An ode to the sublime experience of getting utterly pounded!

Come and share your favorite memory.

But when was the last time you were utterly pounded? Ocean waves of “historic” significance stacking out the back with your human, all too human, heart heaving right up into your human, all too human, throat?

Breathing in the salty mist, one suck at a time, while digging for the horizon with arms built of noodle, with hands lightly muscled by typing up the latest exploit-adjacents of the world’s greatest surfer Kelly Slater?

Of his luxury watch nemesis Laird Hamilton?

For me it has been far too long but there I was, minutes ago, breathing, scratching, duck diving, repeating until out the back and breathing again but this time actually huffing and puffing.

Another ocean wave, more than historic, maybe even three German Male Lower Legs or 897654 Surfline feet, there and mocking, forcing ego to crash reality but which wins?

Ego or reality?

Ego always.

Spin, noodle scrape, limp to feet, catch lip in that all too human head and…

…roll in the brine.

Knees bouncing off skull dulled by the mundane, leash tugging on leg, an economical Thai massage.

Getting pounded is totally underrated.

Share your favorite memory below.

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Mr. Potz’s Opus
Mr. Potz’s Opus
4 years ago

Well….there was this woman, and she said she was into “light bdsm…” and she asked if I knew what Pegging was….

Magnum
Magnum
4 years ago

Waco. 12 days ago. Got dragged on the concrete. Still all scabbed up.

toofattosurf
toofattosurf
4 years ago

ha charlie testing nega’s pudic mod m.o. over headline baited commentariat…

Chad Lebrone
Chad Lebrone
4 years ago

My wife had a very different take on this question.

Picard Madeoff
Picard Madeoff
4 years ago
Reply to  Chad Lebrone

THIS!

Sellme fitzgobbins
Sellme fitzgobbins
4 years ago
Reply to  Chad Lebrone

Did she get rash on her knees too? Brutal

notsurfingtoday
notsurfingtoday
4 years ago

Once in the supermarket a shopping cart hit me straight in the achilles tendon.

Gwen Walz’s Eyes
Gwen Walz’s Eyes
4 years ago

12′ to 15′ Laniakea

Billy Hunt
Billy Hunt
4 years ago

Wanted: lonely, lowely surf journalist looking for enthusiastic and humorous commentariat for witty and regular banter. Neglected by my trans loving “life partner”, looking for new endorsements and click bait topics, ready to listen now or later.

tim_nelsen
tim_nelsen
4 years ago

on a steel-wheeled skateboard…blistered the iron jaw…
pearling to my chin on either a knee board or an under deflated surf matt…bruised the ego…
opened the lens shop/

Pauly Matt War-Shore
Pauly Matt War-Shore
4 years ago

I’m surprised that Derek isn’t the one responsible for that headline.

Instalo Feedeira
Instalo Feedeira
4 years ago

Ode to that time Ashton gave a pounding

samwaters
samwaters
4 years ago

“to maximize the forces–one must minimize himself–the ego is a dead end”…..

Hippy
Hippy
4 years ago

Was alone in a peak field when I saw him…. walking with his kids toward my position, stop and leash up.

Of all the peaks he had to choose from.

Began reciting my rant in advance, had a very strong feeling he was going to say hi.

Literally, If I screamed, there was no one to hear except this guy.

Think the ocean sensed the building drama and unleashed a set upon my position. I still say “my” because my new friend was just half way out and probably didn’t notice the horizon turning dark.

Took the first left of the set and rode to the trench, sand’s been fucked up for ages and deep just off the shore break.

Rough trip back out, but once there I surveyed the beach and there were his kids, each holding a piece of his snapped long board.

Came in a long time after and went to find my slaps that I had left on the cliff, there he was. Hot as fuck wife, two sons and a daughter, all playing with the broken board pieces.

Dude was still in his steamer. Beach was pushing 80F and glassy as. I’m surfing in board shorts. This dude is sweating away, still even zipped.

Derek Hynd's Missing Fins
Derek Hynd's Missing Fins
4 years ago
Reply to  Hippy

Upvote for slaps. No one else I know uses that term.

Picard Madeoff
Picard Madeoff
4 years ago

My ex-boss and a Hermosa dweller uses slaps and it seems he does it to see who knows the word…

tim_nelsen
tim_nelsen
4 years ago

sometimes flip-flops, sometimes not…like after stubbing the big toe. bloody mess!

Picard Madeoff
Picard Madeoff
4 years ago
Reply to  Hippy

The headline is about pounding, lets focus on the wife

Andy C
Andy C
4 years ago

Last week when the misso went all peggy sue on me,

Still can’t sit down right

Tom
Tom
4 years ago
Reply to  Andy C

can you sit down to pee though??

Andy C
Andy C
4 years ago
Reply to  Tom

Mate I splash while I walk at the moment

Dogsnuts
Dogsnuts
4 years ago

Mate, I should not have even been a surfer. The amount of times I should have died is silly. It’s been a long tortuous road and I’m proud to say it was almost worth it.

tim_nelsen
tim_nelsen
4 years ago
Reply to  Dogsnuts

and an EBIRB/

https://external-content.du…

Return of the Samsung Board
Return of the Samsung Board
4 years ago

Woman 20y my senior

3 GMLL tall

Prob about 40kegs dry weight with 3kg spirits in her

Took a couple lips to the face

Longest hold down of my teenage life

astro
astro
4 years ago

Gnarr

Return of the Samsung Board
Return of the Samsung Board
4 years ago
Reply to  astro

Probably shoulda gone backdoor

Instead got beaten with my own pipe while The Melvins played on her phone

NEGATRON
NEGATRON
4 years ago

The Melvins. At least she had a ounce of taste.

Return of the Samsung Board
Return of the Samsung Board
4 years ago
Reply to  NEGATRON

She had an ounce

I got the full pound

Andy C
Andy C
4 years ago
tim_nelsen
tim_nelsen
4 years ago

stay tuned, should we?

Le Reynard
Le Reynard
4 years ago

I read the article thinking, surely someone will make this sexual… First comment, most likes. Love The Grit


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