Advertisement
Kelly Slater (left) takes another scalp. Photo: Instagram
Kelly Slater (left) takes another scalp. Photo: Instagram

Artist defaces historically significant surfboard to make Kelly Slater shrine!

Famous designer buried by GOAT.

If we are honest with ourselves, Kelly Slater is surf history. The world’s greatest ever surfer has been at the top of his game as long as many of us have been alive. His eleven world titles. His Eddies and Pipe Masters. His most special and exclusive wildcards. Slater is, of course, a singular force but there was a era that he was not. Back in the before-times.

Now, surfers were mostly pre-literate then leaving social scientists to collect bits of chatter from grumpy locals in order to get a sense of the way things were. Some speak of grifters who lived in the shadow of Malibu. Others of a surfboard shaper-cum-designer named Shaw Stüssy.

According to legend, Stüssy got into the fashion game in 1980. He sold hats and t-shirts from the trunk of his car. His scrawl was instantly recognizable.

Very cool.

It became art though one piece, which has survived, has just been defaced to make a shrine to the aforementioned G.O.A.T.

Artist Victoria White has a very distinctive style and often uses surfboards as her canvas. Most recently she created a shrine to the current world number twenty-three.

Kelly Slater Is Basically Divine

Taking to Instagram, White declared:

“MOTIVATION IS TEMPORARY. INSPIRATION IS PERMANENT.” — KELLY SLATER

I PAINT WHO I LOVE. i do not choose the subjects of my portraits on a whim. before i ever pick up a brush to paint a portrait, i have to get to know the subject, try to understand them, and decide whether i love them, whether i feel inspired by them.

for my first portrait on surfboards, i watched a few surfing documentaries, read a few books, and then finally ended up reading @kellyslater ‘s autobiography, Pipe Dreams. I was so inspired by Kelly’s undeniable and unwavering commitment to his goals, his ability to transform his fears into fuel, and the discipline and devotion that have made him the G.O.A.T. of surfing. there was no question in my mind that I LOVED EVERYTHING KELLY SLATER STOOD FOR, and i had to paint him.

i have unending gratitude for you, @kellyslater, because of the inspiring way in which you have lived your life and for recognizing my work; for the @usopenofsurf and the @wsl , for helping me share my creativity and inspiration; and for my amazing community for supporting my authentic and vulnerable creative process.

Very powerful but let us look at the boards before they were made holy.

Do you notice the penmanship on the middle board there?

The one that became Slater’s nose and earlobes?

Undeniably Stüssy.

I guess better for all, though, that all surf history simply becomes Kelly Slater.

To the turtle moon.

0 0 votes
Article Rating

Commented on Disqus? Log out, tap the Disqus button, and your old name and comments come back. The box is ours.

Join the discussion

Your comments are still here. Every one of them.

Twelve years of BeachGrit comments came across from Disqus. Connect and we will show you how many are yours. We get your username, nothing else.

Unclaimed
Handle
Comments
Posting since

Connect Disqus to reveal.

Subscribe
Notify of
44 Comments
Newest
Oldest Most Voted
MrC

Looks to me like she simply painted a Slater version of the ugly pin up behind the guitar/Uke on the wall to the left.,…… 🤔

channelbottom

Victoria, as an art school graduate I feel I’m in a pretty good place to say that your ‘art’ is trite, shite, and waste of acrylic paint, never mind the poor surfboards. At least some collector can probably scrape off all that crap and still have an old board.

Go read some art theory books.

Rafael McMaster

As an art school graduate, are you a successful artist? Cause she is. And she’s one of the kindest and most sincere people I know. She didn’t ask for anyone to write about her, she just wants to paint for a living. Honest human being, that if you ever had a conversation w her, you’d be like “wait, why am I being an asshole to this person”…

JoJo the Dog Faced Boy

Another Chas article, another typo: ‘If we are honest with ourselves, Kelly Slater is history.’

channelbottom

This is like those people who take perfectly good old woodworking tools and cut them up, maim them in the name of ‘decoration.’

RQ.

hypercringe.

tim_nelsen

“eccentric, naive & (b)anal…”

Gil Gunderson

Hope she got good marks for that year 12 art project.

Stick man

or Rich Marx!

Gil Gunderson

Or Karl Marx!

tim_nelsen

i will meditate on this: Is Kelly a surf nazi? ooohhhmmmmm…

Abscessed Llama

Pretty sure she projected his image up on those boards and painted by numbers..

Picard Madeoff

The old saying “corn today, corn tomorrow” applies as human digestive systems were poorly designed when it comes to whole kernel corn consumption. Some might suggest that is why humans began making whiskey out of corn but I hate whiskey and really don’t care. So I’ll keep drinking tequila with my corn tortillas…

Rocks local

Bourbon has a wheat base (as opposed to corn) … I realize that has nothing to do with your overall point, just thought I would mention it. Cheers to all.

Picard Madeoff

Ok I used Chat GPT for the following since the only hard liquor I drink is drink Tequila and don’t know the difference between Whiskey and Bourbon:
Bourbon is a specific type of whiskey that’s made from at least 51% corn and aged in new charred oak barrels. According to Taste of Home, the difference between bourbon vs. whiskey is that bourbon is a specific type of whiskey—American, to be exact. But the difference between bourbon vs. whiskey is a little more complicated than that. Whiskey is a spirit distilled from grains—some combination of wheat, corn, barley and/or rye—and aged in barrels. Whiskey is made around the world, and you’ve probably tasted (or heard of) famous varietals, like Scotch whisky or Irish whiskey1. The main differences between bourbon and whiskey are the kind of grain used and where the spirit is produced. Bourbon is an American made whiskey that must contain at least 51 percent corn in its mash and be aged in new, charred-oak barrels2. Whiskey can be made from any grain and aged in any type of wood barrel3. So, all bourbon is whiskey, but not all whiskey is bourbon. I hope this helps! Let me know if you have any other questions.

Rocks local

Ha, ironically hoisted by my own bourbon addled mind. It is a fact that the finer KY bourbons have wheat as the dominant secondary grain, but corn is always the primary, as you said. I’ll lay off the sipping and commenting … maybe.

Picard Madeoff

Or maybe sip more…

tim_nelsen

on tonight’s menu: tequila and taco burgers. (tentative: ’cause a hot iron skillet and drinking is not a (young/old) man’s game and neither is home-made sushi (i.e., the grandpa roll)…

Picard Madeoff

It is a halibut night here with no alcohol…

tim_nelsen

ceviche, cubana fish sammy. and a later smoke~

Picard Madeoff

Smoking is bad for your health

JohnsKnees

So many questions and so few answers.

Who is this lady?

She is selling a Duke version of this same piece for $20,000, to who? why?

This peice is mark sold? Who the hell is droping perssumibly over $20,000 for this.

The best part might be the qoute on the back of the boards.

https://images.squarespace-…

Rich Marx

I’m glad I’m not the only one who found just this entire situation hilarious – this lady, her ability to play off Slater’s narcissism to generate publicity, her own narcissism that comes out when she mentions how thankful she is to Slater paying attention to her, and it just keeps on going.

I too question who this art is for. Probably intended for Slater. But I don’t know if Slater buying the art is funnier than Slater not buying the art. I think Slater not buying the art is funnier because you know deep down how much he loves this.

Mentioning Slater’s 2004 autobiography is icing on the cake. It’s terrible.

I googled her name. Apparently she was a lawyer who can’t work because of a “black mold” infection which sounds completely fake to me.

c4

Bunch of L.A garbage.

Rich Marx

I don’t think this is much better

https://www.youtube.com/sho…

tim_nelsen

RM: The Archivist!

Rafael McMaster

I actually know Victoria. She is legit and sincere and one of the kindest humans I’ve ever met. She didn’t paint this with the hope to get famous or meet him or anything like that. She paints people she is inspired by, from RBG to Marley. And yeah, that black mold thing is real. Pretty insensitive on your behalf to be trolling people you don’t know for medical conditions they DO have. She didn’t ask for this piece to be written about her, she inspired someone the same way she was inspired by Kelly. But haters are gonna hate.

Rich Marx

The quitting law thing was more about the places she worked, how long she worked there, and how high up she made it. I would have burned out within 2 years in that path. I just think that is a much more likely explanation than black mold.

If anyone is a loser here it’s me. Modern life is war for peoples attention and in the end she got mine.

AI (for ever) .

I think people are buying it because it’s authentic. Like she’s watch a couple of surf clips and even read a book about surfing.

channelbottom

Did she ACTUALLY bust out the fins for this shit?!?!?

faaaaaaakin hell.

Mapski

Does “Kooks Go Home” written with wax count?

NEGATRON

I judge people in a very negative manner who have Surfboard art in their homes.

Barrelled

They sit right above people who are obsessed with Zuckerberg in my world.

JohnsKnees

What if its a Miki Dora/Jesus collab?
https://images.squarespace-…

Anyone else think Jonah Hill would have been the better option here?

tim_nelsen

30 minutes later, i see it! jesus h. dora

frank

If Dora was alive he’d sue her

K55

If we are to be honest with ourselves (myself), Kelly Slater through the years, has just been mostly an annoyance, to be ignored, and maybe good for a few laughs.

K55

PS
She defiled those boards.

Sean Connery

Nobody laughs harder than Kelly… to his own jokes.

Barrelled

Pretty sure the guys name is Shawn, not Shaw.

Chas Smith

Potato, potatoe.

Occ Topus

Chas, Chase, Chastity.

Barrelled

Riding illiteracy to the grave.

Skippy

And the bottom board is obviously Curren’s famous no logo board from that Haleiwa contest, blasphemy!


44
0
Would love your thoughts, please comment.x
()
x