Only a surfer knows the feeling.
Only a surfer knows the feeling.

Biggest surf brand in the world acquires company that made “the original hoodie” for staggering $1.2 billion

"It's a brave new surf industry."

Sport season is in full flare, in North America, with professional baseball, college football, professional women’s basketball and professional football fans losing minds daily. Baseball is in its playoffs, as is the WNBA. College and pro football are still early in the season but late enough for major upsets and big-time coach firings to have roiled. Sports fans going absolutely bonkers.

Surf fans left bereft.

While its easy enough, and sometimes enjoyable, to follow along with the World Surf League’s Championship Tour, it is genuinely difficult to be passionate about it. John Florence, Ethan Ewing, Gabe Medina and Caitlin Simmers are all fine to watch but nobody, other than their family members, care if they win or lose a heat. Cheering professional surfing is like cheering bird watchers though maybe slightly lower stakes.

Until now.

For, hours ago the world’s largest surf brand acquired a historical sporting giant for an eye-watering $1.2 billion and might the move inject some much-needed rah, rah, sis, boom, bah into our passive sport of kings?

Yes, Authentic Brands Group, owner of Quiksilver, Billabong, Roxy, RVCA, Von Zipper and maybe more has come to agreement with with Hanes underwear to acquire Champion. The company, which began its life in 1919 as the “Knickerbocker Knitting Company” made uniforms for teams such as the mighty Michigan Wolverines. It changed its name to “Champion Knitting Mills” in 1930 and proceeded to invent the hooded sweatshirt. It was sold to cake company Sara Lee in 1989 then later the aforementioned underwear giant before turning surf.

Jamie Salter, Authentic Brands CEO declared, “We are excited to acquire Champion, a brand that shares our pioneering spirit. Over the last few years, the addition of new brands together with the expansion of live events has grown Authentic into a world leading sports and entertainment licensing company. Bringing Champion into the fold further expands our position in this space.”

Only a surfer knows the feeling.
Only a surfer knows the feeling.

Extremely cool and maybe finally surf fans will be able to purchase jerseys they can be proud of instead of this.

As synergy would have it, David Lee Scales (no relation to Sara Lee) discussed fandom on the just-dropped episode of Noble Rot. I enjoy my baseballs and footballs etc. David Lee does not but I encouraged him to embrace a new sort of fandom. Being wildly overenthusiastic about products.

I, for instance, am a massive, major, no. 1 supporter of Hostess fruit pies. Cherry and lemon are my favorite and I would dress in Hostess fruit pie t-shirts and caps everyday, if they made them. I am also a huge backer of french onion dip and, not so secretly anymore, Outerknown. Which goods, beverages or foodstuffs do you loudly and proudly back?

You can listen to the episode here while you are thinking.

Load Comments

Erin Brooks (pictured) when things were rosy. Photo: WSL
Erin Brooks (pictured) when things were rosy. Photo: WSL

Canadian surf sensation Erin Brooks in real danger of missing cut for ’25 championship tour

What a strange brew.

There was a time, but a few short months ago, when it was impossible to picture this world without Erin Brooks on the World Surf League Championship Tour. Canada’s finest-ever surf export, the 17-year-old had just stunned all-comers by winning the Fiji Pro as wildcard thus signaling that this world was embarking on a new maple leaf festooned era.

Surf fans greedily licked their lips at the prospect of Brooks joining Caitlin Simmers, Molly Picklum, Sawyer Lindblad and Tyler Wright making the women’s side of the draw much more interesting than the men’s.

A gilded new era.

But alas, things have not gone quite to plan and with one more Challenger Series event to go, the Saquarema Pro, Brooks has yet to qualify. Bella Kensworthy, and Isabella Nichols have already locked their slots along with the evergreen Sally Fitzgibbons, who has become an inspiration to all with her never-say-die attitude.

But not Brooks, who has the Spanish maatadora Nadia Erostarbe, Tahitian darling Vahine Fierro and Brazil’s own Luna Silva nipping at her great white northern heels.

What a strange brew.

With any sort of stumble, especially an early exit in the land of order and progress, Brooks will have to push qualification off until 2026, which certainly feels an eternity away.

A Canadian fanbase very much holding its breath, preparing for an extra-cold winter.

The Saquarema Pro kicks off in but three days, anyhow, and there might be enough justification to Open Thread: Live Chat. Thoughts on that?

More as the story develops.

Load Comments

Kelly Slater acolyte Lewis Hamilton drawn into Diddy imbroglio after deleting post describing rapper as “my man Puff”

"To stand here today as brothers is an honour and a privilege.”

Over the past few years, FI ace and surfer Lewis Hamilton has become quite the regular on these pages.

When he was embroiled in a racism row with former FI champ Nelson Piquet after the latter described the former using an epithet outlawed to whites Lew fled the noise and went surfing in Malibu. 

With trademark sun-kissed braids pulled into a sensible bun, Hamilton was subsequently filmed polishing off a wave with a cool “what-me-worry” style.

Lewis Hamilton’s surf bona fides have long been documented. A regular at the WSL’s Surf Ranch, he has ridden the Melbourne tank and in 2021 posted a moving tribute to Kelly Slater on his Instagram account.

“He probably doesn’t know this but Kelly changed my life for the better. I want you all to know how great of a human being this man is. I am forever grateful for the time you have given me, for the insight and your passion for the waves. Thank you @kellyslater! Can’t wait until we can hit the waves again (praying hands emoji).”

And, who can forget when Lewis Hamilton nearly died at “25-foot” Pipeline following a dare from Slater. 

“This thing was massive, a huge tunnel, and I could see Kelly coming right down it in front of me,” he continues. “And I just had to make sure I didn’t get sucked in. So I dived down and grabbed the reef and prayed. I could hear the thing land behind me, like a bomb going off. My board got ripped off and snapped in half. I was very close to the end. But that excites me for some reason.”

Earlier today, Lewis Hamilton was again in the news, this time after deleting a tweet where he described the rapper Sean “Diddy” Combs as “brother”. 

The post, shared in 2018, read: “I grew up watching and listening to my man Puff. To stand here today as brothers is an honour and a privilege. I appreciate you bro for all you do, for being a GOAT and for always showing love. God bless.”

Sean "Diddy" Combs and Lewis Hamilton.
Sean “Diddy” Combs and Lewis Hamilton, brothers in white in happier times.

Diddy in the news, as you know, after being arrested on sex trafficking and racketeering charges. Back in March Diddy’s joint got raided by the FBI and agents confiscated AR-15s and one thousand bottles of baby oil and other unspecified lubricants.

Dry ass need juice, no matter how rich you is.

Anyway, the charges detail his alleged leadership of a criminal enterprise that engaged in activities including sex trafficking, forced labor, kidnapping, arson, bribery, and obstruction of justice. Specifically, Combs is accused of orchestrating drug-fueled events termed “Freak Offs,” where victims and sex workers were coerced into sexual activities, often under threats or use of firearms. 

The indictment also highlights his misuse of his business empire’s resources to facilitate these crimes, including arranging travel, accommodations, and the provision of drugs and cash for these events. Moreover, there are allegations of physical and sexual abuse, with law enforcement seizing weapons during raids on his properties, including AR-15s with defaced serial numbers. These charges not only paint a picture of Combs using his influence to exploit individuals sexually but also to maintain control through intimidation and corruption, thereby allegedly running a sophisticated operation that crossed into numerous illegal activities.

Kelly Slater, meanwhile, is making organic clothing and enjoying exhibition surfing events in France.

Who’s the better pal?

Load Comments

San Diego surfers in wild-eyed panic after first ever locally acquired case of dengue fever surfaces!

"Vector Control are working closely to respond quickly to prevent mosquitoes from spreading the illness in this area."

Now, any surfer worth her salt is very familiar with dengue fever. The mosquito-borne virus is extremely common in those exotic tropical locales that feature desirable waves and the aforementioned adventuring wave sliders are tangentially aware of the aches and pains, high fever and rash associated with the nasty little bug. Even the surfer who prefers cold waters and cold weathers is at least aware of dengue as it was first fingered being the cause of Andy Irons’ untimely death.

Well, San Diego surfers are currently in a state of wide-eyed panic as the first-ever locally acquired dengue case has just been reported in an area more known for India Pale Ales and fussy street tacos.

The county is reporting that a resident of Escondido became bitten by a mosquito and developed the dengue while not traveling to an exotic tropical locale.

Dr. Ankita Kadakia, County interim public health officer, attempted to tamp down fear by declaring, “While the risk of widespread transmission of dengue remains low in San Diego County, County Public Health and Vector Control are working closely to respond quickly to prevent mosquitoes from spreading the illness in this area.”

He then began spraying Escondido residents’ houses with toxic chemicals in order to kill the li’l biters for it is those pesky ankle swarmers that are most responsible for spreading the disease.

While there have not been waves in San Diego for months, now, any surfer who wishes to visit is being encouraged to go to Lower Trestles instead.

Over to you, now. What is the most exotic disease you’ve ever acquired? On a trip to Middle East, many years ago, I was graced with amoebic dysentery and forced to spend a week in a Jordanian hospital on heavy IV.

Those were the days.

Load Comments

Kelly Slater slashes $3.5 mill from listing price of redundant beachfront compound on Hawaii’s North Shore

Price of Slater joint on the North Shore's best street gets a wild haircut!

After six months languishing on the market for twenty-mill, Kelly Slater has slashed the list price of his sprawling Balinese-style beachfront compound on gorgeous Papailoa Road, the North Shore’s most coveted street, by almost twenty percent.

The eleven-time world champion who recently came out of retirement to compete in an exhibition event in France bought the six-bedroom, 7.5-bathroom house for a little under eight mill in 2017  and, earlier this year, perhaps to buy his new unnamed baby pretty things, put it on the market for twenty mill.

Despite the sprawling beachfront compounds myriad delights, the joint has failed to generate any serious interest hence the wild 17.5% discount. 

Kelly Slater house North Shore Oahu
The surprisingly modest street frontage at Kelly Slater’s Lani’s house.
Kelly Slater North Shore house
About as beachfront as it gets at Kelly Slater’s Lani’s house.
Kelly Slater house North Shore Oahu
Kelly Slater’s Lani’s house.
Kelly Slater North Shore house
Located on the most coveted street on the North Shore of Oahu, this exclusive beachfront estate is the premier offering in Haleiwa, Hawai’i. Set on an oceanfront lot traversing over a half acre, this compound encompasses elegant living while embracing the barefoot luxury lifestyle of the North Shore.

An examination of its price history on Zillow reveals the joint at 61-785 Papailoa Rd, Haleiwa, has pinballed in price ever since one shrewd buyer picked it up for just over a mill in 1998.

That buyer paid $143 for every square foot; at sixteen-and-a-half-mill it’s over two gees a square foot.

Kelly Slater listed it for rent in 2018 for 80k a month, dropped it to 72k in 2019, 59k in 2019 before sitting on 45k in 2020.

No word if anyone actually took up the rental, even at the cut-price rate of 10k a week.

If you didn’t know, Laniakea is a little way off the super highway traffic of Pipeline, Rockies and Sunset. It’s back on the western side of Waimea Bay and is a raw righthand point break that will reward the intrepid surfer who ain’t afraid to brave the paddle that is also home to the less-than-friendly Hawaiian tiger shark. If you like lefts, just around the headland is a joint called Jockos.

It’s interesting to note the previous owner tried to sell it for twenty-two mill almost ten years ago and settled on the almost-eight mill Kelly Slater paid.

Arrange an inspection here. 

Load Comments