Burn, Michelob Ultra, Burn.
The brief truce experienced by American surfers just days ago is shattered this morning, as wave sliders from San Diego up to Seattle, Kennebunkport down to Key West are back at each other’s throats. Yes Pax Burrito, experienced most fully on National Burrito Day, observed the first Thursday of April. Surfers, of course, love burritos and don’t much mind if filled with carne asada or al pastor, grilled fish or fish battered and fried. A burrito is a burrito,” as the old surfer saying goes and peace reigned until this morning as the sun rose on National Beer Day.
Unlike burritos, surfers fight viciously and partisanly over suds. Wave sliders in Southern California willing to fight, or die, for Stone IPA while those in Northern willing to do the same for Lagunitas. Oregon surfers mocking both, declaring victory belongs solely to Ninkasi’s Tircerahops Double IPA. Seattle sliders sticking with Rainier.
Over on the east coast, the Alchemist’s Heady Topper ruling the north, Yuengling the middle and Cigar City Stout down south.
Heineken holding firm on the Hawaiian islands.
Surfers screaming invectives at each other, mocking the beer in each other’s hand as “gross” and “yucky.”
The World Surf League, with its multiple beer sponsors Corona, 805, Pacifico, Stone & Wood and whatever that one mixed with juice is, particularly deadly. Though international, in reach, its office continues to be in a veterinarian clinic in El Segundo, California.
Best of luck to everyone, today, unless you are a Michelob Ultra drinker then watch your back.
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Is there a National Finger Your Bumhole Day?
@Dogsnuts
Bitter as regret, and thick as porridge. https://uploads.disquscdn.c…
I dont think there is a single domestic american beer that is even drinkable from memory ?
Ha 69th comment…and 1 .4 hrs till Iran ‘s civilization will be wiped from the earth…exciting times …off to the comp,LOL….
“A whole civilisation will die tonight, never to be brought back. I don’t want that to happen, but it probably will.” Hooray, three cheers for America and its dumb cunt orange king, hip hip…………….
Criiiikey Chas, didn’t we sort this out last week ?
Gentlemen, this is democracy manifest.
A succulent Chinese meal with a fuckin’ VB longneck at 20 to 8 in the fuckin’ mornin’ will always be better than any burrito and any other beer at any time.
With a nasi n ‘tang runnin’ a close second, due to the fact you’ve just had, or just about to have, a bloody good surf if ya got that combo in front of ya…
Sorry, must disagree.
Mexican cuisine is the bestest on the planet.
Followed by Korean.
Just crushed a couple Coopers.
I once had three Michelob Ultras at a Lemoore comp. Perfect beer pairing for the venue.
Which year ?
All of em. Got in for free. Never surfed the joint.
This was the real beer debate:
‘Tastes great’
‘Less filling’
The American drinking culture has always left me a bit perplexed.
Having not been to the US as an adult, I can only report on how Septics consume their piss from a distance but it’s always seemed strange. Stunted. Burdened by shame.
To watch movies and Tv you’d think that bars in America are mostly dimly lit dungeons of regret and remorse. The protagonist will experience some hardship and it’s a trope of the flawed character thst they’ll retreat to sone subterranean looking venue with zero natural lighting and, a a sombre silence, start necking shots of whisky Even in the middle of the day, they sit in the dark drink their pain away amongst a handful of fellow losers. And it’s always spirits.
If anyone drinks beer it’s always presented as juvenile and oafish. Stumbling around at a barbecue, brandishing a still-full six pack of some insipid mid strength as their fellow lunchers look on with barely disguised contempt that a member of their society should let themselves be brought undone is such an uncouth manner.
Mostly it seems that there’s no joy in drinking. The alcohol is presented as a crutch, an impediment, a place to hide from life’s trouble.
Contrast this with Australia. Here alcohol is used to bond society. As celebration. To enhance life, not to drown it when it overwhelmed us.
Australian culture is changing however. Australia of the last millennium was starkly different. Due to the price of alcohol , drink-driving laws and the evolution of social media with its introduction of the permanent record of accountability, drinking is losing its grip over us.
This was a country that valued its Prime Minister holding the world record for downing a beer. Here a midday drink is not desultory whiskey sipped in a sullen cellar, it’s a delightfully cold schooner poured joyfully down your neck as the bright sunshine gives life to the cold amber inside the condensation frosted glass and the laughter of the fellow patrons of the beer garden turns the day into a party.
Drinking is more than an embarrassing derailment of life’s purpose, here it’s the glue that binds.
Our first currency was rum. People got paid in piss!
Drinking is the leveller that bridged all society. It wasn’t the purview if the down at heel, the depressed, the loser or the lost. It was the link between the millionaires, the athletes, the artists and the blue collar man on the street. It compliments our life.
When I was younger my best mate’s father was a copper. An old school head kicker who’d served in a branch known as 21 division who would be the fellas called in when regular policing wasn’t getting the message across to the bad guys. He was a member of a group of fellow coppers who called themselves FDIA – the Fittest Drunks In Australia. These few dozen hard men would meet up at this hall they’d set up as a bare bones gym and go full noise boxing training and workout then they’d retire to the nearest pub and down a dozen schooners before getting in their cars and driving home. My mate and myself would turn up when we felt motivated and were more than welcome, despite our long salty hair and red eyes from the half dozen bongs we’d smashed in the carpark. As long as you had a go in the gym and kept up in the shout you were part of the community. They weren’t looked down upon as degenerate drunks, they were respected professionals who liked a beer.
My father in law was a super fit surfer, spear fisherman and also a boxer ( golden gloves champ in the National service). He had a bread run…used to deliver bread and rolls to the surrounding neighbourhood from the back of his panel van. Running all morning, cheerfully welcomed into the houses of his customers. Unbelievably fit. He’d knock off at midday and if the surf or diving wasn’t on he’d go for a few cold beers at the pub. Often times with his daughter in tow. She’d be fifteen and drinking schooners at the front bar. No problems getting served. It was just life in Australia. Nothing seedy or degenerate. Life was complimented by drinking.
Anyway…bit of a 3AM caffeinated digression there, gents. Hope you boys sort out your preferential disagreements and share a beverage together. Just try and do it outside and with a smile.
You really need to stop believing everything you see on TV about the US.
I’ve met plenty of Seppos here and places other than the states and they typically reinforce the stereotype. Though they’ll almost always convert to Aussie expectations, they’re usually initially taken aback at the importance placed on drinking over here.
It’s a joy to see them abandon the reluctance towards a boozy counter lunch when the onshore comes up after a morning’s hard graft in the surf. They seem to fall into the spirit of things real quick!
Its definitely a different culture when it comes to beer. I was just fucking round and getting a kick out of the first few sentences/paragraphs.
I’m guessing all the seppos you hung out with were from San Clemente.
Never met anyone from San Clemente.
Mick loves to make money although slept on “Mickelob”. Hit me up in the DM’s.
Mate… As an American I’ll be honest. I love a drink and will drink anything……As long is its not an 805 beer.
Ok
This reminds me of the shoeless and unfiltered Aussies I saw in the movies back in the 80s. As I was convinced they were just a bunch of unsophisticated ancestors of British criminals. What has changed now that I drink regularly with those ancestors who migrated to the US is they do indeed wear shoes while they obviously took on the silly drinking habits of unsophisticated Americans who are embarrassed by our feeble lot in life. So when my Aussie buddies show up I’m always cleansing my palate with a Coors Light or maybe a Peroni before we crack open their old world reds for dinner. After they get properly smashed, I look around to ensure they haven’t stolen anything from the house before sending them home to give the ferret a run
Wake in fright was basically a documentary.
Was that mivie about the Sydney Grammer school teacher?
Top 4 right now-
– Miller lite
– Stone Buenaveza salt and lime
– Topa Topa Chief Peak
– M Special G town
Is Little St James Virgins Blood not available now?
Is this a real thing lol?
Sounds like something you would get on Epsteins island.
Yes, that’s the pun.
Ahhh…nice. Im thick.
Topa Topa
Miller Lite
Drop mic
less filling
Tastes great.
3 before paddling out at Sunset.
My old next door neighbour was a really good surfer who hurt his arm badly. It was dysfunctional and extremely painful so he’d down two longnecks before he went surfing. It was funny watching him paddle out all garrulous and then start to turn angry as the piss wore off. Funny but really sad too.
RIP fella.
Sierra Nevada harvest single hop IPA, Racer 5, Mcewan’s Scotch Ale to name a few.
Yuengling??!! lol
Is that like Natural Light or Keystone?
it’s a step up, but not a big step. Allegedly oldest brewery in the country, based out of PA, just came west of the Mississippi in the last couple of years – pretty straightforward lager, not bad, and some people love it – have a good buddy in Va (not a hardcore surfer) who won’t drink anything else – just not on the same plane as the rest of the list.
Does the after-taste resemble dog shit the way Butt-wiper does?
Man, I went out to Kiribati one time and all they had was that Budweiser rubbish. Tasteless shit.
As the old saying goes : Its like making love in a canoe…. fucking close to water.
I bought a can of Fosters Lager once, tasted like watery piss, so the only conclusion I can make is that all Australian beer sucks. Nobody I know drinks Budweiser or Coors.
What if you put the work Light at the end?
I’ve never drank any light beer but I’m not going to be like Blowin and talk shit about people that do. I can see how someone would want to drink beer and not get fat.
Or drunk. I used to drink beer and get trashed, in my teens.
Then one day I sat, on the beach, watching surfing all day in Cornwall drinking Fosters, which I quite like the taste of (for a lager), and at the end of the day I realised that I wasn’t drunk. Still just buzzed after a whole day of drinking. It was a pleasant surprise, as I had along walk home.
That’s the problem, when I’m drinking beer on a regular basis that kind of beer does nothing for me.
Tommy Ihnken told me it was New Jersey’s fav beer.
that very well could be true, my principal experiences out there were all south of the mason Dixon line.
of course, with the notable exception of their expertise in beach break barrels, pretty much everything about NJ is suspect
Definitely not an IPA drinker but you left out Pliny the Younger. My preference is Mexi-Lagers. Plenty to choose from but Merrick Lager is high on the list.
Oh yeah. I forgot how crazy people go for that Pliny.
How good could it be?
Oh man, food now drink…. Longtommy is spinning!!!!
Longtom or chunks?
Mate…Chunks is Strayan Cunt.
Oops, got that wrong again. Meant freeride. Brain doesn’t always function correctly.
I read this as Brian.
get on the keys for Bells Hip- make yourself useful mate.
it’s that good dude
Do you like 805 as well?
Negative
I don’t know whether to watch the Connor O’Leary/Rio Wada heat or Iranian genocide this evening. Article 2 Section 4!!! NOW!!!!
Watch the wozzle but keep an eye on the Houthis and the Bab-el-Mandab closure while eating a taco.
Split screen so you can watch Armageddon and Bells at the same time.
Either way, have this playing:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Rj_NUS9hwxA&list=RDIkgaMFjo_lI&index=26
lil’ wing…
all time fav……Hendrix live San Diego….??
rainbow bridge…Pali Gap…
and Honolua bay….
Bells Day 3 and World War 3 all in the same day? Exciting stuff!
We’re all disappointed with our Aussie brethren today. We thought that you guys didn’t like drinking and driving, and had a 0.0 limit on alcohol consumption when driving.
Then, to our great surprise, your most honest and rules-abiding cricketer, the Honourable David Warner, decides to do the unholy and have a few schooners before going racing through the streets of Sydney.
AND to do it on International Beer Day? Tsk Tsk. We all thought that David was better than that.
I remember you said you went to the surf ranch contest the same day I did. All they had was Michelob Ultra! Good thing I snuck in airline vodka bottles.
I must have been drinking the beer. But stayed as sober as possible as I had driven 4 hours that morning and drove 4 hours again after the contest.
About 3/4 through the Raconteurs set I left to go have a quick chat with Ke11y, where he basically ignored me (the poor chap must have been tired after such a long day) and then hit the road stopping for a coffee/coke every hour or so. I was in a hurry to get to SB to have a couple of drinks with a friend (and any stray chicas in the bars) before they closed up at unreasonably early hours.
I still use my Hydro Flask water bottle that we got that day, with our entrance ticket.
I still have my hydro flask too. Luckily I didn’t drive so I could drink all day. We had to drive back to the Bay Area so we didn’t stay to watch the band.
Here’s some footage of the concert, if you wanted to jog the memory. I remember it being very hot, on the day, and me looking to stay in the shade as much as possible. So I really didn’t mind drinking the weak beer.
The Raconteurs
https://youtu.be/5sXVDzgMr-o?si=4jfL6NicutPjvVje
It was hot. I wanted to have a little buzz when I saw an actual wave in the middle of the Sacto valley for the first time so I took two shots of vodka at the front gate at 8:30 am.
when I walked in Carrrisa Moore had ridden a wave and she was walking to the truck to get a ride back up to the top and I talked to her for a little while. As nice in person as she is in her interviews.
That band was so wasted on that crowd.
Maybe. But we were enjoying it, as well. At least I was.
Quite coincidentally I had seen them a few months before in a Bowl venue, where they also rocked out. I arrived in town to visit my mate and they were playing, so we went to see them. But in the Bowl I was too far away to appreciate the show. I Couldn’t really see the stage from so far away, which was different to my concert experience up to that point. So it was interesting to see the same show from just a few metres away, as was my regular concert-going experience in the Caribbean.
Also, Jack makes you lock up your phone (which I agree with) so this time I was able to snap a couple of photos and a short video clip for my digital-memory record.
I’ve been told that Chas and DR will no longer be welcome at the Oi Rio Pro, this year. The Brazzos are a bit miffed. https://uploads.disquscdn.c…
P.S – than you for the link to the old articles. There’s a real treasure trove down those rabbit holes.