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World Cup Pride Match.
World Cup Pride Match.

Ultra-straight Iran and Egypt to play in World Cup Pride Match

All of it very "World-Surf-League-under-Erik-Logan-esque."

This northern hemisphere summer, surf fans will be forced to endure a battle for attention spans. In one live sporting entertainment corner, the World Surf League will be in beautiful Rio de Janeiro for stop nine of its Championship Tour. John John Florence, Gabriel Medina and possibly Kelly Slater (as wildcard), battling through the back end of the calendar, collecting precious points. North, and in the other live sporting entertainment corner, the Fédération Internationale de Football Association will be holding its once-every-four-years soccer bacchanal, the World Cup, in Mexico, the United States and Canada.

The World Cup, which pits nation against nation, is one of those events which draws in those who otherwise avoid such things. Very difficult not to get caught up in passive jingoism etc. and, this summer, sixteen cities in North America will be hosting matches. One, Seattle, decided to celebrate the coinciding Pride Weekend, late in June, with its June 26th game.

As you may, or may not, know, the qualifying countries are tossed into a spinner and randomly put into groups.

Ultra-Straight Iran And Egypt To Play In World Cup Pride Match 2

As luck, or fate, would have it, the Pride Match on June 26th will pit Iran against Egypt.

Now, for the culturally illiterate, Iran and Egypt would both be considered, at least on paper, as “ultra-straight.” Homosexuality is, in fact, illegal in Iran and can be punishable by death. While not specifically banned, in Egypt, it is often persecuted under “debauchery laws.”

Neither country particularly pleased with the game’s rainbow gilding.

The head of Iran’s Football Federation, Mehdi Taj, called the business an “irrational move that supports a certain group.” Egypt, according to reports, is equally unhappy.

Both countries have signaled they will appeal though it is not exactly clear what.

All of it very “World-Surf-League-under-Erik-Logan-esque.”

Seattle World Cup organizers attempted to tamp down the furor declaring there will be no official Pride stuff inside the stadium and that “any symbolic activities related to the initiative” would be conducted elsewhere.

I studied in Cairo for a semester, once, and fell in love with Egypt and Egyptians. One thing that startled me greatly, initially, was that many of the men held hands whilst walking down the street, sitting in cafes or otherwise hanging out. And not like the way a parent holds a child’s hand but the way lovers hold hands. Interlocking fingers. My naive and Puritanical mind had difficulty processing this and I initially felt weird when the Egyptian male friends that I made would clasp my hand then lace their fingers though mine on outings to the bazaar etc. In honesty, the hand holding never became completely comfortable but I blame myself for that.

Juvenile hang-ups etc.

Maybe Seattle organizers can have a parade of men holding hands, bridge the cultural divide and usher in an era of world peace.

What would Erik Logan do?

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47 Comments
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7dollarsurfboard

When Two worlds collide.

If Relationship George (gay pride) comes into contact with Independent George (sharia law) they blow up.

justiceminister

Handbags will be at a premium before this laughable game gets under way. In summation this is a total nonsense.

Kama'aina

Always have thought of soccer as gay but apparently its even gayer than I thought

Strayan Cunt

Cheers mate but I will just stay in me lane and chat about surfing and writing shit cunts off haha

Beef & Beer

Doesn’t matter anyway
New Zealand will thrash both of those herds of goat fuckers
And Belgium…

Low wide stinkbug stance

lol it’s soccer not rugby

longtomssecondcuztwiceremoved

Gold medal for surf adjacency?

Somehow Chas got WSL and ELO into the story- otherwise a story about soccer.

channelbottom

“As you may, or may not, know, the qualifying countries are tossed into a spinner and randomly put into groups.”

Is this the sports equivalent of the ole’ car keys in a bowl?

Andy C

Cool, they could use Keala Kennelly head as the ball

Strayan Cunt

Hahahaha. You have to be careful what you say about KK cobber cuz Negs is a HUGE fan and even described her as an underground, core lord pioneer or some shit like that. He even cracked the shits when all I did was suggest she was a whingey, sooky carpet muncher who should be grateful she won a title and heaps of coin when she was bang average and couldn’t even make a takeoff. For some bizarre reason he even claimed my comments made him embarrassed to be a white, heterosexual male. Claiming they could use her head as a footy might send our very liberal Kiwi mate and moderator over the edge haha

Andy C

Sage advice

She’s still a cunt though

Strayan Cunt

Hunner %, she’s completely fucked. Only thing she pioneered was being the first Tyler and I reckon most of us could live without that ay

NEGATRON

Don’t forget I also called you a basic bitch.

Strayan Cunt

Haha sorry mate I forgot that with all the other insults you were throwing my way. What does that even mean anyways?

longtomssecondcuztwiceremoved

gotta pay that one.

Strayan Cunt

I must be a proper dumb cunt cuz I can barely understand a word of that haha

Barrelled

You just need your tall poppy handbook.

Strayan Cunt

Where do I find one of these handbooks?

Barrelled

Boganville

Derek Hynd's Missing Fins

They’ll just spit at one another and pat their asses on the pitch all match, and then hug and swap sweaty shirts after.

Strayan Cunt

Are you talking about the soccer or Bonny Blue and a group of her schoolies mates doing an outdoor shoot?

KnostMalone
Derek Hynd's Missing Fins

I’d wax up for that!

Stick man

what, your fins?

Derek Hynd's Missing Fins

My strap on!

Stick man

Lol!

toofattosurf

id bodysurf it fabulously…

janeausten

https://uploads.disquscdn.c…
Curacao? Curacao have a team? Why does that ring a bell? …oh yeah, that’s the blue stuff we stole from Dad’s liquor cabinet. Added some vibrancy to the eventual vomit.

Com Turren

USA vs. Australia group match also up in Seattle, which I am strongly considering attending. Any of you bogans gonna fly out for that?

Sean Connery

Never understood flying around the country or world to watch a sports team.

The Bitchy Crab

Knowing each player views the beta males in the stands with contempt and would, and do periodically, happily cuck their fans.

Rocks local

what, you don’t crisscross the globe for all the irukandjis contests???

Picard Madeoff

I just asked one of my Oz friends if he and his family will head to Seattle to watch the US kick the shit out of their bogans.

longtomssecondcuztwiceremoved

for soccer?

hell no, worst sport in the world.

Chief Hot stuff

To watch
Playing very fun

The Bitchy Crab

I think jiujitsu and surfing worse to watch.

longtomssecondcuztwiceremoved

for poms probably.

Chief Hot stuff

Yeah well its only the number one most popular sport on earth, by a long way

longtomssecondcuztwiceremoved

people are idiots

Chazz Michael Michaels

Incorrect.

Fishing.

KnostMalone

Is fishing a sport?

Jordy's low key claim

Rugby, fun to watch, but play… like slab surfing

NEGATRON

Erik would write a substsack about it that says a lot, but nothing at the same time.

Picard Madeoff

Someone, maybe Elo himself, needs to write a BG “where is he now” article about his latest endeavors.

Anon

More importantly, what would Tyler Wright say and how is she going to protest?

The Bitchy Crab

I think readying to protest against British grooming gangs etc.

7dollarsurfboard

Demand that no flags will be worn on their jerseys if the gay pride flag is not allowed. like they did at the abu dhabi pro


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