Michael Caine in Blame it On Rio.
Surf fans react to revelations of World Surf League owner Dirk Ziff's secret trove.

The New Yorker reveals WSL owner Dirk Ziff’s “long rumoured secret trove unknown even to experts”

“Prepare to have your mind blown.”

The glamorous billionaire owner of the WSL, Dirk Ziff, who was honoured alongside his wife Natasha as “Waterpersons of the Year” at the Waterman’s Ball in 2018, has been revealed as the co-owner of the world’s greatest collection of twentieth-century guitars.

For decades, Ziff and his pal Perry Margouleff, amassed a collection of nearly six hundred guitars, including axes from Keith Richards, Neil Young, Les Paul and Chet Atkins and which includes Leo Fender’s first proto of the Telecaster.

The secretive trove, long rumoured in guitar circles but unknown even to experts, has been donated to the Metropolitan Museum of Art where it will form a permanent exhibition, opening spring 2027.

Margouleff, a studio owner and restorer, and Ziff, the billionaire surf league owner, had been collecting since the eighties, their shared obsession sparked at a 1983 birthday party.

From The New Yorker,

One night in 1983, at a birthday party at Tortilla Flats, in the West Village, Margouleff was introduced to a teen-age guitar player who wanted to buy a Marshall amp. Margouleff sold him one, and they started hanging out.The teen was Dirk Ziff, one of three sons of William Ziff, the chairman and owner of Ziff Davis, the magazine publisher.

The company sold off its hobbyist and travel titles in 1984, and its computer magazines ten years later, when it became clear that the sons didn’t want to run the business. The sons, led by Dirk, allocated the proceeds to an array of investments, including in the burgeoning hedge-fund sector. It was, as they say, a good trade. Dirk Ziff is now worth almost seven billion dollars, according to Forbes.

As it happens, Ziff had also seen the Who perform “Tommy,” in 1970, at the Metropolitan Opera House, with his father and his uncle. He was six. As the lights went down, his uncle said, “Prepare to have your mind blown.” It was. (At the warehouse, Margouleff showed me the red SG that Pete Townshend smashed up that night.) Ziff got his first guitar at Manny’s: a Japanese copy of a Sunburst Les Paul, for ninety-nine bucks. As a student at Trinity, a private high school on the Upper West Side, he played in a few rock bands when it seemed as if every other kid in Manhattan was swapping Black Sabbath and Led Zeppelin riffs. Before long, Ziff had serious chops, and ideas about becoming a professional musician. But after college, with the family fortune to look after, he embarked on a Wall Street career.

And, unlike the League, where Ziff turned a once moderately hip sport into a gluten-free vanilla cone only suitable for fifty-year-old-plus bourgeois white gals, when it comes to guitars he’s focused on their art and legacy.

The gift is one of the largest in the museum’s history and the Met’s gonna display the collection alongside other cultural artefacts, elevating the ol six-string as a cultural icon.

Also of note is Ziff is a wildly talented guitar player, doin’ session work for Carly Simon at one point.

Dirk Ziff, of course, will long be remembered for his speech at the Waterman’s Ball where he eviscerated BeachGrit and all who follow it, delivering an olive branch festooned with barbs.

Some of you are here in this canyon. Journalists, and other influential voices who unload on social media. I wonder if some of you get up every day and stir the milk into your coffee, thinking about what you can write that day that might humiliate the WSL. It goes way beyond constructive criticism, which we all need and which the WSL frequently deserves, and into the realm of foul spirited attack, which I think we can all agree we have enough of right now in this country.

“I have a message to the haters, and it is simple. Be tough. Call us out. Keep us honest. Tell us what we need to improve.
“But don’t pretend you don’t know that when you go beyond constructive criticism and cynically try to rally negative sentiment towards the WSL, when you try to take us down, you are not just going after us. You are going after Kelly Slater. You are trying to take down Lakey Peterson. You are going after the dreams of Caroline Marks and Griffin Colapinto. You are undermining the hopes of every kid who lives with salt in their hair, dreaming of being a world champion one day.

“And I ask you: Why? It seems pretty obvious that if the WSL keeps growing in popularity, and surfing takes its rightful place among the great and elite competitive sports, everyone connected with our sport, and certainly all the members of SIMA, will prosper, except maybe a few grumpy locals who have to deal with some new faces in the lineup. So…why not work together?

As well as the World Surf League and the guitars, Dirk Ziff also co-owns Cherokee Plantation, a “Spanish-moss draped monument to selective southern hospitality” in South Carolina that Forbes also calls “the most expensive–and the snootiest–private club in America.”

Cherokee Plantation was built in 1690 as part of a land grant to Joseph Blake, who cultivated rice amongst other things. His son Daniel inherited the property and, “as slave owners go” was considered “a pretty swell guy” who “despised affectation and looked with perfect contempt upon all snobbery.”

He built a church on his property, enjoyed by his 559 slaves, as well as providing clothing and moderate working hours.

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Live chat, Margaret River Pro, Day 4, “Sweetheart, that ain’t marinara sauce”

As WSL disables YouTube chat, BeachGrit welcomes all in wildly inclusive, gender non-specific free-for-all.

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Nikolas "The Greek Guillotine" Plytas (pictured) making history. Photo: Instagram
Nikolas "The Greek Guillotine" Plytas (pictured) making history. Photo: Instagram

Surfers hail “The Greek Guillotine” after Nikolas Plytas lands first ever double backflip on foil!

"It's off with their heads, it's the least I can do. Off with their heads, is the only phrase that always rings true..."

Ladies and germs, mission accomplished. It has taken roughly 65,000 years, but at long last a human has successfully landed a full double backflip whilst riding a foil. Nikolas Plytas, described as a “Greek water sports phenom” by the Times of India, invested six months working on the trick. Taking to Instagram, the 29-year-old declared, “Hardest thing I’ve ever done in my life – and also the world’s first double backflip in foilboarding. Over the past six months, I gave everything to this trick. Every time I was on the water, my only focus was landing it. Huge thanks to @roycegavrias for driving and filming every single attempt, and to @vlasios_maras for helping me understand the mechanics of doing more than one flip a year ago. Hope you enjoy it!”

It is not Plytas’ first first in the surfing world. But who could forget, just over a year ago, when the dishwater blonde shared, “Landed another new trick today. I would say it is a Frontside 360 backflip. How would you call it? It’s the second Worlds First trick I land within three days so I’m super exited.”

Well, none other than Kelly Slater rushed in to broadcast his opinion, “I’m sure I’ll get tarred and feathered for this comment,” the 53-year-old boyfriend opened, “but…I get that skaters call rotation based on direction of rotation but in surfing, everything done facing the wall is and always will be considered frontside. The first rodeo (clowns) were done going (and called) backside rotating opposite to this. If skating is a precursor for direction of spin then should this just be called a backside mctwist and not a rodeo? Seems the medium you’re riding matters when distinguishing and thus the confusion we surfers suffer. Super sick though not matter what.”

Definitive.

But do you think Slater will re-enter the chat, as it were, or are flips, be they one, two or three, simply beyond debate?

Have at it.

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Todd Holland, all busted up.
Todd Holland, all busted up.

“Baby-faced” 90’s surf star breaks neck, pelvis, back, hip and arm in freak backyard accident

"He distinguished himself from his peers with a jutting blond Sons of the Confederacy beard and an extensive country-western CD collection.

The last time the former world number eight surfer Todd Holland featured on these pages he was recounting the time he was chased out of the water in Brazil by enraged surf fans after he got a paddle interference on Victor Ribas.

Todd Holland, twenty-five in 1993, only escaped with his life when armed police, guns out, got him to the safety of a jail cell. He was advised to shave his beard and get out of the country, which he did, hidden on the floor of a car that raced him to the airport.

Unable to ever go back to Brazil, his pro career was done. Gave him PTSD he said.

Matt Warshaw describes Holland thus,

“He distinguished himself from his peers with a jutting blond Sons of the Confederacy beard and an extensive country-western CD collection. He also loved muscle cars, and for a 1990 surf magazine portrait he stood proudly cross-armed in front of his supercharged cherry-red 1969 Mustang GT.”

Now, Holland, who is fifty-seven, is facing a long recovery after falling from a ladder while doin’ a little pruning in his backyard.

“I have an open book pelvic fracture, broken ribs, sternum, neck, back and have severely dislocated my elbow,” Holland writes on his GoFundMe page. “I have already been through four surgeries since my arrival. Having another one on Tuesday to help relocate my elbow that keeps popping out of place regardless of surgeries. No movement in my left hand and after my last back surgery I have a bit of weakness in my leg. Hoping to be out of hospital by next weekend.”

It ain’t easy being non-rich and sick in the US, of course, and instead of sliding into bankruptcy or dying on a gurney in a corridor ‘cause your card too weak to get hit with hundred gee bills, GoFundMe offers a way out of the mess.

It was Kelly Slater’s big brother Sean who alerted BeachGrit to Todd Holland’s plight with a post on Instagram.

“Lifelong friend, neighbor, and surf buddy all over the world together as young and older people, Todd needs our help at this moment to heal,” Slater wrote.

 

View this post on Instagram

 

A post shared by Sean Slater (@captainseanslater)

Want to help? He’s got twenty three gees out of the hundred needed. Donate here. 

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Surf world bitterly polarized after surf loving dental student wonders if Utah or Florida is better choice for job

"I will be graduating from dental school. I want to go to Florida because I love to surf. My dad said go to Utah because they outlawed fluoride..."

Surfers who figured we reached peak polarization after Filipe Toledo’s second little wave world title* at Lower Trestles woke up with heads spinning, this morning, as a wild new divisive debate presented itself. The Durango Telegraph, which finds its home in Durango, Colorado and has been published since 2002, published a fiery query in its famed Ask Rachel column.

Dear Rachel,

I will be graduating from dental school. I want to go to Florida because I love to surf. My dad said go to Utah because they outlawed fluoride, and cavities are going to go up and there will be a lot of money to be had. He said old people in Florida have false teeth so no need for filings. I said Florida also outlawed fluoride. So what state do I choose?

– Tooth Brush

Surfers, near and far, immediately pitched into two camps. Those who were backing Utah celebrated the no fluoride mandate while also touting Zion Shores. Those who were backing Florida also celebrating no fluoride while also touting Typhoon Lagoon. The debate growing fiercer and more personal as it raged.

Thankfully, Rachel chimed in with her professional opinion, responding:

Dear Chomper Doctor,

I grew up with a dentist who loved the ocean. I mean LOVED it. The office was wallpapered in nautical motifs. The shelves had ships’ wheels and miniature lighthouses on them. He had boats (no thanks to me—I flossed!) and loved deep sea fishing. One problem: we were landlocked. Which is to say, in my mind, a dentist can afford to go surfing whenever he wants, no matter where he is. Go where your heart tells you, unless your dad is paying off your student debt.

– Rinse and swish, Rachel

Not helpful, tbh.

What are your thoughts?

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