"Super unfair!"
There was once a time when things were simple and people stayed in their assigned categories. Bad boys were bad. Society girls were rich. Jocks were sporty. Nerds were smart. Weirdos were weird. Surfers had heads filled with air. Society existing in perfect balance. Of course, as it goes with evolution, the main attribute of any in their designated camp was counterbalanced so as not to give one ultimate power. Bad boys, for example, smoldered and attracted society girls, bringing them down lest they rise too high. Nerds were ugly and awkward lest they combine their big brains and good looks to clean up all the babes. Surfers, empty and vapid, a good enough time but never taken seriously.
Harmony.
Alas, all has been shattered. While nerds like Mark Zuckerberg has been attempting to shed his ugly and awkward for years, it is clearly not working.
Enter the World’s Smartest Surfer
The world’s smartest surfer was, once, Bron Heussenstamm. The Southern Californian wasn’t a great surfer, though good enough to regularly have photos appear in magazines. He wasn’t that smart, but smart enough to get into USC. Barton Lynch and Ace Buchan also considered “smart” but by surf’s wonderfully low standard.
Now?
Kanoa Igarashi has shattered the status quo.
Yesterday, the Japan-by-way-of-Huntington-Beach 26-year-old posted a studious self portrait. Was he examining surf reports? Maybe putting items in his online basket then taking them back out again?
No.
He was attending class at Harvard.
Igarashi attends Harvard. He is the world’s sitting surfing silver medalist. He is the current World Surf League number 14. He has boy band good looks.
His only burden?
The voice of a muppet.
And occasional bouts with Tourettes.
Igarashi having so much, while others have so little, has sparked a new class war, one that threatens to undermine the last bits of peace and goodwill on earth. Picketing currently being planned for Portugal, where Igarashi also lives an incredibly rich and satisfying European life.
Super unfair.
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sort ur trash
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Lotta Stupid people at Harvard these days. As a second generation Mensa member that Owns a house on Oahu, shapes his own boards, doesn’t have to Compete or Work for Anyone! My Rocket Science Engineering friends and I Disagree. Not the Smartest! Not Even Close!🤣
Not bad for someone who chose to drop out of high school and get his GED.
He’s matriculating at Harvard because he realizes his competitive surfing career is going nowhere ….so he better study up.
Rediculous ! I am clearly the worlds smartest surfer, pffft !
Him, and his turncoat pos dad should go drink fukishima water thru a f straw! Hey World, if your worthless life in your subpar Country can’t get you there, don’t come freeload off of Our society. You’re a boy with no Country, trashbag!
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Nice to see Harvards new admissions process reward the best and brightest
You too can attend Harvard courses, its free and open to everyone.
Edumecate yourself.
https://pll.harvard.edu/cat…
I too have an “executive presence” certificate from Wharton. I am borderline functionally stupid with an Applied Comm degree from SDSU. My company said I joke too much and made me take the “executive presence” course. It cost $4K and I learned nothing other than these online courses are the biggest scam going.
Creative surfer/journalist?
(paraphrasing) “The other day at (secret spot) a woman, clothed in an expensive puffy jacket, sitting in a large lawn chair, was furiously typing away making a nice, healthy salary all while seated………
comfortably on one of Southern California’s most historic surf beaches.
And, in doing so, she was ruining the vibe for everyone else who chose
to come to this surf beach to, you know, surf.
an honest reply: ‘beg
you to stop writing articles. If you are too stressed out to observe
someone on a laptop, you need professional help. Also, what if someone
views a cafe the same way? It’s ok to ruin it for them? If you do
resort to a good ole fashioned pencil, stick it in your…’
Ha’vard grad vs. BG commenter. I’ll wait for the judges scores…
Exams will be the only final he sees
And here in the Ultra Hard comment section: the smart ass’s of surf fire off their loads of life.
‘Mum. MUM! Come here mum! QUICK MUM! Take a photo for me. Turn those lights off. NO mum, stand on that side of the table! Now, give me your glasses. Yes, I know it’s dad’s iPad! Oh my god YES, I KNOW this is dad’s shirt! Just take the damn photo mum! Ok… how do I look? Sweet! Now post it mum. Post it!’
How about Bryan Doonan, one half of the Doonan twin rippers, became a doctor.
Make surf dumb again.
One buys their way into USC Chas’…
Speaking of class wars, —-Slater has probably brought the most divisive shift in surfing since its inception, now we have a ‘privileged’ class, who can afford to surf tanks—as opposed to those who might never be able to afford to surf a tank.
We now have, the haves—and the have-nots.
Will the haves, (Saudis and the privileged), as they sip there Mai Ties by the pool, be looking down on the have-nots as lower caste surfers. Is this discriminatory.
Much to ponder here…
Igarashi is to Academia what those Tik Tok influencers that feature regularly on Kookoftheday are to surfing
Chas came to SoCal from Oregon and went boogie boarding and wanted to be cool. Then he was told boogie boarders are not cool got his ass kicked a few times and then Mr. Miyagi schooled him and mentored him, took him to a tattoo shop and gave him his first board. They paddled out together, taught him to pee in his wetsuit (definite barrel), and told him to keep his distance from the blonde surf gods. Chas washed Miyagi’s car to build up paddling strength and helped him develop the wide Karate surfing stance for which he is known. When he saw a turtle, Chas shouted out, I love turtles and Miyagi told him that we are all inter-connected, the tides, the moon,, the turtle…and that one say he would design a sandle that embodied these very principles. Don’t worry about being cool, Miyagi told him. You are a nerd but you will use that Big Head to create little blog to cover little surf league.
Most surfers are smart. Mark Richards, Shaun, Ian, Rabbit, Gabriel, Nate Florence – Kai Lenny – Ben Gravy – Tom Curren – Mason Ho – Gerry Lopez – Rob Machado – Sterling Spencer – Jamie O’Brien – Ben Gravy – Dave Parmenter – Griffin Colapinto – Mike Parsons
Lol, Ian, Lenny, Curren, JOB, Griffin?
But Griff journals! And meditates! And Nathan has been profiled many times for reading…actual books! Amazing