, Japan, PerfectSwell® Shizunami will offer world-class competition surfing in a safe, controlled environment. The surf pool will also be available as a training platform for Olympic surfing teams.
Evan Geiselman, pro surfer and winner of the 2016 Ichinomiya Chiba Open, will be part of the commissioning team putting PerfectSwell® through the paces. New in Japan are software platform innovations like ‘Temporal Distortion’, a wave design parameter that will bring additional levels of control. “Temporal Distortion will lead to an entirely new selection of waves for both high-performance and learning applications,” said William McFarland, AWM Surf Programmer. “It will add shifting elements to the surf creating a more dynamic wave overall.” Other new features include upgrades to the system’s power response. “Start-up test results confirm that the enhanced performance response has been achieved,” said Lead Engineer Miquel Lazaro.
Etc.
Is this the final dagger for Slater’s ownership of the future?
Is it officially over?
Karmic revenge for using his pool to bury the Li’l Plumber Adriano de Souza’s happiness?
Sunway Lagoon still shits all over these joints.
Ummmmmmmmmmmm not.
https://www.youtube.com/wat…
It is too bad there isn’t such think as actual surf journalism. It would be fascinating to get to the bottom of wtf the WSL is doing with their wave pool game. So many false starts and promises and we are still complaining about the prototype that was never intended to be used as it is. How much money has been pissed away because of the pools? Probably more than on the tour itself? And for what purpose? So Dirk’s kids have a private wave they can be coached on by a minor surf celebrity? It would have been cheaper to buy Tavarua and hire Jonah Hill to coach them. Probably couldn’t afford Ben Marcus though.
Private company so good luck finding that out without a nice insider scoop. And I am pretty sure all those people in the know would be tied down from exposing any financials without a swift lawsuit coming their way.
Reporters in the real world deal with this effectively all the time. Definite threats but surfing isn’t special. If there’s a story, it can be revealed.
Ziff is worth like $5 billion.
If he wants to throw down $30 million on a private wave pool for him and his kids – with maybe some side benefit to the outside world – what difference does that make to you?
Mind your business.
You go out with your brothers and turn $1.4 billion into $14 billion and you can do whatever the hell you want.
Stop whining from the sidelines.
It’s the Ziff’s money.
They can do whatever they want with it and if you don’t like it, you can go piss up a rope.
Doesn’t sound like Black is complaining, this is, the ‘comment’ section after all, just voicing his opinion.
And true grasshopper, Ziff can do whatever he wants, it’s just a different world now, we now have the ‘haves’, and the ‘have nots’, where before, we all had equal rights to waves, no more.
It seems that time may have passed, and now if you want equal rights, you have to pay and pay or be a billionaire.
There was a time if a poor 3rd world kid saw a wave, he could paddle out and if he was in the right spot, take off, now those kids, if they see Dirk’s and Slater’s wave, have to stand outside of a locked fence, and listen to: ‘split gremmie’, “my beach”, “my” “waves”, go home, go home!!
https://getyarn.io/yarn-cli…
Doesn’t sound like Black is complaining, this is, the ‘comment’ section after all, just voicing his opinion.
And true grasshopper, Ziff can do whatever he wants, it’s just a different world now, we now have the ‘haves’, and the ‘have nots’, where before, we all had equal rights to waves, no more.
You still have equal rights to waves that don’t cost $30 million to build and are in the middle of the land of meth and methane. Just as you don’t have equal right to waltz into Disneyland and do whatever you want.
It seems that time may have passed, and now if you want equal rights, you have to pay and pay or be a billionaire.
No just for that one wave.
It’s an engineering challenge everyone else had failed at. Ziff and Slater and Co took on that challenge and beat it. Big time. You can’t appreciate the wave until you see it in person. You’re seeing this all from a distance, and filtered through the wiseasses at BeachGrit.com.
This is an accomplishment, like Tesla.
There was a time if a poor 3rd world kid saw a wave, he could paddle out and if he was in the right spot, take off,
He still can, anywhere in the world, just not in Lemoore.
now those kids, if they see Dirk’s and Slater’s wave, have to stand outside of a locked fence, and listen to: ‘split gremmie’, “my beach”, “my” “waves”, go home, go home!!
You need to smoke a different strain of whacky tabaccy. You ain’t making no sense no how.
It’s from the Surf Punks album, “My Beach”.
It seems we have the Ultimate form of localism now.
” My beach, my waves, my surf, go home!!, go home!!!
Now someone can really say it, mean it, and enforce it.
D____ D_____ was living in Pacific Studio that was built by S_____ M____ way back when.
He was tired of M______ so he lived up there in a nice recording studio out in the middle of nowhere.
It’s hot in W______, O______ in the summer so we would sit in an air conditioned studio and listen to M____ L____ and L____ N_____ (A____ F____)
He was a very very good ping pong player. I couldn’t touch him, and I actually beat K____ S_____ playing ping pong.
And then he committed suicide. Some people just don’t like getting old.
It seems the circumstances surrounding his death are ?
Still– tragic…
Suicide, apparently.
He was an odd bird, and odder with age.
I never said he can’t spend that money. I could give a shit what he spends his money on. However, buying a private pool is way different than buying a sports competitive outlet and then pitching non- stop bullshit and smoke and mirrors. If he owned a pool in the middle fo the desert that he imported coaches to for his kids, I say go for it, But if you’re going to tell me how you’re going to develop this idea and build one here and another there, I’m interested to know why that didn’t happen.
And, you’re not the only one here who shops at the grocery store with people with more money than they could ever spend. I’m sure there are plenty of people here who are privy to how that world works. Malibu is not special.
I never said he can’t spend that money. I could give a shit what he spends his money on.
Well you do seem to give a shit what he spends his money on.
However, buying a private pool is way different than buying a sports competitive outlet and then pitching non- stop bullshit and smoke and mirrors.
Did that sentence not make sense to anyone else?
Please detail the non-stop bullshit and smoke and mirrors?
Surf Ranch is an experiment, that’s all. A perfect wave in the Central Valley.
Do people care about it?
Will they watch the contest?
Will they pay money to ride the damned thing out there in the land of Meth and Methane?
Apparently so. Experiment is working.
And now they are going to improve that wave and build them elsewhere.
LA Quinta is next?
If he owned a pool in the middle fo the desert that he imported coaches to for his kids, I say go for it, But if you’re going to tell me how you’re going to develop this idea and build one here and another there, I’m interested to know why that didn’t happen.
It’s extremely expensive and complicated and Covid has balloxed up everything but they are proceeding with other waves.
And, you’re not the only one here who shops at the grocery store with people with more money than they could ever spend. I’m sure there are plenty of people here who are privy to how that world works. Malibu is not special.
Malibu is special, actually.
By far the nicest, least-screwed up small town in coastal So Cal.
They’ve done a good job of not wrecking this place.
All of California used to be like this.
Malibu is a remnant, holding on by its fingertips.
It’s special enough that a beach shack costs $15,000,,, – $150,000,0000
So should we close Disneyland and the Santa Cruz Boardwalk and Belmont Park and all the other places that charge admission for people to have fun.
That’s all Surf Ranch is and is going to be.
It’s just another roadside attraction.
Don’t know why you’re so bet about it.
Doesn’t effect you, does it?
They invested $30 million and a shitload of brain and sweat equity into a risky deal, and it worked – like Tesla.
The thing is an engineering marvel. A very expensive one.
This tech makes Kelly’s wave look so steam punk – dragging the front of tanker up & down a pool, fuck even Kelly can think that one up!
Spoiler alert Eric “Elo” Logan and Elo N Musk team up and plan a grand surf championship finale contest in a electric wave pool on the moon.
Have they not added radiation for extra authenticity?
pretty obvious Adriano must own some of the AWM stock……revenge is sweet,LOL.
the real story about the K-Tub in Japan…….was presented to investors , to build the pool with a Hotel/cafe blah blah blah…….I actually met with an investor who had $450m to spend……..spent an hour showing the wave counts per hour….and how many surfers in Japan could surf Kelly’s wave …..walked out after an hour the project was dead in the water.
Will see you soon
In fairness, the 2020 Olympic s are a year and a half late due to a worldwide pandemic.
Cut Kelly some slack.
As far as water usage, the Central Valley has loads of hidden water ski spots.
Attached photo is about ten minutes East of Lemoore. I included GPS coordinates for doubters.
https://uploads.disquscdn.c…
I hope Devin Nunes aka The Portuguese Hillbilly and his billion dollar ag corporation buddies dont see all this water being wasted for something so frivolous. The poor ag corporations need their virtually free water or they won’t survive…just ask them. “Farmers feed America!” “Food grows where water flows!” “Build more dams!” “Make America Great Again!”
Couple of fun ones
Did the WSL ever release how much they paid for Kelly’s pool ? It’s probably their best performing asset.
200 x corporate days @ $50k +
$10 mil per year revenue. I’d say the profit margin is pretty high.
Add in the tv show, celebrity days etc, the WSL have done a pretty good job in making the pool a money making machine
The CT event is basically just so they can show corporations that surfers still think Kelly’s pool is the best.
They did release it, but I can’t remember the number. Around 20 mil.
I think?
A drop in the bucket for Ziff.
Numbers from the inside? Inside of what?
And I kinda prefer the Pacific ocean at this time.
And there is only one true God, (the creator of heaven and earth), and when you start believing there are many gods, you start to open yourself up to dangerous ground, be careful.
You’re stoked, that I’m stoked?
Cool.
You have connections at the top?
$5,000,000,000 at 4% = $200,000,000 and $200,000,000 at 4% = $8,000,000 so he didn’t pay for the whole deal with the interest on his interest but only just his interest.
Rumor has it the total bill was $30,000,000.
I doubt if anybody’s using it outside of the summer months.
And once you find how much time it takes to really get even halfway good at surfing, a lot of people may have given up on it.
Guy I know went there in early December. Water temps in the low 50s, so prices were a little lower (maybe?).
I’m sure there’s the random few, but I doubt it’s really getting much use in winter.
And who knows if there’s really many dropping 50 Grand in the summer just so they can get embarrassed in front of their kids.
For 50 Grand you can take your family on a pretty nice vacation for a couple weeks, and make the wife happy too.
250+ days a year, sideline-sitter, at $50,000 – $70,000 a day.
A way better business model than being open to the public.
When I lived in colder climates, even I, used to have trouble putting on my wetsuit sometimes to paddle out in some winter conditions.
I really doubt he’s doing much business in the winter.
250+ days a year.
Where do you get your numbers from?
And even if, it is of no import to me I think.
While surfing, I seem to have developed somewhat of a love relationship with the real Ocean, and don’t think I could relate or survive in a tank.
I’m stoked to have the real thing.
Where do you get your numbers from?
The top. The inside. The inside of the top.
And even if, it is of no import to me I think.
Okay.
While surfing, I seem to have developed somewhat of a love relationship with the real Ocean,
Which one? There are many oceans, just as there are many Gods. Which is your’n?
and don’t think I could relate or survive in a tank.
So don’t.
I’m stoked to have the real thing.
“We’re stoked that you’re stoked. I shall communicate to my connections at the top and the inside that a reader of bitchgripe.com is stoked.
Ok
Numbers from the inside? Inside of what?
And I kinda prefer the Pacific ocean at this time.
And there is only one true God, (the creator of heaven and earth), and when you start believing there are many gods, you start to open yourself up to dangerous ground, be careful.
You’re stoked, that I’m stoked?
Cool.
You have connections at the top?
Numbers from the inside? Inside of what?
The people who own and run that show.
And I kinda prefer the Pacific ocean at this time.
So does everyone else, but a perfect wave breaking in the land of Meth and Methane is an interesting sideshow, innit?
And there is only one true God, (the creator of heaven and earth), and when you start believing there are many gods, you start to open yourself up to dangerous ground, be careful.
Which God? Buddha? Yah__eh? Confucious? Allah? Jah? I like Odin and Freya. The Viking Gods. The Led Zeppelin Gods.
You’re stoked, that I’m stoked?
Way.
Cool.
You have connections at the top?
Oui.
The biggest win for the WSL is that environmentalists in California aren’t completely roasting them for the tank’s water usage. Have a feeling that could change with this upcoming mega-drought though, but we’ll see.
Would love to know how much water is in the tub at any given point, how much evaporates on a daily basis and how much money the water costs them overall.
the pee refills it each day
They pour Michelob Pure Gold in there?
It is estimated to be 15m gallons with up to 250,000 evaporating on an extremely hot day.
And La’manure gets hot AF in the summer
sooooooo… the pool would be empty in 6 days if not filled back up? Something does not sound right. Maybe some anit-pool, enviro math in there somewhere? Can you reference the source. Honestly curious.
Did a little googling too and saw those numbers via Wired Magazine… Not sure about them either and I’m honestly curious about the water use too.
Sorry fat fingers – 15 not 1.5
https://www.surfer.com/feat…
So it’s safe to say that almost 3/4 of a million gallons gonna evaporate over the three days of the comp this weekend, cause it’s gonna be hot as balls.
there’s almost endless stretches of onshore slop around the world that I would rather splash around in than a nasty urinal wave.
I still think Kelly won. He created a perfect wave. He sold it for big bucks. The world didn’t love it but I’m not sure that was his intention. The WSL submarined the execution beyond that point. Still no Austin (remember they bought an existing wave???), no Tokyo. Nowhere else. This is a WSL failure.
I believe the fallout and true ramifications of this artificial wave and others, will not be known for some years.
And obviously, you cannot judge the merits or success of something by $$.
There were millions of stoked Groms before artificial waves, who dreamed of nothing but going and hitting the surf the next day, now they fall asleep with visions of tanks in their head. And the contentment and love they once had for the ocean and her joys may be fading, while chasing after a mirage of false hopes.
Crushing someone’s joy and hope with false hopes behind a locked fence, is not winning.
Have you surfed a wave pool? It doesn’t hold a fucken candle to the real thing. I doubt that there will be many groms who would rather a pool sesh. It’s the domain of the VAL.
(edit. That sounded a bit hostile towards you. Not my intention)
I went down to Melb for a few days a couple of weeks a go. Had 5 sessions. The water was 11 degrees. I live in SE Qld (24 here when I left) and found it incredibly cold. But that place was packed from 6am till 9pm Not a spare spot in any session. It was incredible. Cold and miserable Melb – but I did not talk to one person who did not really enjoy the experience. I was blown away by the number of people learning to surf in the beginner sessions. It was rammed and they were all having a ball. It almost made me cry thinking of what the future my hold. That place is a cash cow of the highest order. I recond its net payback period would be approx. 3 years without the pandemic. A nice little investment for all those involved. I am really surprised no one has built one up this way yet. They would kill it. Does it compare to the real thing – no – but you catch 12-15 waves every hour depending on the setting . And it was fun. If I lived in Melb I would probably go once a week.
I had a bloke tell me when I was there once that it was better than indo. I could kind of understand that coming from a kook, but this guy could surf. I was flummoxed.
It’s definitely not that. Not by a long way – but still a fun trip for a couple of days. Nice food, nice beers, good accom across the road. Very accessible. Not cheap though !
There are enough surfers around that would pay up to get a guarantee of waves. More like a skate park than the ocean, but I am in. Need to get the one built in Palm Springs, California and I can see a similar result as what you experienced.
Great, now the desert is ruined too.
Well, time will tell. This is still totally in its infancy, probably take at least a couple of years to see where its all leading to..
I can’t really see walking through a gate, paying someone, then a fence around me keeping kids with no money out.
Just kinda sounds like somewhat of a soulless experience.
Do they sell cotton candy there too.
Time will tell.
I agree. Until proven otherwise, this will remain a novelty exercised by sham developers. I have kids and their dreams were not stolen. They’ll surf whatever is in front of them and have an opinion about it after, just like I do. The only dream Kelly stole was Adriano’s but that was premeditated and what makes him so spectacular.
No offense taken.
And no, I haven’t been in a tank and don’t plan to, but the Groms, until you’ve logged some real surf time, a decade or two or more, I think are more susceptible to these advertising schemes.
Let’s hope they see through it.
To add to their other fails. Someone should compile the Wozzie’s shitlist – even just since E-Lo took over. It’d be a read as long as war and peace!
So they went across the Ocean to find somebody to “put it thru its paces”, and all they could find was some unknown shapers kid? Why not just grab some little boy who has never done anything in their life…..oh wait
Waco > Surf Ranch
The Ocean>Waco+Surf Ranch
I still can’t believe people fly from exotic places to Waco Texas.