"Brad Gerlach looking fire!"
Johnny Depp is an American treasure, having starred in more iconic movies than John Waters can shake a moustache at. The now 61-year-old entered the consciousness, as t were, with a 1984 turn in the classic franchise A Nightmare on Elm Street but really became famous as a teen-appearing cop on 21 Jump Street.
From there it was the moon, or, rather, stars. Cry-Baby, Ed Scissorhands, What’s Eating Gil Grape, Benny and Joon etc. etc. and etc. culminating in the bigger-than-anything Pirates of the Caribbean series.
Life was good. Great, even, until… Amber Heard.
The trial ‘tween Depp and his ex-wife became a sordid bit of ugly, much behind-the-scenes business shared that tainted the cinema hero’s reputation including… well, I guess limited to his bad teeth.
Photos of Capt. Jack Sparrow’s chompers went viral during the courtroom proceedings with followers aghast at their rotten-looking appearance. The peanut gallery immediately throwing peanuts. “Why do i have to see closeup pics of johnny depp’s teeth against my will,” one X-user asked, while a second declared, “Johnny Depp just looks like someone grabbed his teeth and painted them black.”
A third, going for the jugular, simply stated, “Seeing that pic of Johnny Depp’s teeth on my tl just ruined my mood.”
Well, it appears that Depp listened, pondered then went and got a fresh pair of tusks, clearly asking the dentist to give him the “full Brad Gerlach.
New photos just emerged of Donnie Brasco at an airport in the Bahamas by surf fans mistaking him for the Wave Ki master. Gerlach, of course, beloved by the aforementioned surf fans for generations.
“Am I right too [sic] see that his teeth are looking brighter than ever before???” one Instagram commenter triple asked. Another added, “Is it [me] or does [sic] his teeth look more straight?”
A third, right to the point, “Brad Gerlach looking fire!”
What a day.
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If Ethan does one of those simple off the lip 360’s in a heat the judges are going to cream themselves. .
so wait…Einhorn is Finkle and Depp is Gerlach. It all makes sense now.
laces out
Dan.
Love a slopey shoulder ?
Love Lowers.
His movies suck, the mob one was ok.
https://uploads.disquscdn.c…
Ever notice how Depp stole the look and mannerisms of Adam Ant?
“An American treasure”? You say?
Really?
Aren’t those the same teeth he wore in Willy Wonka?
Johnny was wearing fake “summer teeth” (summer here, summer there) in the trial to make him look more beat down by Amber and appear more sympathetic/pathetic to the jury.
It’s all about the makeup, lads.
wow! looks like the WSL Finals is gonna be a cracker of a Championship Title event.
HISTORIC!!!
Load the Musket
I’m contemplating an overseas trip to get some dental work..
Research into backwards caps suggests they were firstly worn that way in the U.S. of A. by baseball catchers to get a better view of the incoming ball.
Whereas European cyclists wore their (smaller, lighter) caps with the peak to the front and flipped up from the wind.
Surfers, pirates, actors and/or surfing pirate actors, have no reason to wear caps at all if they’re not in direct sunlight, though if they did it should always be with the peak forward and in a downward position as intended by the original designers and manufacturers.
P.S.
No one should wear a cap, neither forward nor backward, inside any building.
Both Depp and Gerlach are obviously lacking in correct cap usage and are a disgrace to proper headwear deportment…
How do you feel about wearing a hat while surfing?
This is becoming an epic surf adjacency flat spell
When will it ever end? 😴
Don’t forget Nathan Fletcher also a member of the creepy veneers club
Why is it creepy to have veneers?
It could be the tan to luminescence ratio, but idk. Of course It’s good to have nice white teeth, and veneers are great, but if a persons teeth start looking like 100watt lightbulbs then it can get a little kabuki imo
they would blacken their teeth for old timey Japanese Kabuki theater though
Yup. Heres the inverse of that https://uploads.disquscdn.c…
He can’t afford them.
“random unwarranted insult towards a badass Eddie Aikau invitee who has done nothing but make the sport look more respectable”
I’m starting to realize a lot of you fools are just scared of/allergic to men who behave like men and don’t necessarily love to hear themselves make pathetic attempts at jokes.
Don’t forget Nathan Fletcher has been invited to more than one Eddie Aikau Invitational. Who gives a fuck about his teeth and why are y’all so obsessed with other men’s physical appearance.
How many times has the Aikau family invited YOU?
How white are YOUR natural beautiful teeth?
Ever lived with deep hardcore pain in your tooth? He ain’t a fuckin narcissist worried about his Victoria’s Secret contract going into jeopardy because of a visible tooth problem, he probably just had a bunch of pain and decided to put some sponsorship money towards a lifetime of pain-free teeth that also happen to look so good that they make beachgritty sandy vaginers jealous 🖕
So when you suck off Nate do you swallow or spit it out? I’m going with the former
I was going to ask if the veneers have adversely affected the self fellating
Yeah nobody is ever gonna remember your fuckin name or how many times you commented on this shitrag white supremacist echo chamber, but his Eddie highlights will always exist.
yall need therapy with all the fuckin homoerotic thoughts that instantly enter your mind when someone tells you like a man that you’re a little bitch
Are you fools ever going to notice how EVERY single response of yours is about some homosexual act?
Respecting people who deserve respect is sooooo gheeeeeyyyyyyy!
Are ther any beachgrit donkeys who AREN’T immature white baby boomer wannabe bullies with weird homoerotic thoughts?
Still waiting to hear how many times you’ve been invited to the Eddie Aikau Invitational.
Let me guess…
“hehehehehehe you and Eddie sitting it a tree, K I S S I N G hehehehehehehe please upvote me fellow baby boomers!!!! My homophobia is so funny and not at all revealing! Hehehheehehhehe”
AND THE STORY BROKE HERE INSTEAD OF REUTERS OR ASSOCIATED PRESS!!!
🤙💪🤑💵💰