Surf darling, pop sensation Shakira attacked by wild boars in Spain, bravely faces son at moment of truth: “They’ve destroyed everything. Milan, tell the truth. Say how your mummy stood up to the wild boar.”

Kill 'em all.

I don’t know if any VAL (Vulnerable Adult Learner) story is as heartwarming as pop sensation Shakira’s. Just one month ago she took to Instagram, from the Basque Country Wavegarden, to order her VAL peers to teach their children to surf.

A theoretical decimation of an invasive species but, speaking of, our surf darling was just attacked by two wild boars whilst hiking with her son, Milan, in a park near Barcelona.

According to the BBC:

She shared her bizarre tale in a series of Instagram stories on Wednesday.

Holding the now recovered but torn bag towards the camera, she said: “Look at how two wild boar which attacked me in the park have left my bag.”

“They were taking my bag to the woods with my mobile phone in it,” the singer continued. “They’ve destroyed everything.”

She then turned to her son, whose father is the Barcelona footballer Gerard Piqué, and said: “Milan tell the truth. Say how your mummy stood up to the wild boar.”

Apparently nasty wild boar are reaching epic proportions in Catalonia. Too many rooting etc.

I, myself, experienced the pestilence on Oahu and hunted one to death.

Read here.

But now to VALS.

What to do?

How to sort?

When will bags go missing etc.?

More as the story develops.

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Lemon Next to the Pie
Lemon Next to the Pie
4 years ago

Those pigs do not lie.

Italo Post Heat Interview
Italo Post Heat Interview
4 years ago

What does this have to do with surfing again?

Travis Edgar
Travis Edgar
4 years ago

Charles ” Snooty ” Smith

Phat-wan kerr
Phat-wan kerr
4 years ago

not the first hog she has stared down

Beef & Beer
Beef & Beer
4 years ago

I’ve just shot, https://uploads.disquscdn.c… killed, and beheaded the boar that chased world class surfer/goddess Shakira and her son.
Hopefully she’ll pay up soon, or is that ‘put out’, I mean…

astro
astro
4 years ago
Reply to  Beef & Beer

Mean as, cuz.
Sorta makes Chas’s one look like a piglet …

Beef & Beer
Beef & Beer
4 years ago
Reply to  astro

Bloody oath
Presumably Chas’s one is on Oahu though, a place not exactly known for any decent sized animals…(apart from some locals hehe)

astro
astro
4 years ago
Reply to  Beef & Beer

Hah, yea. I thought they might have tossed the piglet and thrown da long pig in da umu. Him skinny, fuckall meat so got away with it.

Travis Edgar
Travis Edgar
4 years ago
Reply to  Beef & Beer

Beef, Boar & Beer!

Beef & Beer
Beef & Beer
4 years ago
Reply to  Travis Edgar

Man, beer, pig
Or is that
Manbearpig…(Southpark style)

Travis Edgar
Travis Edgar
4 years ago
Reply to  Beef & Beer

Porkmebeefcurtains man!…said the Bush pig

Boat Docks
Boat Docks
4 years ago

A Catalonian boar once tried to test me. I ate his liver with some fava beans and a nice Chianti.

Ricky Spanish
Ricky Spanish
4 years ago

She sure it wasn’t the Coffey sisters?

Picard Madeoff
Picard Madeoff
4 years ago
Reply to  Ricky Spanish

Check onlyfans for details

Dogsnuts
Dogsnuts
4 years ago

Fucking Milan….. more pretentious than Paris if that’s possible. Someone call their kid Geelong and see if it turns out to be a modern day Ghengis Kahn.

Lemon Next to the Pie
Lemon Next to the Pie
4 years ago
Reply to  Dogsnuts

You know what happens when you name a kid Byron?

Turns out to be VAL-loving, anti-vaxxing, hipster juggling hacky sacks for a living.

Dogsnuts
Dogsnuts
4 years ago

And if you call your kid Darwin?

Lemon Next to the Pie
Lemon Next to the Pie
4 years ago
Reply to  Dogsnuts

You get an award.

Stick man
Stick man
4 years ago

Boar Grit

Otto
Otto
4 years ago

Out hiking? So what?!
In Italy, these darling boars will tear your nutsack off cause you smell like pasta, and happen to be walking in Rome.

https://www.thelocal.it/202…

GiGi
GiGi
4 years ago
Reply to  Otto

The mountain Itals will stay up all night to burry a buckshot in their tenderloin cause they eat all their figs at 1 AM….. the stew these wild swines make paired with a nice montepoleciano is sublime ….

ValiantScorn
ValiantScorn
4 years ago

Better luck next time, boars!

Cannabis-Creativity
Cannabis-Creativity
4 years ago

“Say how your mummy stood up to the wild boar.”

“Say how your mummy stood up in the wild white water at the shopping mall wave park.”

Wiggolly's Paddling Style
Wiggolly's Paddling Style
4 years ago

Beautiful photograph of you and your wife in Oahu, Chas. Hope you had a wonderful time it’s a beautiful place sometimes.

Otto
Otto
4 years ago

It’s more interesting to read about the times it ain’t.

StarJamma
StarJamma
4 years ago

Those boars don’t lie.

Travis Edgar
Travis Edgar
4 years ago

Chas ” Hunter ” Smith


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